Inmates to Paris: Skittles is the New Blush.

I’m not a big make-up girl. I mean, I don’t really leave the house without a little bit of blush and eyeliner and tinted lip balm, but any kind of heavy concealer or shadow looks stupid on me, and I always, always, always get that shit in my eyes. No matter what. Mascara is also my enemy.

Thank god I have long enough eyelashes, because I just can’t bare the old stinging sensation when it somehow manages (and it always does) to get into my contacts.

But for all my naturalistic ways, I can’t say I’d be happy with using Skittles and Crystal Light to make myself pretty. Thank God I have the freedom to go to the drugstore. The inmates at the Charlotte County Jail aren’t so lucky. They’ve gotta improvise.

“We get some hair grease stuff and put it on our lips.” An inmate recently told reporters, “The ink pens that I have, we use as the eyeliner. This is coffee, the eye shadow. We use the glitter from cards, so thank goodness people send cards with glitter on them.”

“The lips are Crystal Light and the blush is Crystal Light” explains another inmate, explaining the use of “fake-up” is a way to feel human and womanly behind bars. “Basically just being here for so long you’ll find a way to look pretty”.

As a kid, I remember rubbing candy on my lips in an imitation of lipstick, and painting my nails with markers before my mom would let me buy polish, but I can’t imagine doing that sort of thing now. It may help the inmates feel better on the inside, but it seems outright sad to me, like a half-hearted attempt at reclaiming some kind of real world freedom. I’m sure the sugary residue makes it very clear at the end of the day where these ladies really are.

I’ll stick with Neutrogena and obeying the law, thank you very much.