Key to Happiness: Think Like a Man?

When I first glanced at the title of a recent article from the UK’s Daily Mirror, I brushed it off and figured that “Think like a man.. and be happier, healthier and slimmer” was another cheesy piece that was not applicable. But, after reading through it and giving the tips some thought, it actually doesn’t sound so bad.

By Abby

See what you think:

THEY DON’T DIET

“But men don’t really diet,” says nutritionist Carina Norris. “They rarely attach emotion to food and they tend to listen to their bodies. When they’re hungry, they eat. When they’re not, they don’t. And if they fancy steak and chips, they go ahead. Whereas women eat when they’re sad, lonely and bored, and not just because they’re hungry. Women also avoid ‘bad’ foods and stick to ‘good’ ones, then feel dissatisfied, which can lead to bingeing.”

What to do: Don’t make any foods off limits and listen to your body’s hunger needs.

THEY EXERCISE

“Pictures of Posh’s dimpled legs prove that dieting alone won’t keep you toned. Women are more likely to diet to stay slim, than exercise. This means they don’t have any lean muscle, so they don’t burn as many calories as men, and can end up with sagging skin.”

What to do: Make sure you are mixing cardio and weight-lifting. Don’t be scared of “bulking up.”

THEY’RE SELFISH WITH ‘ME-TIME’

“Whether you’re living with a man or married with kids, chances are you’ve cut back on those nights out and marathon shopping trips you enjoyed when you were single. As for your other half? He still plays football every Sunday, and never misses “a few beers with the lads” every Thursday, right? Women on the other hand are natural people-pleasers. But they often please everybody except themselves, which leads to resentment.”

What to do: Be selfish, don’t let your boyfriend rule your schedule.

THEY DON’T DWELL ON PROBLEMS

“A problem shared is a problem, well, doubled, according to new research. Experts from the University of Missouri in the US have discovered that excessively talking with friends about problems makes the problems seem worse, and increases depression. And, let’s face it, raking over the details of a bad break-up is what us girls do best. Men tend to ‘problem solve’. If something breaks, they want to fix it immediately, and move on.”

What to do: Talk your problem over with a close friend, discuss a solution, and MOVE ON.

THEY MOVE ON QUICKLY

“Planet celebrity is full of examples of men moving on from relationships quicker than a speeding bullet. Rod Stewart found Penny while his ex Rachel was still debating whether to end the marriage, and Brad Pitt had a ready-made family in place by the time it took Jen to draw breath from the shock of their split. Men tend to move on easier than women.”

What to do: Take your time to mourn the relationship, but not too much. A long, drawn out mourning period is unhealthy and gets you nowhere. Get back out in the social/dating scene!

THEY NEVER FAKE IT

“Orgasms can ward off stress, anxiety and headaches, and in men they reduce prostate cancer risk. Oh, and they feel pretty darn amazing too. So why is it that men nearly always orgasm during sex, whereas more than 50 per cent of women admit to regularly faking the Big O?”

What to do: Stop faking! You are only selling yourself short in the end. Take the time to figure out what works for you. Once you reach that point, it’ll be so much better knowing you got it right.

And just for comedy’s sake, so as not to extol men as completely perfect, the article also included some habits you DON’T want to pick up…

“FIVE MALE HABITS YOU DON’T WANT..

Being scared of visiting the doctor – lump, what lump?

Scratching yourself in public and thinking that no one has noticed.

Drinking so much beer, your boss asks you if you’re pregnant again.

Thinking that farting and burping is clever or funny.

Spending a fifth of your wages to watch a bunch of young men running round after a ball.”