Comments on: Oversharing, Feminism, and the New American Twenty-Something http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/ Advice on student style, collegiate dating discussion guides, relationship advice and women's studies. Mon, 23 Nov 2009 22:45:35 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: gregory dykes http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7433 gregory dykes Mon, 18 Aug 2008 17:01:24 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7433 i want to meet you god send i want to meet you god send

]]> By: Belle http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7432 Belle Thu, 24 Jul 2008 05:06:47 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7432 Just to clarify, I was never saying that I thought it was a good idea for women to have sex with a cavalier attitude. I just don't think that expressing one's sexuality should be considered a bad or shallow thing. Just to clarify, I was never saying that I thought it was a good idea for women to have sex with a cavalier attitude. I just don’t think that expressing one’s sexuality should be considered a bad or shallow thing.

]]> By: Lauren, University of Michigan http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7431 Lauren, University of Michigan Mon, 21 Jul 2008 20:00:21 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7431 I don't have a problem with sharing the details of our lives online, but more with the fact that you can find out EVERYTHING about a person without actually meeting them. Where is the mystery? And is this really the best way to get to know/judge someone? I really miss discovering things about a person as I get to know them. Now, I just log on to the computer and know all there is to know (and so much more than I really needed). I don’t have a problem with sharing the details of our lives online, but more with the fact that you can find out EVERYTHING about a person without actually meeting them. Where is the mystery? And is this really the best way to get to know/judge someone? I really miss discovering things about a person as I get to know them. Now, I just log on to the computer and know all there is to know (and so much more than I really needed).

]]> By: Heather http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7430 Heather Sun, 20 Jul 2008 20:21:19 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7430 I dont think paris and lindsay are examples of how feminism has taken a step backwards. i think it can be seen in all women who name-call using the word slut, women who dont even see themselves as feminists despite the fact that all it really means is equality, and the fact that women arent as eager to stand up for their rights today (some, not all). the whole point of sex positive feminism is that sexuality is something to be embraced, and proud of. instead, the media uses these sexual images for the pleasure of men, or for aspirational aspects to try and get us to purchase products. the way we are represented, and the way we actually are, are two different things. we just need to remember, and keep in touch with how far weve really come in the past few decades, and understand that how we are portrayed in the media is a social obstacle to overcome, and has nothing to do with our own sexuality. I dont think paris and lindsay are examples of how feminism has taken a step backwards. i think it can be seen in all women who name-call using the word slut, women who dont even see themselves as feminists despite the fact that all it really means is equality, and the fact that women arent as eager to stand up for their rights today (some, not all). the whole point of sex positive feminism is that sexuality is something to be embraced, and proud of. instead, the media uses these sexual images for the pleasure of men, or for aspirational aspects to try and get us to purchase products. the way we are represented, and the way we actually are, are two different things. we just need to remember, and keep in touch with how far weve really come in the past few decades, and understand that how we are portrayed in the media is a social obstacle to overcome, and has nothing to do with our own sexuality.

]]> By: Casey http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7429 Casey Sun, 20 Jul 2008 03:54:16 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7429 well maybe you should reread my first sentance I was responding to Belle's comment and said that the point she brought up was not necessarily the case and gave my cituation as an example. Women in the 50's were supposed to have been behind their husbands decision making. They would make the decisions and make their man think that it was thier own idea. That's what their mothers taught them to do so no that's not my idea and I don't see how it has anything to do with stalking, sorry that statement offended you so much you flew off the handle with personal attacks (maybe you're the crazy stalker?) I certainly don't play games i was giving an example of how women were in past decades. and sorry my last statement could have been clearearer, I was trying to say wanting whatever you want whenever you want it is selfish, whether it's something sexual or anything else, it just says something about a girls personality that doesn't care who they sleep with just cause they're horny and "want it now". well maybe you should reread my first sentance I was responding to Belle’s comment and said that the point she brought up was not necessarily the case and gave my cituation as an example. Women in the 50’s were supposed to have been behind their husbands decision making. They would make the decisions and make their man think that it was thier own idea. That’s what their mothers taught them to do so no that’s not my idea and I don’t see how it has anything to do with stalking, sorry that statement offended you so much you flew off the handle with personal attacks (maybe you’re the crazy stalker?)

I certainly don’t play games i was giving an example of how women were in past decades. and sorry my last statement could have been clearearer, I was trying to say wanting whatever you want whenever you want it is selfish, whether it’s something sexual or anything else, it just says something about a girls personality that doesn’t care who they sleep with just cause they’re horny and “want it now”.

]]> By: Ginny http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7428 Ginny Sat, 19 Jul 2008 06:52:46 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7428 While I do not deny that standards (and double standards) exist, I don't see why they should matter. Unless you actually know the person how could you know the reasons for their sexual choices. They could be promiscous b/c they enjoy sex and like to experiment or b/c they have low self-esteem and don't value their bodies. Similarly, they could be chaste b/c they believe sex should always be emotionally meaningful or b/c they are repressed with an displaced guilt complex. I would feel uncomfortable having sex with someone with whom I wasn't in love, but I can only speak for myself and my background. It is purely wrong to pass judgment on something that should be personal choice. Casey, it seems like you made the wrong choice for yourself, but don't try to generalize about others. Also, what is this crap about "manipulating" men's minds? If you are striving for balance that is certainly not the way to achieve it. You sound like a crazy stalker. It's game-players like you that give honest women a bad name. As for your point about promiscuous women being selfish, you're doing some pretty strange reasoning. Exactly who should women be trying to please with their sexual habits? You? Society? I challenge you to find a sexual choice that wasn't self-oriented. While I do not deny that standards (and double standards) exist, I don’t see why they should matter. Unless you actually know the person how could you know the reasons for their sexual choices. They could be promiscous b/c they enjoy sex and like to experiment or b/c they have low self-esteem and don’t value their bodies. Similarly, they could be chaste b/c they believe sex should always be emotionally meaningful or b/c they are repressed with an displaced guilt complex. I would feel uncomfortable having sex with someone with whom I wasn’t in love, but I can only speak for myself and my background. It is purely wrong to pass judgment on something that should be personal choice. Casey, it seems like you made the wrong choice for yourself, but don’t try to generalize about others.

Also, what is this crap about “manipulating” men’s minds? If you are striving for balance that is certainly not the way to achieve it. You sound like a crazy stalker. It’s game-players like you that give honest women a bad name. As for your point about promiscuous women being selfish, you’re doing some pretty strange reasoning. Exactly who should women be trying to please with their sexual habits? You? Society? I challenge you to find a sexual choice that wasn’t self-oriented.

]]> By: Casey http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7427 Casey Sat, 19 Jul 2008 01:15:11 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7427 Having sex with whoever whenever, or not having it I should say, is not necessarily an issue of whether someone is confident or self-conscious or not. After high school I was pretty promiscuous sleeping with guy after guy and I felt like I was "liberated" and I didn't feel like a slut because, after all, it's ok for guys to do it so it should be ok for us to, right? well, I've since grown up and realized guys and girls are not the same (yes we are equal, but not the same) there are different standards for each sex, and having different standards doesn't make us unequal, there are things that put us above men and some things that put men above women but as long as it's balanced we're still equal (that's what we should be striving for is a balance, not the same standards) As women we have higher expectations then men, we're supposed to be the calm collective levelheaded ones (which todays women certainly are not) that are supposed to "manipulate" mens minds. But what man is going to allow themselves to be manipulated by a girl that whores around? none. By being "liberated" we're diminishing our respect, credibility, and influence. I look back on that part of my life and just feel trashy, dirty, ignorant, and immature. I like the feeling of being the girl a guy has to work for and not being the "easy target" just because I'm horny. Because even if you feel "liberated" sleeping with some guy you just met you are the only one that sees it that way. And there really is no justification other than you just don't care about your image and you want whatever whenever, which, I think there's a word for that, and it's selfish. Having sex with whoever whenever, or not having it I should say, is not necessarily an issue of whether someone is confident or self-conscious or not. After high school I was pretty promiscuous sleeping with guy after guy and I felt like I was “liberated” and I didn’t feel like a slut because, after all, it’s ok for guys to do it so it should be ok for us to, right? well, I’ve since grown up and realized guys and girls are not the same (yes we are equal, but not the same) there are different standards for each sex, and having different standards doesn’t make us unequal, there are things that put us above men and some things that put men above women but as long as it’s balanced we’re still equal (that’s what we should be striving for is a balance, not the same standards) As women we have higher expectations then men, we’re supposed to be the calm collective levelheaded ones (which todays women certainly are not) that are supposed to “manipulate” mens minds. But what man is going to allow themselves to be manipulated by a girl that whores around? none. By being “liberated” we’re diminishing our respect, credibility, and influence. I look back on that part of my life and just feel trashy, dirty, ignorant, and immature. I like the feeling of being the girl a guy has to work for and not being the “easy target” just because I’m horny. Because even if you feel “liberated” sleeping with some guy you just met you are the only one that sees it that way. And there really is no justification other than you just don’t care about your image and you want whatever whenever, which, I think there’s a word for that, and it’s selfish.

]]> By: Belle http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7426 Belle Fri, 18 Jul 2008 23:09:38 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7426 Stacey, I agree that every movement should be complex rather than single-issue, but what is wrong with sexuality? The fact that women can now make the choice to be sexual or chaste rather than being told what to do is amazing! Although I don't think I could be out there like some women, as long as they do it safely, I totally admire those women who have sex when they want and don't feel self-conscious about it. Judgmental girls are the ones that need to check themselves... Stacey, I agree that every movement should be complex rather than single-issue, but what is wrong with sexuality? The fact that women can now make the choice to be sexual or chaste rather than being told what to do is amazing! Although I don’t think I could be out there like some women, as long as they do it safely, I totally admire those women who have sex when they want and don’t feel self-conscious about it. Judgmental girls are the ones that need to check themselves…

]]> By: Ashlee http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7425 Ashlee Fri, 18 Jul 2008 21:00:28 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7425 I had to vote that I am proud of our image as women because their are many powerful and influential women that have been raising the bar. Everyone knows that Lindsey, Paris, Nicole, Britney and and that crowd are trash. They don't represent women in general they represent Hollywood. Thats a whole other subject that needs its own repercussions. Some women such as Hillary Clinton and Angelina Jolie are during good for our image. Not only that, I appreciate the image that blogs such as CC give women. We don't have to live by the standards that our grandmothers lived by. We can go to college, educate ourselves and do something great. I had to vote that I am proud of our image as women because their are many powerful and influential women that have been raising the bar. Everyone knows that Lindsey, Paris, Nicole, Britney and and that crowd are trash. They don’t represent women in general they represent Hollywood. Thats a whole other subject that needs its own repercussions. Some women such as Hillary Clinton and Angelina Jolie are during good for our image. Not only that, I appreciate the image that blogs such as CC give women. We don’t have to live by the standards that our grandmothers lived by. We can go to college, educate ourselves and do something great.

]]> By: Stacey http://collegecandy.com/2008/07/23/oversharing-feminism-and-the-new-american-twenty-something/#comment-7424 Stacey Fri, 18 Jul 2008 20:01:41 +0000 http://www.collegecandy.com/reality/10560#comment-7424 I have to admit, I think women have taken a step BACKWARD. What are we trying to say? That newwave feminism is based completely off of sexuality? Because that's how it's portrayed these days. It's sad to me, honestly. I have to admit, I think women have taken a step BACKWARD. What are we trying to say? That newwave feminism is based completely off of sexuality?

Because that’s how it’s portrayed these days.

It’s sad to me, honestly.

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