Reconnecting With the Ex: What a Terrible Idea.

July 13, 2008     Posted in Reality, Sex


By CC Staff

So I have a confession to make: Before reading your insightful comments on my, ‘Reconnecting With the Ex‘ post I did something stupid.

Like a mindless monkey, I welcomed the guy into my house. He greeted me with a bottle of wine. Nervously, we sat in my living room chit-chatting (both knowing in the back of our minds what could happen). He was trying to find a corner to sit in comfortably while I was painted the room. Awkward as humanly possible.

I wasn’t ready to give into him again. But, as always happens with alcohol always, my opinion was slightly different after a few glasses of wine. So, an empty bottle later, we were sprawled out on my couch, covered in paint, holding hands.

(Awww, cute, right? PUKE.)

I laid there wondering whether or not he was man enough yet to have sex. I mean, he did recently tell me that he regretted NOT having sex with me and that he would like to if I ever let him get that close to me again. Well, this was his golden opportunity.

And he took it.

Just to f*ck it up.

Without any emotions involved, we were soon lying under my covers making out. One thing lead to another, of course, and, finally, it was time to have sex…or not have sex. We started to (and by started, I mean, one second past the no-zone) and I said,

“Wait, we need a condom.”

I dug one up and when I came back to the bed, he simply could not perform. He blamed the condom; I blamed his gayness.

Last night, we had a talk about this condom issue and the truth behind why my ‘soul mate’ would never sleep with me before came trickling on out:

“I’d rather never have sex with you than try to with a condom.”

Yep.

And he meant it. He also told me that having sex with a condom is a ‘job’. He told me that he hates sex now (because of me). He made three, utterly invalid points to me that I’d love to share with you:

1. That oral sex without a condom is JUST as dangerous as regular sex without a condom.

2. That we both probably have tons of STDS that just haven’t shown up yet in tests, so it doesn’t matter

3. That since we already sort of started to have sex without a condom, that it’ll never matter now if we do or don’t.

I can’t even begin to detail how livid this condom issue – not only with him, but guys, in general – makes me. This is how diseases spread! Is a difference in sensitivity really worth contracting an STD? Or a child?! What is wrong with these guys that they think they’re so invincible? Or do they just not give a damn?

I’m infuriated. And, for the record, my ‘soul mate’ freaking BLOWS.

(photo from: mylifetime.com)

11 Comments on "Reconnecting With the Ex: What a Terrible Idea."

  1. Natalie says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20082:32 pm 

    Wow. You definitely dodged a bullet, then!

  2. Illuminati says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20082:47 pm 

    Holy crap that's crazy. He just watched you paint? What a jerk.

    Oh, yeah that other stuff is pretty bad too.

  3. Will says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20083:57 pm 

    That guy is a total loser. He's completely irresponsible.

  4. Bea says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20087:05 pm 

    You know, the issue *might* be that the guy really can't perform with a condom. Maybe it cuts off his circulation or something, and he's been embarrassed before when he tried to have sex with one. What he said–those stupid reasons–make me inclined to believe that he really thinks they are valid, but then again, he could have come up with those as a way to cover up his dysfunction issue. Maybe looking like an irresponsible prick seems better to him than admitting that he can't have sex with a condom on.

    Unlikely, but I thought I'd mention this thought.

  5. Michael says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20089:38 pm 

    You are sexy…Just feel curious. I saw your photos and profile at a black dating site called blackbbwmeet.com last week. Your many photos are found there. Is that you? What happened?

  6. jessi says:
    Sun, 13th Jul 20089:39 pm 

    Yes. It's silly to turn to EX. A friend of mine recommended me a very interesting place – "millionaireLover.Com" It's a site dedicated to wealthy/celebs and admirers!

  7. Dana says:
    Mon, 14th Jul 20087:06 am 

    Never date an ex! If he was dumb enough to let you go, be smart enough to say goodbye.

  8. Cully says:
    Mon, 14th Jul 20087:38 am 

    as guy, i'll probably be lambasted by the people who read my comment, but i intentionally seek out longer term monogamous relationship because i can't perform consistently when a rubber. I won't hide behind the insensitivity card, i'll hide behind the "Sorry, he just won't stay up for some reason" card. Without fail, as soon as one goes on, i become 10 degrees softer immediately. Condoms should be given out with viagra.

  9. K. J. Brown says:
    Wed, 23rd Jul 200811:49 am 

    Condoms don't feel too good anytime, but only due to not using the right kind usually. I found out I could fill out magnums after I could not find the brand that I had normally gotten (and always felt too contricting on me) at the store I was at one night. That EX sounds like he's being selfish and choosing to remain ignorant.

  10. gregory dykes says:
    Fri, 15th Aug 20085:33 pm 

    i want to meet you

  11. Bob says:
    Wed, 26th Nov 200812:16 pm 

    "And, for the record, my ’soul mate’ freaking BLOWS."

    That might be part of your problem, you know. ;-)

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