Maybe She’s Born With it, Maybe It’s Free Boobies

Yippee! So you might remember our lovely Jess’ blog on myfreeimplants.com, that skeevy site where men basically sponsor ladies who put up profiles and buy them boob implants. Sweet life.

By CC Staff

Well super-cool Jessica Levine of Florida decided the website was no booby trap (pun most definitely and superbly intended) and ended up winning a great new set of lady lumps. Good for her, way to go chicky.

Really, I’d bash this whole system, website, idea, all the girls who actually participate, all the guys who actually give up their hard earned Benjamins for some lip-glossed randy, but honestly? It’d be too easy. I feel no need to bother.

The best part? The check was presented to Levine on the last day of the Erotica-LA convention (at least it wasn’t Star Wars?) by the Pulitzer Prize winner Jenna Jameson (just kidding).

Now, if Jameson and a porno parade are involved, it must be a pretty legit organization, no doubt (somewhere Hugh Heffner is nodding his head).

The moral of the story?

If you want free boobies, put on naughty costumes, take pictures of yourself, and hope that there is a lonely creepy (loaded) old man out there who finds you worthy.

Don’t worry about that war still going on, or toil over the fact that none of our upcoming presidential candidates support gay marriage. Besides, global warming won’t be that bad with a shiny new pair of silicone double D’s, duh.

Thanks, myfreeimplants.com!