DC Chief of Police, Mayor, and City Official React to Supreme Court’s Decision on Thursday

On Thursday the US Supreme Court struck down the D.C ban on handgun ownership as unconstitutional. It’s decision overruled 200+ years worth of lower court decisions that suggested that the intent of the amendment strictly concerned gun ownership in a citizens’ militia. The 1976 law prohibited handgun ownership and required that shotguns and rifles be kept unloaded and either disassembled or under a trigger lock.

The plaintiff in the case, Gillian St. Lawrence, a 29 year old residing in the posh neighborhood of Georgetown in Northwest DC, stated, “I’m thrilled… I’m finally going to be able to take the trigger lock off my shotgun and load it if I need to be able to defend myself in my own home”. It should be noted that the majority of murders occur on the opposite side of town—in the urban areas of Southeast and Northeast.

Last year there were 143 murders in DC and the thugs seem ready to beat that number this year. There have been 85 murders in DC so far this year. So let’s make it easier shall we? Hunting season is officially starting up once more in DC. Come one come all! (Your writer is a resident of DC). Read More »

During my vegetarian kick this winter, I was determined to get enough protein and, ironically, fat in my diet. Cheese was good, milk was fine, and I cannot say enough about my obsession with avocado, but what I needed was something of the nut variety to add a little to my meals. Peanut butter was the obvious choice.

It’s cheap and easy. It’s pre-made. It’s delicious. But I can’t eat the Jifs or the Skippys. They’re too sweet, no matter how choosy my mom is. In actuality, because my mom is diabetic, she was the one who considered them too sweet, and so, by default, I went natural.

Initially I was a little repulsed, because the peanut oil settles on top of the mashed-up peanuts themselves and it requires stirring, but I soon got over this. Contrary to popular belief, I’m not (quite) that lazy. The good news is, if you are that lazy, you can buy pre-mixed natural peanut butter; I just prefer the Smuckers glass jars of it. Essentially, I go through about a jar of this stuff every ten days, and I think you get the idea of how much I love it. Before you judge me for eating it out of the far with a spoon, I am going to share with you the amazing and different ways to enjoy your PB au Natural: Read More »

We all know that David Beckham is too. hot. for. words. And we wouldn’t turn down a romp in the sack with Brad Pitt, Will Smith or Jason Bateman. But, there is something to be said for the nerdy boys. They are sweet, smart and totally under-rated.

I have always held a soft-spot in my heart for the underdogs, and techy, nerdy boys are no exception. So, I am bringing to you the hottest nerds out there.

These boys give nerdery a verrry good name.

Read More »

Ah, those High School girls. We’ve either known them or been them; the girls who jump from best friend to best friend, from one fake friendship to the next, spilling their inner-most secrets, only to dish them out on various social networks as soon as their relationship inevitably fades.

The truth is though, even as we get older, leave high school behind, go to college and move on with our lives, those type of girls will always be there.

Seriously; I am 23 years old and know girls, to this day, that cannot leave the high school drama behind when it comes to growing up, getting over the past and creating lasting bonds with people that are real, genuine and sincere. High school was 5 years ago! Read More »

Being a sleepaway camp counselor is nothing like being a camper. If any of you forgot what camp is all about, let me give you a not-so-hypothetical situation:

You’re sitting on the side of the soccer field while the sun is drawing a tan line of your favorite flip flops on your feet. You’re at the front of the massage line (what could be better?) working on your latest pink and purple string friendship bracelet. The heat reminds you to bring your squeeze breeze to the next activity and you cannot wait for rest hour to play spit on your best friend’s top bunk, which, of course, you always win.

Since I arrived at camp, my daily activities have been slightly different. The campers have not arrived yet and my day has run a little something like this:

7:30 AM: Bugle call for wake up

8:00 AM: Breakfast (consisting of a choice of bagel, cereal, sometimes eggs , rarely bacon. Okay, not so bad) Read More »

I had a lot of nightmares as a kid. Thanks to these nightmares and various frightening films I’ve developed a hilarious set of OCD habits such as opening and closing closet doors before sleeping and checking behind the shower curtain before I saddle up to the toilet (you laugh but one day someone is gonna be in there and then who’s the dumb one!)

My imagination is easily inspired. For a while I couldn’t even watch a commercial for a horror movie because I knew those 30 seconds were enough to create an entire world of horrific fantasy that I’d be trapped inside for the rest of the evening. The one thing more unnerving then horror characters and sharks (I don’t swim in the ocean, at all, ever) is muppets.

Not all muppets, Kermit is fine, Fozzy, whatever. I’m talking about those LSD muppets that creators slip in films and TV shows, mixed with other cute, lovable creatures. They lure you in with Grover and then BAM, some abomination walks onto the screen that’s burned into your mind forever. Some horribly disfigured, warbly voiced monstrosity that may as well be drenched in blood, because thats how you’ll remember them, regardless.

Here’s five of the worst perpetrators. Read More »

As soon as summer announces itself with its warm winds and bright, shiny mornings, I want to lay out and bake in the sun. Nothing feels quite like floating in a pool – book in one hand, ice cold beverage in the other – absorbing those delicious rays. And nothing looks quite as good with almost every article of summer clothing than some nice, tan legs.

I am fully aware that skin cancer is scary business and not worth the fake-baking/laying out for hours on end. I also have a pretty healthy fear of getting wrinkley in the future, so, to protect myself, I wear my sunscreen. But I recently realized that maybe sunscreen wasn’t enough, and getting my glow a different way may be a better option.

I started investigating.

My former roommate loved sprays, but I personally don’t trust myself with them. I am mildly OCD and need a lotion to ensure I’m not missing anything. I went on a quest to find the perfect lotion and came across a new product: Jergens Natural Glow Express. It looked just like the rest, except that it claimedto show results in 3 days. Conveniently, I was heading on vacation in 3 days, so I grabbed it. Read More »

So, your Editors are still separated (but to be honest, they would probably do the IM thing if they were sitting next to each other). And one of them is experiencing “womanly problems”. It’s always good to have a girl in your corner when you want to complain about The Curse, because, let’s face it — it. sucks.

Read More »

When I am not out slutting it up, I tend to spend my evenings alone watching TV, reading books and – to relieve a little stress – playing out some super sexy scenarios in my head. I crawl into bed, get under the covers with my favorite toy and imagine myself in the place I’d rather be; the man I’d rather be with.

I find sexual fantasies to be both extremely liberating and enlightening. By opening myself up to any possibility – mostly things I would never do in the flesh – I learn a lot about myself and what turns me on. I can act out entire scenarios in my head and prepare myself for new situations that may arise sometime down the road. And, of course, I get to do something a little naughty with people I would never have the opportunity to be with in real life.

Like the dad of the kids I babysit for. I know that fantasy is as cliché as they come, but there is something so sexy and forbidden about that bond between babysitter and dad. He is sexy, smart, funny, and adorable with his kids. I know it’s so wrong, but I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to have him drive me home, kiss me, then take advantage of me in the back of his Mercedes. Read More »

People do a lot of things to prove their love for their favorite sports team. They paint their faces blue. They write letters on their stomaches and then flash the jumbotron at half time — in the middle of winter. They beat up other people who don’t feel the same about their favorite sports team. When it comes to dedication, sports fans truly understand the meaning of the word.

But I think this is taking dedication too far.

A 37-year-old Alabama middle-school teacher is being accused of sleeping with 8 members of her middle school’s baseball team. 8 members. All under the age of 17 years old.

Julie Pritchett was apparently already having an affair with one 15 year old boy on the team when she woke up and decided that one little boy wasn’t enough. She wanted 7 more! Because who isn’t into having their own little coven of teenage boys? It’s like Snow White! Except instead of dwarfs and singing animals, you get a possible 20 year jail sentence for being a sexual predator! Yay! Read More »