I Don’t Like Porn. There, I Said It.

July 20, 2007 - 6:48 pm By Jess - NYU

jj.jpgI’m not a porn person.

I know, I know. Shock. Surprise. Gasp.

It’s just never done much for me. I don’t dislike porn, I just don’t understand what the craze is about.

Now, look, every once in a while one comes across an image or something late night on HBO that she doesn’t mind staring at and using later, but actively seeking pictures or movies has never been something I’ve put my time into. Not because I’m not a sexual person, not because I’m embarrassed, and not because I think it’s “wrong” for girls to enjoy pornography.

I just don’t like it.

For one thing, the guy is never attractive. If he’s not hairy, he’s fat. If he’s not fat, his face looks like it got run over by a truck. A big dick doesn’t make you hot. It just means you’ve got a big appendage attached to and ugly face. There’s nothing less fantasy-worthy than a good-looking girl getting rammed by a gross dude—at least for a woman. It just reminds me of all the mistakes I’ve made.

Secondly, I find hard-core pornography disgusting. There’s nothing gross about the sexual act, but there is something unappealing about a 10-minute close up of a blow-job. I already know what that looks like, thanks.

Thirdly, I can’t stop thinking about what the “actors” are going through. Are they having fun? Do those girls really enjoy spending hours and hours with a guy old enough to be their father? What about their dreams? Is this really what they saw themselves doing?

…Okay, so maybe I’m over-thinking it. But just because something is arousing doesn’t mean my head shuts off!

And why is everyone completely shaven? Why do all the girls have hand-drawn eyebrows? Why is every porn director ugly? Are the male “actors” required to slick their hair back with inches of grease?

What do you think, lovelies? Are there any other girls out there who don’t dig porn? Why don’t you like it?

And if you do like it, are you watching something I’m not?

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6 Comments on "I Don’t Like Porn. There, I Said It."

  1. Erika says:
    Mon, 23rd Jul 200710:52 am 

    Haha good post….yeah although I watch porn quite often I do tend to question myself about the little details. I read an article/bio on an “upcoming pornstar” once and she mentioned that something like 80 percent(a ridiculously high number) of pornstars were drunk or on some kind of drug during filming(not including those high off weed). And now thats all I can think about. Hmmm.

  2. Matt says:
    Tue, 4th Sep 20072:55 pm 

    Too many people look at porn as a self thing. Watching porn with a partner is a very healthy way to get new ideas to spice it up a bit. Now you might say “Why would you need to spice it up a bit? If you love them you should love having sex with them everytime” K, well…my answer is this…do you think anyone enjoys running through the same handful of positions they know everytime they have sex? NOO…and if you do your so sadly mistaken. Watching it with a partner is a good way to say “Hey that looks new!” or “We should try that one!” It’s a good way to find out what your partner likes best and further explore the sexual stimulations and fantasies of your loved one. So stop looking at porn as something you use to please yourself, but rather a way to explore how to better please your partner. Because a large percentage of porn consumers use it as a mutual stimulation, or idea grabber (ruling out the 13 year olds that click ‘enter’ on every 18+ site cause they’ve never seen ‘one’ before)The majority of people you catch actively searching for porn for personal pleasure, are either underage to begin with, have never had sex and or have had a long drought in their sex lives…Many women enjoy porn, they’re just less likely to be open about it. It’s like a guy being open about liking chick flicks or soap operas (and some of them do…i personally know 3 closet soap opera fanatics, and for all you psuedo-macho, every day must be filled with testosterone guys out there who think they’re gay for doing so, they’ve prolly had more chicks in their bed than you because of this interest. Watch one one day, I have, I hate them, the acting is terrible, but not watching them just shows that your afraid you’ll like them from your own personal impressions they’ve given you.)

    P.S – psuedo is a prefix meaning, false, fake, or self-implied for all you ppl wondering wtf i’m talking about there.

  3. Jere says:
    Sun, 21st Oct 20075:10 pm 

    Exactly, everytime I watch it my mind wonders off to think about the people in it. Drives me nuts! I still watch it time to time but hardly never enjoy it.

  4. Stacy Kidd says:
    Sat, 19th Apr 20084:25 am 

    I think some of it boils down to the difference between men and women; most men are more physical when it comes to sex, whilst females are more thought-driven, rather than enjoying what they see. Of course, that’s just a generalisation, though for me it’s definitely true.

  5. V says:
    Wed, 23rd Apr 20085:04 pm 

    Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I find sex kind of sacred…and not in the sense that I only prefer missionary style, or have never had a blindfold on or pretended I was a Swedish nurse out to heal my boyfriend’s ‘tender spots’. However, porn somehow does not appeal…..If you look it at when you’re not horny, you realize its just a people humping each other like animals, with camera’s around them, fluffers waiting for their cuts, and, plainly a business.

    My bedroom (and kitchen, and living room, and bathroom) is sacred, because it’s real. that’s what’s hot about it.

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