Serial-Killing Grannies Are Coming For YOU

Two old women from L.A. apparently had a really unusual, really twisted idea of how to fund their retirement (and, as it turns out, youth-preserving plastic surgery): Murder homeless men.

Here’s how it would go. They would befriend some poor homeless guy, put him up in an apartment, and get him to sign a life insurance policy listing them as the beneficiaries. After waiting a couple of years (as an immediate death would raise the insurance company’s suspicions), they would drug him senseless, run him over with a car that — presumably — would not be traced back to them, and claim the payouts.

Helen Golay and Olga Rutterschmidt evidently did exactly this in 1999, and got away with it. Then they did it again in 2005 and got caught. Even weirder — both women are in their 70s! These are serial-killing grannies we’re talking about!

Serial-killing grannies with expensive habits, evidently: A letter from Helen to Olga talks about Helen’s plastic surgery (at age 72!) and how painful it was. Since this letter was written in 2002, it was probably the first man’s murder that paid for said plastic surgery. Morbid to think about it, isn’t it?

The article in the Washington Post talks about how the story is just like something out of Arsenic and Old Lace, except without Cary Grant. That was before my time, but the point of the comparison transcends generation: This sounds like something out of a really twisted movie.

Actually, that’s a great idea for Helen and Olga’s next ‘rocking chair fund’ (or ‘get out of jail fund,’ as the case may be): selling the movie rights to their story!