“First Impressions Are Everything” The Bachelorette Season Premiere

The Bachelorette returned last night with a two-hour premiere.

By CC Staff

Our bachleorette is 26-year-old Real-estate agent, and (as host Chris Harrison reminds us) America’s sweetheart DeAnna Pappas. After she was left heartbroken by former Season 11 Bachelor Brad Womack, Deanna is optimistic about finding her true love among a mansion full of suitors.

Tonight the Bachelorette had the difficult but enviable task of getting to know 25 attractive men. The guys had different strategies and some proved more successful than others in winning this Southern Belle’s heart. Some did their homework, others tried seducing DeAnna with their chiseled physiques and spiky hair, some did outlandish things (really Paul? Jumping in a chilly pool?) while others were shy and quiet, so quiet they were introduced and we never heard from them again.

After some soul searching and pensive gazes into the camera, DeAnna emerged with her final 15 suitors. Here are my standouts.

Richard: He gave her a Herkimer diamond, and he seems sincere. Plus he’s a teacher, so I’m hoping he’ll keep it classy and not get into too much drama with the other contestants since his students will inevitably be tuning in.

Graham: DeAnna said his looks are just her type, plus they were both bartenders. What’s pushing Graham over the top? He is starting a non-profit organization. Swoon!

Fred: He’s a classic Midwestern gentleman. He didn’t get handfuls of air time tonight but his humor and genuine nature will keep him in the competition.

Jeremy: As of yet, the only thing they seem to have in common is their Greek background. But he’s handsome and charming, so he may be able to parlay that initial connection into something more.

And these guys earned my Worst Impression Roses for the night.

Sean: This martial arts expert from Kentucky is a Billy Ray Cyrus doppleganger with a crappy personality. He confused Robin Hood with William Tell and kicked a lemon off of poor Jesse’s head. I’m surprised this guy wasn’t trying to teach her the art of Rex Kwon Do. In any other first date situation, DeAnna would call the cops. On this show, she gives him a rose and lets him live with her.

Ron: Having a sole patch is cause for immediate dismissal from the mansion. Owning a place called Sole Patch Barbershop earns you a spot in the douchebag hall of fame.

So we’re 10 guys down and 14 to go. I think Jason, the single dad from Washington, is going to win DeAnna’s heart. He seems like an earnest guy with a good character. But then again, the game’s just begun. What did you think of the suitors? Who are your favorites? Who made the best first impression? And can we talk about DeAnna’s gown? Gor-ge-ous! Let ‘er rip in the comments.