What the Hell is Inside Your Purse?

November 27, 2007 3:15 pm     Posted in HaHa  Jess - NYU g+ page

purse_contents.jpg Andy Rooney, a super old guy who used to make movies and now just sits in an office and lets 60 Minutes totally take advantage of his oldness, recently ranted about how Americans are carrying “more stuff than they used to”.

The Duhness factor of his rant notwithstanding (I mean, what did people carry around in his day? Keys to a car they powered with their feet?), I decided to take a cue from Jezebel and go through my own purse to see if all the crap shoved inside was stuff I actually needed.

(This is a day when my bag is not splitting at the seems from carrying my giant, heavy laptop.)

1) Burt’s Bees hand cream: Totally needed. Since I can’t ever hold onto a pair of gloves longer than a week, my hands take a beating every winter. Unless I want the skin to rip off, I gotta moisturize at least twice a day.

2) Three tubes of Chapstick: Okay. Three might be an excessive number…but sometimes I want my lips fruity, other times I want serious moisture action, and every once in a while, a little instant caffeine.

3) Sunglasses / Reading glasses: The reading glasses I could probably just throw into the trash. I’m too vain to ever put them on, and spend most of my day squinting.

4) Kashi granola bar: Kashi is the sh*t. And you never know when you’ll be starving.

5) Metro card: Hello. You think I have money for cabs?

6) Wallet: Obvi.

7) Two packs of gum: Minty one day, bubble gum the next. I see this as a necessity.

8 ) Band-Aids: Instant blister relief

9) 4 Pens: 4 is nothing. I used to have 10, until someone pointed out how weird it was that I hoarded other people’s lost and forgotten writing implements.

10) Notebook: Sometimes I just need to write down that brilliant thought.

11) Scrap from Magazine: I’m planning on buying the face cream on page 98. Someday I’ll get to it.

12) New York magazine: Look, sometimes I don’t feel like looking at other people on the subway. Pretending to read solves this issue.

13) Piece of cookie in plastic bag: How long has that been in here…?

14) Tiny Packet of Lube: How long has that been in here…?

15) One Glove: Maybe I’ll find the other one someday.

16) Minnie Mirror: I’m not vain, I swear. I have contacts, and sometimes dust gets inside. Seriously!

17) Clementine: These things are only in season for a few months! I eat 3 a day.

So, yeah, I carry a giant bag full of (mostly) necessary items. I won’t deny that it doesn’t get heavy, but downgrading to something small and compact just isn’t an option when you live out of your purse.

What’s the weirdest thing you have in your bag? Think yours is bursting with even more stuff than mine? Let us know!

14 Comments on "What the Hell is Inside Your Purse?"
  1. Kristen says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 200712:54 pm 

    I have a pair of socks that aren't mine in my bag. Nooooo idea how they got there…

  2. Lindi says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20072:20 pm 

    Kristen, maybe you should think about cleaning out your purse???

  3. MOnica says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20072:22 pm 

    I saw the segment on 60 minutes. I never much thought about it, but it seems everyone these days is carrying something.

  4. SaraJane says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20072:24 pm 

    Apparently I had an open tube of Airborne in my bag and when I spilled a bottle of water… yikes, what a mess.

  5. AJ says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20074:28 pm 

    No condom, tampon, or iPod? What kind of 20ish American chick are you? :)

  6. Cathy says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20075:11 pm 

    digital camera

    thumb drive

    keys

    chapstick

    lipgloss

    highliters

    sharpie

    planner

    plastic

  7. Amber says:
    Tue, 27th Nov 20076:18 pm 

    At this moment

    wallet

    4 lip glosses(i like variety)

    keys

    7 pens

    Pamprin

    mini baby lotion

    party flyer

    hand sanitizer

    Burts Bees lip balm

    thumb drive

    sketch design(i do fashion designs)

    cell phone

  8. Natalie says:
    Wed, 28th Nov 20071:26 pm 

    Wallet

    Planner I need to use more

    Colored Pens (design major)

    External Harddrive

    3 pens (need to stock up)

    Keys

    iPod

    Prescriptions

    Lipstick, gloss, and liner

    mirror

    Orbit

    3 condoms

    headphones

    Student ID

    Checkbook

  9. amy says:
    Sat, 3rd May 200811:52 pm 

    I have superglue in my bag

    And a tape measure, a Gossip Girl book, 3 chapsticks, a pair of sunglasses, a mini umbrella, a scientific calculator, wallet.

  10. Kristy says:
    Mon, 21st Jul 200812:10 pm 

    In my bag currently…

    (this is probably going to be very detailed lol)

    Rimmel cover-up (for the -cough- sightly problems on the face)

    Pad (must have)

    Ipod (with headphones)

    Deodorant

    3 things of eyeshadow (I like variety, although I usually never use them)

    2 things of eyeliner (pencil, and once again for variety)

    Mascara

    Wallet

    (in wallet) 39c, emergency contacts, gift card, pic of lil sis, and info card

    Watch

    Hair tie

    Rubber band

    2 Pens

    Sticky notes

    chapstick (omg its pink lemonade

  11. T says:
    Thu, 7th Aug 200810:17 pm 

    I spent nearly $200 on a TINY Coach purse and now I totally regret it because I have had to change my wallet (to an older, thinner one), I can't fit my digital camera unless I want to take out my lip balm and phone. That's it. I WANT A BIG BAG.

  12. Emma says:
    Tue, 10th Feb 20097:40 pm 

    WELL: brush. burts bees lip balm and chapstick. medicated blistex lip balm and chapstick. four tampons in a cute leapard skin patterned case. red sequin pen holder with seven pens and two sharpies. tide to go pen. mittens–i live in north dakota! mascara. liquid cover up tube. sally hansen 24 hour lip treatment. glasses. wallet–with lots of stuff in it. medication. orbit in sweet mint. keys. three lotions–one large bottle and two small bottles. the electronic game 20 questions. mp3 w/ headphones. deoderant. small flashlight. random bracelets. ring. bobby pins. small germ-x bottle. cuticle cream. co bigelow lip gloss in ultra mentha lip shine. vera wang princess lotion. paris hilton perfume–hate her… LOVE her perfume ha. kleenex. flash drive. stress ball. love my lips lip color. icebreakers pomegranete lemon mints. pomegranete body spray- small bottle. tea bags–wrapped of course. extra gum in polar ice.

  13. Michelle M says:
    Sun, 22nd Nov 200910:24 am 

    It depends on which purse, but in the bigger one the kitchen sink lol, and the smaller ones I usually throw some lipstick,mascara, and some cash. Depends on the situations.

    Handbags

Tell us what you're thinking...