She Took My Identity: A BFF Steals My Inviduality

March 22, 2008     Posted in Reality

72467_01_272w.jpgSingle White Female was a creepy film for a reason. If you haven’t been fortunate enough to see such a classic, then you perhaps you wouldn’t be able to see the signs of IDENTITY THEFT when a “friend” suddenly becomes a mime.


By CC Staff

It’s natural for friends to take on certain personality traits from spending so much time together. Similar phrases are shared, personal style melds and becomes less personal, and dislikes are much more likable if your BFF sings its praises and persuades you unwittingly while doing so. Those things are natural.

So when I complained about having my personality hijacked by a close friend, a much more forgiving friend advised that, “Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.”

Well, I think that’s bullsh*t.

Imitation is scary and frankly, quite annoying. Buying the same bag, not a big deal. Asking where I purchased my shoes (which, yes, are AMAZING) totally understandable–I was just lucky enough to find them first. Saying “word” just like me every time I mean to say “yes”, understandable (yes is overrated). Getting my same hair cut (bangs included) after saying you’d never be able to pull it off, IS ANNOYING. Plagiarizing entire paragraphs of my stories, my jokes and my soul, is just straight vexatious.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

Whether it’s insecurity or admiration, being anyone other than yourself is a pointless activity. You do “you” best. So be who you are, adore and cherish your friends qualities, adapt what you learn from them and make it your own. Share with each other but don’t become each other, or you’ll never know all of the great things you already possess, that are possess-able.

[Been in relationship with a copy cat? Do tell!]

4 Comments on "She Took My Identity: A BFF Steals My Inviduality"

  1. Samantha says:
    Tue, 25th Mar 20085:33 am 

    I have the exact same problem with my roommate!

    I stopped eating red meat, so did she.

    I started listening to different styles of music, she decided all of my new favorite bands were her favorite bands.

    My favorite holiday is St. Patrick's Day, she decides it's hers as well.

    …SAINT PATRICK'S DAY! And she isn't even Irish. *sigh*

  2. ASD says:
    Sun, 31st May 20092:25 am 

    I also have the same problem. And it is totally getting into my nerves. Same clothes, circle of friends, jokes. argh!

  3. Leyla says:
    Sun, 19th Jul 200910:25 am 

    I have the EXACT same problem with my friend and roommate. I got very irritated with her at first, but then I tried to stop becoming annoyed by telling myself that it was ok (and that I should actually view this as a compliment).

    But I just couldn't get over it! I realized that the reason it bothers all of us is because the other person is stealing a part of you THAT SHOULD NOT BE STOLEN! They're taking away something that you worked very hard to build-your personality-and you can't get back. That's the worst part. And it's stupid, because your life experiences and struggles went into making your personality, so what right does anyone else have to take that away from you? And what can you even say about it?

    I know she thinks I'm really strong and unique, but that's how I want to remain-unique! I want her to stop imitating my sarcasm. I want her to stop mimicking my independent streak. I want her to stop repeating things I say and taking my opinions on certain issues (like drinking and sex) to be her own. The funniest part is when she'll take things I say, and regurgitate them back to me as if they were her ideas in the first place!

  4. Angry friend says:
    Tue, 6th Mar 201210:06 am 

    Oh Good god yes! I had a friend who was like that. Who still is- just that I walked out of the relationship. Just like that. it was too much to take. She bought the exact same saree i had! She talks the way I do. She likes the same kind of music now! She also Walks like me- she even eats the same things I eat! *retches*
    I am generally a conflict-hater and a forgiver- but THIS was way too much even for me. So one fine day I just stopped talking to her. She stole my catchphrase- she stole my signature style! God I hate her- and the worst part is she thinks she KNOWS me better than myself. No, she doesn't, if she had any clue about me she would be running everywhich way because I plan to murder her!
    And oh! thank you for the post! so relieving! :)
    And good day to everybody!!

Tell us what you're thinking...