Dear God No: Croc High Heels

June 10, 2008 - 3:30 pm By Lauren - University of Michigan

crocs_cyprus_scarlet.jpgI don’t know when or why it happened, but some time in the last few years people started popping up all over the place wearing orthopedic shoes. Brightly colored, rubber orthopedic shoes. And then they started sticking little decorations on them.

And then, gasp, I saw them being sold at Nordstrom.

Which is where I learned that the shoes were called Crocs and, despite being the most horrifically ugly footwear since the Moon Boot, they were very popular.

“They are so comfortable,” my 30-year-old brother said after I gagged when I saw him wearing them.

Since when does the entire world give up fashion for comfort? Seriously, my grandma wouldn’t even be caught dead in those things.

Well, the….er….masterminds behind the Croc heard my complaint. Sorta. They have been working feverishly to expand their product into the not-so-ugly market and have now done it with….

Wait for it….

The Croc High Heel.

I really didn’t think it could get any worse than the original, but, alas, I was wrong. I don’t care how comfortable these things are, I would rather walk home from the bar with 2 bloody stumps than even try these things on in stores.

If you know what is good for you (and fashion as a whole) you will not give in to the crazies over at Croc. No matter how high the heel or the comfort level.

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12 Comments on "Dear God No: Croc High Heels"

  1. Claire says:
    Tue, 10th Jun 200810:12 pm 

    Thank you! I get the craziest looks when I say I hate crocs. Yes, they are comfortable (I’ve only tried them on), but I would NEVER be caught dead wearing them. Blech!

  2. Olua - Washington College says:
    Tue, 10th Jun 200810:22 pm 

    *shoves her pair of crocs further beneath the desk and tries her best not to look tempted.*

  3. Christine says:
    Wed, 11th Jun 20088:48 am 

    Look wise, the heels look a hell of a lot better than the regular crocs. Will I get some? Hellll no.

  4. Laura says:
    Wed, 11th Jun 200811:52 am 

    I used to own crocs back when I was swimming competitively, before people started wearing them like crazy. In my opinion, the pool is the only practical place for these things. They are easy to wash, don’t slip off your feet like sandals, and keep your feet away from gross public pools.

    But in public? What’s the point? Why not just wear flip flops? Hello just as comfortable, and WAY less ridiculous looking! As far as these croc heels, they are about the most idiotic thing I have ever seen. The main excuse people give for wearing crocs is that they are “ohmygod so comfortable!” Heels aren’t comfortable. Even if they are made out of foam, they still put pressure on your toes. Point is: stop the madness.

  5. Michelle says:
    Wed, 11th Jun 20087:56 pm 

    HATE CROCS

  6. Kel says:
    Thu, 12th Jun 20081:57 pm 

    agreed. I would take the bloody stumps over crocs any day. high heel crocs is like polishing a turd.

  7. Lauren, University of Michigan says:
    Fri, 13th Jun 20088:55 am 

    Polishing a turd. Ha! That is amazing.

  8. Dawn says:
    Tue, 5th Aug 20088:21 am 

    Comming from a college campus, I think the bigger issue is uggs (why have they been around for 5 years when they should have never caught on in the first place) and Nike running shorts with leggings (why not wear real pants?!?!) oh, and sperry topsiders.

  9. Joelle says:
    Thu, 14th Aug 20082:19 am 

    haha I actually think I LOVE these things. I was also once a croc hater. A few years ago I was even in a facebook group “say no to crocs”. haha! Hey, I tried on these subbery things. they are super light and tually super comfortble. The silver and lilac color is pretty cool.

  10. Joelle says:
    Thu, 14th Aug 20082:22 am 

    *rubbery

    *actually super comfortable

  11. helen craven says:
    Sat, 21st Mar 20099:02 am 

    If you have ever had any foot surgery you will find crocs high heels are the only high heels you can now wear. They are a God send to me for I always wore attractive heels and now the crocs high heels are the only shoe rubber or not that I can wear and feel dressed up. Just wait after years of beautiful shoes you too will be excited about croc high heels.

  12. maria says:
    Fri, 21st Aug 200912:12 am 

    ive seen worse in puerto rico they have mary jane crocs with chunky heels!! just to make them more fashionable they put fake diamonds n shiny jewelry on them!! its the fashion in puerto rico so i was shicked to see them..they are the most fugliest things i have ever seen. i have pictures of them really ugly wit a capital U!!

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