The Top Five Women I’d Switch Teams For

5. Monica Bellucci

If you have seen this woman, then I really don’t need to explain myself. In her mid-forties, she could kick almost any ingenue’s boney little ass with the sheer force of her heavy-lidded sexuality. She could probably snap Keira Knightley in half with a glance.

4. Kristen Bell

Usually I like my women with a little more meat on them, but Bell is just so damn cute and sassy that I can make an exception. She’s a master of comic timing, a self proclaimed “nerd”, and was named one of the world’s sexiest vegetarians in 2006. Also, Veronica Mars.

3. Gillian Anderson

Any actress voted “Most Likely to Be Arrested” and “Most Bizarre Girl” in her graduating class is alright in my book. Her level of badass is compounded, however, by being the star of one of the best television shows of all time, The X-Files. That her real personality and on screen persona are obviously so different just speaks to her range and ability as an actress. Also, she’s just generally amazing looking. How could you not love this woman?

2. Eva Green

This former bond girl is shrouded in a Gallic mystery that’s made her a wildly sought after actress after only having appeared in five movies (only two of them good). Also, she knows, better than any actress today, IMHO, how to sport the red lipstick. It just so happens that People Magazine has named her the World’s Worst Dresser. Obviously, People Magazine’s level of class is not to be questioned–just look at the cover of their Best/Worst Dressed issue. Anyway, the way she dresses is one of the things I like best about her. Like Chloe Sevigny, she’s not afraid to be odd and express her oddness through fashion. I‘m all for Eva being herself, pink frilly kimono and all.

1. Rosario Dawson

She might be the perfect woman, with a killer combination of brains, bod, beauty and balls. Not only do I appreciate how perfect looking she is, more than anything she appeals to my inner geek. She’s sexy and frisky but she’s not afraid to get down and dirty in films like The Devil’s Rejects, Grindhouse and Sin City. At the same time, she can hold her own in lighter fare like Clerks II (which she was persuaded to do with the inclusion of the infamous donkey show scene).

Also, the woman has created her own comic book. How badass is that?

[Got your own lady crush you'd switch for? Let us know!]