Have THE Talk

“The talk” – feared by men, favored by women and mastered by none. Here’s how to play it cool when you’re craving a little confirmation:

By Candy

1) Make up your mind. The first step to taking it to the next level is deciding what you want. Make sure that you know how you feel and that you have an inkling how he feels. Be sure that what you have in mind is realistic (i.e. causal dating to marriage is not the way to go).

2) Get ready. Think of a time when you both will be relaxed and connected. Don’t make a big deal out of planning a fancy dinner or waiting until after sex. Guys hate being pressured, and if it seems more spontaneous, it will seem like it’s a mutual conversation rather than an interrogation or ultimatum.

3) Out with it. When the subject is broached, be straightforward and let him know how much fun you’ve had, rather than asking him for specific answers. It’s best to ask how he feels in a way that lets him be honest without feeling guilty. Don’t mention any far-reaching expectations or plans, and be prepared if he avoids taking the bait. Chances are, he appreciates how you feel but just isn’t ready. Don’t argue or push the issue, and move on quickly.

And whenever you finally do bump it up a notch, don’t change anything overnight. Treat “the talk” like a proof of your status rather than an abrupt step up.