I (Really) Wanna Make Love In This Club

usher-2.jpgI can’t help it. Ever since I heard Usher’s not-so-new song, Love in This Club, I can’t help but want to…well…make love in this club. Any club, really. Not necessarily “this” one. Not that I have something against this one, but I like to keep my options open.

There is something so hot about the thought of meeting some guy – preferably one that looks like Usher – and being so into it that you can’t even wait to get home. You just gotta go to it. Right. There.

I don’t know if I’d be quite uninhibited enough to do it “on the couch, on the table, on the bar, or on the floor.” I know that Usher “don’t care who watching,” but, really? The bar? Isn’t that a teensy, tiny bit…public? Plus, I got thrown out of a bar last month for making out in front of the bartender; I can only imagine what the bartenders would have to say about me grabbing onto the beer taps in a fit of pleasure.

Maybe somewhere a bit more….secluded? Like a hallway? Or the kitchen? Once it’s closed, of course; no one wants that going on near their nachos. I’d consider the bathroom, except that I did try that once and it wasn’t too successful. There is always a giant line in the ladies’ room and the boys’ bathrooms are just too f-ing gross. Not to mention the fact that dudes at a urinal sorta ruin the mood.

Coat rooms are key. I would totally make love in the club in the coat room. Or behind the DJ booth. Right by the speakers. And the bass. (What? Did I go too far?)

Now, I just need to find someone make love (to) in this club. Someone that looks like Usher… or sorta does after a few shots.

[Delicious photo of Usher courtesy of streetknowledge.wordpress.com]



  1. Dana says:

    You know, I've often pondered the same thing. How DOES one "make love in this club"? I hope someone with a real life experience leaves a comment. Teach me, oh wise ones.

  2. Sebs says:

    there are many clubs that have more secluded chill out rooms with seats and such. they tend to be pretty dark. if you have a girl wearing a skirt sitting on your lap, you can get away with it with only a few people noticing. but people will notice. that's part of the point.

  3. Kelly says:

    Almost had that happen to me, however we ended up in his Tahoe in the parking lot. He wasn't Usher, but he was black (I'm white). By far the best sex I have ever had! So hot, it was crazy! We went back to the place he was staying at too beach town condo), kept it going that night and the morning afternoon. Think about him and it every time I hear that song.

  4. Carrie says:

    Kelly that is pretty disgusting. I have nothing against black people and I voted Democratic the one chance I got, but sleeping with a black guy is just gross. You really should have a little self respect. I imagine he is still bragging to all his friends about you and telling them what a 'ho' you were. Sad.

  5. Jake says:

    Carrie you worry me.

    I've always thought the 'make love in this club' lyric was a bit of an oxymoron – wouldn't club sex be alcohol fuelled, one night stand style sex for the thrill and gratification of it? Hardly making love, but that's just a technicality.

    I'd rather fuck in the club, far more befitting.


  6. Kelly says:

    Sleeping with a black guy is gross? I don't agree with you, but I respect your opinion. What exactly is the problem with it? I have been with a other black guys before and personally I think the experiences have been better than white guys. However, I have not dated one for any length of time, I've just preferred them for a get together here or there. I'm not sure if it is me, what I think about the sex and how it makes me feel, or if it is in fact better. Just my choice.

  7. kay says:

    The weird part about kelly's comment was the fact that she had to point out that he was black, like that was important/relevant. (Which it's not). I'm pretty sure Carrie was joking/being stupid.

    Anyways, whenever I hear this song, I think about how disgusting it would be to see two strangers having sex in a club. I like watching ME having sex, but 2 (most likely) unattractive strangers doing it in front of me?? Ewwwww…..I probably say this out of guilt though, cause I fucked in a bar once (out of sight of ANYONE though, in a back garden) It was hot, but we got kicked out….

  8. allyoueatiscookies says:

    hes talking about wanting to

    not actually doing it

  9. J - NYU says:

    having sex in a nyc club probably opens the door to SOO MANY diseases…

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