Lohan’s New Man: James Blunt???

Um…does anyone have a barf bag? And an answer for why one of the ugliest, whiniest dudes in music might be the newest squeeze of Ms. Lohan?

By Jess

According to this story, Lindsay Lohan and James Blunt were recently seen getting all touchy feely in a club and then leaving together. The article says everyone’s favorite AAer was seen “trying to hide from onlookers under her coat” as she exited the club with the skinny weirdo. Hell, I’d want to hide under my coat if he was on my arm too. Girl probably just wanted a booty call and took anyone who happened to be within reach. I mean, we’ve all had that less-than-attractive-hook-up. Unfortunately, cameras were flashing during Ms. Lindsay’s.

How on earth does this man get play? He weighs about three pounds, is as pale as my inner thigh, and looks about as manly as the 10-year-old I used to babysit who liked to wear his hair in pigtails. Plus, that voice. That horrible, horrible voice. He’s made a career out of bitching and moaning.

“Yeah, she caught my eye / as we walked on by / …and I don’t think I’ll see her again / but we shared a moment that will last till the end”

Excuse me? Putting aside the fact the lyric is lame, he sounds creepy and delusional. If some guy wrote that lyric about me I’d tell him to get a life…and then I’d get a restraining order.

And yet…he dated a model. And may now be in a…I shudder to even think…a relationship with my favorite Lohan. Look, I understand the allure of musicians as much as the next girl, and have dated a few in my time, but I don’t date someone simply because they’re a musician. I’m not blind. I know they seem more sensitive because they pour their feelings out onto the page but, come ON. I’m a redhead, its winter, my inner thigh is PALE, girls!

Am I missing something? Give a shout out to the comment section and let me know. I really don’t think I can be convinced, but I’m always up for a good debate – or a rousing, collective agreement!