Seemed Like A Good Idea At the Time: Drunk Food

By K

I was the only roommate who had gone out that night, and there was evidence that I didn’t come home alone.

There had been a 4 AM pizza purchase, the only remnant being the box. Maybe a crumb or two. And my purse sitting next to the mess.

On weekends, the diet gets thrown aside and I accept that I am weak. I’m what is described in Mean Girls as one of the “girls who eat their feelings.” Unfortunately, with college, the feeling that got a significant amount of play was “tipsy”, and with said buzz came a slew of delicious calories I’d only remember halfway into the next day.

The biggest regret of the drinking was (almost always) what I’d eaten. I try to justify the binge eating by saying it’s a far better alternative to, say, waking up next to a random.

When I’m coming home from the bar, it’s as though any self control I’ve ever had is on vacation and any restaurant open after last call is a free-for-all. You come home, and you have just enough energy to stay up for a bit, long enough for a slice or an order of nachos. You wake up realizing that you’ve blown through your budget of saved calories and your skinny jeans are going to stay in their drawer a little longer than expected.

So to prevent post-bar disasters, here are a few tricks that can help keep you in check:

1) Eat before going out. Gasp. Sometimes you have to state the obvious. By having something that satisfies you before going out not only will help you handle those drinks better, but it’ll keep you sated throughout the evening and you’re less likely to be starving late-night.

2) Don’t drink. Or set yourself a limit. Set up your own either/or policy, and prioritize whether you prefer a late-night snack or drinks at the bar/party/whatever. You may just learn that you don’t have to drink yourself senseless to have a great evening.

3) What has helped me in the past and usually does still is to assign myself a Jiminy Cricket-style conscience. If you’re out with friends, and they’re good friends, let them know that you need inspiration not to binge eat. No, it’s not their job to keep you in line, but a friend in need can use all the help she can get. You can entice them to do this by asking which is worse, their telling you ‘no’ when you ask to get French fries, or hearing you whine about them with regret for the entire next day.

4) Try drinking water at the bar (I am a huge fan of seltzer, as previously stated. The bubbles really do it for me.). It’s a filler and will help ease the headache the next morning.

5) Bring a buddy. If the binge is inevitable, don’t go down alone. Split something and it’ll save you half the calories.