Hey, Creepy Dude! Buy Me Bigger Boobs!

May 30, 2007 7:31 pm     Posted in Body, Sex  Jess - NYU g+ page

breast-implants1.jpgI live in New York. It takes a lot for me to get sketched out. I walk by a legless ventriloquist who sings Sinatra on my way to work and have witnessed a mouse jump from my TV and land smack inside a potato chip bag I had eaten out of only moments earlier. Strange men say things to me almost daily, and feeling someone lean in too close on the subway is more than an occasional occurrence.


By Jess

That being said, I am seriously skeeved out by myfreeimplants.com.

This web site is exactly what it says it is: a place where people (men mostly, I’m assuming) can help woman buy plastic surgery—boob jobs being the highlight. (Although it also advertises “Gummy Bear” implants. Which I can only guess would be…actually, I can’t guess. I’m afraid to.)

Chicks upload photos of themselves, and creepy men look at those photos and talk to them about how big they want their new boobs and how much money they need to raise. Women can put “personal items” up for sale (let your imagination go wild on that one, I’m sure you’re right), and men can request “custom photos of [their] favorite girls” in “specific outfits”.

So, and correct me if I’m wrong here, myfreeimplants.com seems to be a website where women whore themselves out and sell their used underwear to get bigger tatas (and Brazilian butt lifts). Some may call it ingenious, but I just call it cheap. If I were to do something that personal and body-altering, I’d at least make sure I was paying for it with my own money.

If you’re gonna carry around extra silicone, take pride in the fact that both of them are yours. Don’t be sharing your boobs with some freaky dude from across the country who needs to pay to get his hands on a girl’s panties. That just makes the whole scenario gross enough for a Jerry Springer episode.

It’s a free country. You can spend your money on kids in Darfur or you can spend it on Double D’s. But in either case, use your own Benjamins. The last thing you want is the person who helped you out knocking on your door in the middle of the night, wanting reimbursement…and a new pair of your Victora’s.

8 Comments on "Hey, Creepy Dude! Buy Me Bigger Boobs!"

  1. MISTY EDWARDS says:
    Thu, 27th Mar 20083:37 pm 

    I REALLY WANT BIGGER BOOBS

  2. trct144005 says:
    Sun, 27th Apr 20089:40 pm 

    whats wrong with the idea of finding some moron too buy you bigger boobs? Hey you are probably looking for some horney dude too buy your next drink

  3. sarah says:
    Fri, 2nd May 20081:19 pm 

    Im up in the air about it because i just had a baby, my boobs were big now there gross.. and im going through a seperation… is it wrong? how will i tell my next boyfriend oh some random dudes bought my tits? what to do…

  4. Trish says:
    Wed, 4th Jun 20087:30 am 

    I'm on that site and not all girls take their clothes off for guys, If you don't like what the site is all about then keep your nose out of it that simple, some of us have familys and bills that need to be paid and can't afford breast implants, so just shut the hell up and leave the site alone

  5. Trish says:
    Wed, 4th Jun 20087:41 am 

    Oh and another thing we don't whore ourselves out, yeah there might be a few girls that do some of the things you say but we are not all like that, I have never sent out nude pics of myself and I do have great conversations on the site other than talking about my boobs or sex, I talk about things going on in my life like I would with a friend, I'm not some cheap whore, I am married and I have a beautiful three year old son and my husband fully supports me, and no one on the site can come knocking on your door because all that info is kept private, and if you do give out your private info to someone they delete your account, so I suggest you know what your talking about next time you wanna call someone a whore, because your probably fat and ugly and jealous of all the girls on the site, so grow the fuk up

  6. lodu says:
    Mon, 8th Dec 200812:56 am 

    are bhen ke lodo mar jao, apni maa chuda ke aur apni bhen ko randi bazar me bech ke.

    kisi nangi ladki ko dekhne kka itna hi shauk hai to apne ghar me hi jhak ke dekh lo na…

    kisi ko boobs size grow karne ka itna hi shauk hai, mere ghar aa jao, free me 2 bachee bhi dunga..

  7. kell says:
    Wed, 26th May 201012:15 am 

    Hi girls dont go on to my free inplants the site is so full of dirty old and young men wanting pic of you nude nothing else dont do it it's better saving up then pimping yourself out for a small bit of cash,It takes far to long to get the money on there its creeper

  8. Nicole says:
    Tue, 25th Dec 20125:38 pm 

    I really need a new pair of boobs… I’m a single mom with two boys,my boons are constantly falling out of my bra. I have a problem Victoria Secret can’t even help. Please help me!

    Thanks a bunch <3

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