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Great Hangout, but No Hook-up?

By Candy

Your cell phone wasn’t even flipped open and words of confusion and disappointment were already rolling off the tongue. You both may have visited Cloud 9, but the climax was definitely not the “climax.” Okay, before you assume that he’s gay because there was no happy hook-up ending, not getting what you bargained for may not be such a bad thing.

The conversation jumped from topic to topic with no time to even think about awkward silence. The eye contact was borderline seductive. The night seemed flawless. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always guarantee fun between the sheets.

While consistent chatter over dinner is nice, it’s not the appropriate date barometer. That doesn’t necessarily mean, though he’s a dude, jumping down your pants is next up on the menu. Not all guys are looking to instantaneously hook-up with the girl sitting across from them.

So how about the eye contact? Let’s face it; attraction is what encouraged him to initiate the date to begin with. The simple road would tell me that maybe he’s thinking it over in his mind with a blank stare. But still, why didn’t he make his move? Enter the infamous “chain of friends.” Say, through great conversation, name-dropping begins (as it always does), this is the likely cause of his concerned facial expressions. Ties among friends of friends or previous hook-ups can completely extinguish any hopes for future fire. The family atmosphere between friends, especially in the Greek system, is a touchy subject (pardon the pun). Reputations, dirty looks and broken hearts are all at stake.

The point is to never assume anything. Every moment during the date is part of his interview process, weighing the pros and cons against potential nightly activities. The whole line about there being plenty of fish in the sea is, well, true, especially if you’re linked to his fish. If he merely went on the date to get you into bed the first night and doesn’t care about the “chain,” then that’s what he’ll get if you’re up for it. On the flip side, judging a guy because he didn’t ask you to come back to his place isn’t the smartest idea. If the date turns into something serious, trust me, you’ll look back and appreciate it. But hey, if you’re just down to get your rocks off for the night, maybe finding the guy who did your sorority sister in the bathroom at a mixer is more your taste.

Have a guy question, need relationship advice or wanna bitch about your man? Submit your thoughts to Ryan at ryan@collegecandy.com. He’ll provide you with words of wisdom in the next candy!