Can I Get a Mr. Confident, Please?

“I’m a nice guy” he looked at me a little helplessly, “and that doesn’t always work out in my favor.”

By Jess

Smiling, I ran my hand through his hair reassuringly and tried to figure out how I was going to tell him we were over.

I broke up with Chad* (name changed to protect his pride. And mine.) because he was a Republican who only listened to talk radio and read nothing but Forbes Magazine, not because he was a self-proclaimed “nice guy”. Contrary to popular opinion, I have nothing against “nice guys”. I have nothing against polite, chivalrous, thoughtful dudes.

But you know what I do have a problem with?

Socially awkward behavior.

More often than not, a guy who insists he gets no respect because he’s just “too nice” is totally discounting the fact that he is also weird.

You know the type. I know you do. The over-accommodating, hovering, way-too-eager to please, semi-spineless guys who crack lame jokes every 47 seconds? The problem with these dudes is not the fact that they’re nice— because most of them are—the problem is that they’re overwhelming.

Girls don’t always want a bad boy, but I think most of us require a guy who stands securely on his own feet and knows how to say no every once in a while. There’s a big, heavy difference between “nice” and “weak”.

I think what it comes down to (just like everything else in life) is confidence. To find a nice guy who’s confident in himself at the same time is hitting the jackpot. It’s three spades in a row. An all-you-can-eat shrimp dinner at Red Lobster.

Just kidding. I could never eat that much shrimp. Nor would I want to. Espescially at Red Lobster.

There’s nothing like the sweet smell of confidence combined with the rosy aroma of a dozen roses delivered to your house. It’s not an easy combination to find, but once you do, I advise you to hold onto that man as long as possible. Those troubled bad boys, and socially awkward give-you-everything guys have a very short shelf life.

Just like shrimp. At Red Lobster.

What would you rather have, girls? Confidence, or someone who gave you everything you wanted?