Obsessed with Being Single

So, you’re single.

By Jess

Do you embrace it, or bemoan it? Is it exciting, or just exhausting? Are you here by choice, or because you just can’t seem to land a good partner?

Society would like us to think that there’s only two ways to feel about being single; awesome and shitty. Either you’re a flirt who has no intensions or settling down or a depressed cat lady lighting shrines to the dating gods.

But maybe you’re both. Maybe there are times—watching couples fight on the street, cuddling up in a freshly made bed, spending a day shopping—when you’re completely fine with and happy about being alone.

Other times—finding yourself without plans on the weekend, seeing couples kiss on the street, sitting alone in your living room on a rainy Sunday—being single sucks the big one.

Switching between moods can even happen over the course of a single day.

So why do shows like Sex and the City, Grey’s Anatomy, and whatever reality dating show is popular now do their best to make the idea of “singleness” something to be picked apart and obsessed over?

Why do we care if Scott Baio is 45 and Single? Why is it so important that Carrie find a man? Why is hooking up with your best friend in a hospital storage closet more important than saving lives?

In our quest to calm ourselves down about being alone, I think we’ve actually heightened the panic and fixation. Love stories have always been a big part of our entertainment, but constructing entire franchises based off of which celebrities are hooking up with each other and who’s going to have that baby first, creates the illusion that if we’re not constantly preoccupied with our dating status—something is amiss.

Is life really only about finding true love? If so, why is America so set on embracing the idea of individuality? Does it often feel like these two polar ideas are ripping you in half?

What do you think? Have we put so much emphasis on finding a forever partner that we’re letting it take over our lives?

Do your single-status feelings change often? Or are you one of those people who are single for a black and white reason?

Are you okay with being single?