Guys, if any of you are reading this, you may want to stop right now.
Seriously. Honestly. Look away.
No? Alright…
A Russian woman set her ex-husband’s penis on fire last Wednesday while he sat naked in front of the TV, enjoying a nice glass of vodka.
“I was burning like a torch” the injured man is quoted as saying (undoubtedly through a waterfall of tears), “I don’t know what I did to deserve this.”
No word on how she did it, but the ex-husband’s prognosis does not look good. When asked about his chance of a full recovery, a police spokeswoman admitted it was “difficult to predict”.
I’m not quite sure how one recovers from a burnt penis.
Reuters is reporting that the attack happened after the divorced couple spent three years living in the same apartment, a common occurrence in Russia where “property costs are very high”.
Perhaps Mr. Naked had sat spread-eagled in front of the TV one too many times. Perhaps he had a nasty habit of finishing off the house vodka. Or perhaps he was a horrible person. Which of course begs the question:
How horrible do you have to be to deserve a scorched penis?
Find your dorm BFFs
Get the CollegeCandy browser!
Got something to say? Something to share? Email us!
Men are all about the "I Love You"
More babies for Lil Wayne!
Ooooh, take that, Rachel Ray!
Stop picking yourself apart. You're perfect!
Who's the most overpaid star in Hollywood?
