Marriage Decline for the 20-Somethings, Rejoice!

I’m pretty sure EVERYONE I know is getting married.

That is… except me. And I’m in no rush. No rush at all. I have tons of friends who are getting married. And some of them, the ones who have been together for 5 plus years, or the ones who have been dating older guys for a while, those situations I understand. But the girls who are getting engaged during their junior year of college?

Cut me a break. It’s unnecessary.

You do not have to get engaged to be in a secure, stable and mature relationship. Going through years together shows much more commitment than a big rock.

Of course, I want the big rock one day, but I also want to be emotionally ready for all that marriage entails. Marriage is meant to be a lasting union, not a trend that everyone has to follow.

This isn’t fashion, ladies. You can’t decide you don’t like your hubby next season when suddenly you feel like he’s out of style.

I have a friend from high school who I have just found out is 23 and getting a divorce. And they were one of those relationships everyone thought would work. I also know another girl who is now a senior in college and on her second engagement.

I want to get married young enough so that I can enjoy being married before I’m ready to settle down with a family. But I don’t want to be young enough that my fiancé and I have yet to experience the real life situations that make a couple grow together.

But this, THIS is GOOD NEWS. I am no longer so incredibly disheartened by the marital status of everyone in their 20’s because apparently, the trend is going out.

USA Today says that “the trend toward delaying marriage has emerged over several decades as economic and social forces have made it more difficult for those in their 20s to reach independence. Sociologists and demographers say other factors are also at work, including increasing numbers of cohabiting couples, more highly educated women who have fewer highly educated men of comparable age to partner with, and more choices open to women than in decades past.”

Praise the Lord! We are shacking up, getting an education and facing a world that while economically makes it hard for us to be financially stable has more choices open to our gender.

Finally, we are able to realize that a ring does not make the relationship. That the white dress is not just for the virginal woman and that MARRIAGE isn’t synonymous for SEX.

Wait until you’re really ready. Do it before the big day. Make a smart decision because you are a smart woman. Realize that you don’t have to marry your college sweetheart just because everyone else is.

Marriage should be forever, not just for now.