The Best of the Worst Pick-Up Lines

pick-up-lines.jpgFor some reason, all the men I encounter lately consider awkward to be the new hot thing in the art of pick-up lines. I’m not sure who these work on, or if they really do, ever, but something must be inspiring people to come up with gems like the following. Maybe it’s that crappy Pick Up Artist?

1.“You intimidate me because you’re [insert your ethnicity here].” Hi, try responding to that—when you’re clearly not interested—without sounding like a complete racist. I deserve a drink from the bartender just for being made to feel that uncomfortable, thanks.

2. “You look like you should be on that show So You Think You Can Dance.” Caveat here is, if you are not dancing in any way, shape, or form. I’m wearing shorts and 4-inch heels, these aren’t exactly my dancing shoes, but thanks?

3. “A girl like you should always have a guy next to her. Always.” Yes, I concur. To keep creepers like yourself from getting too close to me.

4. “You’re so [pick your most painfully obvious feature. Even if you're just average, imagine someone is saying that to you in a complimentary fashion.]” There’s a difference between being observant and having tact. I can see which one you picked…

I also enjoy the random men who offer life advice:

“If a man isn’t willing to rub your feet at the end of the day, get rid of him. You can do better than that.” This was legitimately thrown my way one night at a friend’s birthday party. I’m not even creative enough to dream this sh*t up. I mean, does this guy have a total foot fetish? Is he staring at my Gladiator-ed feet and getting a little….turned on?

I’m pretty attached to my pedicure place, actually. I get the sentiment, but I think I’m fine with general emotional attachment, flowers, dinner, etc. Foot massage is not a prerequisite of mine when choosing a boyfriend, or even a one-night stand.

Alright ladies, I know it’s not just me. What are some of the worst lines you’ve gotten lately?

[photo courtesy of cin1977's blog:]

8 Comments on "The Best of the Worst Pick-Up Lines"

  1. Don says:
    Mon, 7th Jul 200810:38 am 

    How about this one, which I’ve used:

    “Hey, you’re cute but skinny, would you like me to take you to the Olive Garden a few times and fatten you up?”

  2. Dorothy says:
    Mon, 7th Jul 200810:51 am 

    lol this one is my absolute favorite and it just happened saturday…

    “you have a perfect nose. Has anybody ever told you that before? Its like a perfect shape.”

    *good try though…solid effort lol jk

  3. Lauren, University of Michigan says:
    Mon, 7th Jul 200811:36 am 

    “You are that girl who wrote that article, “What do farts mean”!

  4. Theresa says:
    Tue, 8th Jul 200812:49 pm 

    From a non-filipino guy: “So you are filipino? Oh I know a lot of filipinos. Do you know my friend Dave from San Diego.”

    Mind you, he was picking me up at a bar in SAN FRANCISCO. Hello dimwit, not all Filipinos know each other.

    I get this A LOT!

  5. skm says:
    Tue, 8th Jul 20089:13 pm 

    “I could cum just looking at your body”

  6. a says:
    Tue, 15th Jul 20087:49 pm 

    him: “have you been smoking?”

    me: “what?”

    him: “have you been smoking? because you are smoking.”

  7. riss says:
    Wed, 16th Jul 20088:21 pm 

    “Did you know legs are the word of the day? So lets go in my car and spread the word.”

  8. gregory says:
    Tue, 16th Dec 200810:17 am 

    i want to meet and information about have sex

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