Love the One You’re With?

My friend has a hot boyfriend, but she hates him. What “Stan” has in looks he lacks in personality. Needless to say, they’ve been together three years. Ridiculous, right? I’d ditch the guy before he knew what hit him, but I have a remarkably short attention span.

Every time I see my friend, I give her shit about Stan, especially because she likes fifteen other guys. There was one guy in particular, Carl, that captured her attention a few months ago but turned into a big unrequited mess. So she always responds to my query of “Why the hell are you still with Stan????” in the same way: with a song, more specifically, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young’s “If you can’t love the one you want, love the one you’re with.” Since she can’t have Carl, the guy she wants, she’ll continue to love Stan, the guy she’s with. He’s a good stand – in boyfriend, she tells me: He does his job of looking good and also offers other perks, like a vacation home and a car.

I still think I’d dump boring Stan, but what do I know? I’m serially single. So what do you think? Is it better to have someone you love, but have no spark with? Or is it better or have no one at all, but the possibility of finding a sparky someone?

Maybe it doesn’t matter — My friend and I represent the former and the latter, and we basically function at the same level of happiness and satisfaction. But I know we’re both still on the perpetual lookout for fire regardless of our romantic statuses. Sorry, CSNY.

Would you dump him or keep him around too?