Nicole Richie’s Baby Mama Jail Drama

Have you heard the rumors? Nicole Richie might be pregnant. With that ugly guy’s baby. What’s his name? Joel “My Face Looks Like Someone Punched It Repeatedly” Madden.

By Jess

The two have only been together a few months, but sources are saying that Nicole definitely has one in the oven, and might have just done so to keep herself out of jail.

What? you say, that’s a horrible reason to have a baby! You say that because you’re a rational human being with a tight grip on reality. Ms. Richie is not like you. She has a famous dad and lots of money and spends her time doing nothing. She’s also facing jail time for a DWI arrest that happened earlier this year. Dealing with consequences is not on her agenda—it’s too full of doing nothing—and since she’s removed from the normalcy you and I inhabit every day, having a baby to stay out of jail probably seems like a fantastic idea.

What do you think, lovelies? Is Nicole spoiled enough to have herself a Keep-Me-Out-Of-Jail baby? Or is it just media speculation?