Some people love “playing the field” but never getting serious.

Some just want a good relationship and “none of this bullsh*t” as they say.

As a guy, I can say that I would love to know ahead of time that things would work out or not. My best friend is also the only girl I’m interested in, so it poses a problem of the loss of friendship if one of us makes the first move.

Think on it,

The Fire Dragon: Horyuu

The dynamic changes if either party is only interested in sex. If a girl approaches a guy and he runs, then he probably only wanted to hookup and he got thrown off his game.

First – Anna is right. For two reasons: 1) when we chase things a bit, we focus more attention on them, which leads to us being preoccupied and wanting them more (think shiny objects and their effect on dilating pupils); and 2) when you’ve had a lot of random sex and you find someone you actually might care for, you want to treat that person differently and separate them from the other memories.

As for making the first move, three things:

1) the girl should always do it — but not at a bar and usually no more than a good look, turn, or twist of the hair. If I meet you at a bar, we’re fucking, not in a relationship.

2) guys who pick up on these signs at bars have done it before. which can really go either way for most people. watch for a subconscious increase in interest rather than a conscious acknowledgment of receiving your attention; those guys will either be clueless or sweet.

3) some of us are used to striking up conversations with people. this doesn’t mean we’re extroverted; perhaps we’re acting. we’ve done this before and you might be training material. um, watch out. but just so you know, we’re pretty amazing.

There’s a lot to be said for women making a strong first move. Lauren Bacall did it, and frankly there’s never been a more attractive woman. Plus, the strong move changes the relationship, making the attraction more open between partners. But there’s a difference between strong and easy, and much forwardness from girls falls among the latter. If you’re reading these articles for self-help, stick with being a gamine coquette with a wild smile.

Um, as for being a slut, I’ve slept with well over eighty women in the past two years alone (don’t keep track, but you should see my phone) and frequently am asked for my number; I’m also writing this from bed with a “gamine coquette” I picked up on the subway tonight while she was sitting with her friend — I hate to be crude, but just to get the point across, it’s time for shower sex now and then she’ll be leaving; this is me multi-tasking, not that she’s complained, and any shallowness of relationship has little to do with who made the “first” first-move, but rather how little we’ll have in common after she’s left.

I HATE the “game” and the “chase”. It’s so pointless and time-wasting.

The “She Said” girl is just what I’m looking for. A girl who doesn’t want to play games and do the “3 day rule” or just sit there and look pretty while rejecting advances from guys who she is attracted to but can’t act like she’s attracted to because she’ll come off too strong and then guys won’t be attracted to her.

WHEWW! See?? It’s exhausting just to READ it.

If you’re still stuck in the “men are the hunters” way of thinking then as a woman you should be a gatherer and stay home – barefoot and pregnant.

But things are not like that anymore (thank god).

In my 2 past relationships the girls made moves on me first…and our relationships were great! It showed that they had confidence (very sexy) and weren’t stuck in high-school dating mode.

GO GET ‘EM GIRLS!