The Top 5 Dave Matthews Songs Your Ex Ruined

July 31, 2008 2:30 pm     Posted in HaHa  K - NYU g+ page

dave_matthews.jpgI can’t explain what it is about Dave Matthews, but millions of college boys fall in love with him year after year. And so, by default, do the girls they date. I’m even pretty sure at about 40% of the country’s universities, you can’t even apply unless you’ve been to or intend to attend a Dave Matthews show, because he’s so “f*ckin unbelievable live.” Right? Riiiight.


By K

I admit, I’ve been. It’s an amazing live show, it really is. That and the contact high you can get on the walk from the parking lot to the amphitheater is sick. But no, boys definitely love the Dave, and when you date one, you learn to love (or tolerate, or pay to see) him too. The odds are not in your favor–you will learn to deal.

I personally was never into Dave Matthews until I dated his stalker, a guy who had been to over 30 shows around the country, owned every album, some memorabilia…you get the idea. He had a man-crush on Dave. So, I tried to appreciate instead of judging him as a little weird (error in judgment number one). I downloaded more Dave than my own iPod could handle, I think at one point a good sixth of my playlist was devoted to DMB. I took it even further and went to a few shows. Which were good, you know, until I attached memories of the guy to them. And then the relationship ended on an incredibly bad note. And I was left with the sappy croonings of Dave Matthews to remind me what a moron I’d been. Never again can I think about seeing him live (which is sooo fun if you tailgate) or throwing on a random mix to fall asleep to.

Dave had to go, and after removing him from my iPod (but not my iTunes, should I lapse), I was safe. Or so I thought.

The songs below will inevitably be played at the least opportune moment, after that beer you shouldn’t have had, when you know you’re going home alone, and when you’re more emotionally vulnerable than you’ve been in months. I have yet to meet a girl who isn’t reminded of some guy from her past by this man,and so have created a list of the top 5 worst Dave songs to ever come on after a break up.

In no particular order, these always bring back painful memories and make you wish you never had the ex burn you a Dave Matthews mix:

1)Crash. I’d end it now by saying the entire album, but that’s no fun. When your relationship was at its best this is the song you’d listen to and think happy little love thoughts. And now when I hear it, I cringe and retch a little.

2)Two-Step. “Celebrate we will, because life is short but sweet for certain…” And so was that relationship. Only replace “sweet” with bitter and painful, or any other adjectives that remind you of how that experience ended. Plus there’s ALWAYS some dumb drunk frat boy screaming “TWO STEP!” on the lawn at the summer shows, convinced that Dave can hear him and will honor the request, just all-around bad news.

3) Satellite. Ooof, this was my FAVORITE Dave song. He played this at my first ever concert of four I went to, and it was a perfect night, at the beginning of a perfect summer romance… I remember road trips and heart-to-hearts about feelings caused by this song, and now it’s all just tainted. Cannot listen to it.

4) The Space Between. And now that’s all that’s left between you and your ex. Awesome. Bartender, can I get a shot of tequila? This one goes out to my best friend, scarred by a Dave groupie at an early age, who would likely prefer her own eardrums to explode than be put through memories associated with this song.

5)#41. “I wanted to stay, I wanted to play, I wanted to loooooooove youuuuuuu…” Need I say more? Can’t hear this without thinking, yes, wanted to love you, and want to know where the HELL I got that idea.

Any other Dave jams you just can’t take that didn’t make my top 5?

[photo courtesy of http://www.moonbattery.com

19 Comments on "The Top 5 Dave Matthews Songs Your Ex Ruined"

  1. amy says:
    Thu, 31st Jul 200810:13 am 

    OMG i went for a run last night (i just broke up with my bf a few weeks ago) and dave cam eon my ipod and i find myself inexplicably able to run 6miles!!! and the funny thing is i was thing about my old ex and how i shoulda known better with this one

  2. Theresa says:
    Thu, 31st Jul 20083:23 pm 

    Dream Girl – fantastic song, can still barely listen to it a year and a half later

  3. Cassie says:
    Thu, 31st Jul 20089:40 pm 

    Fortunately I found DMB before I started dating and introduced it to my boyfriends, so I can still listen to all of his music. I don't know what I would do otherwise.

  4. Heather says:
    Fri, 1st Aug 20089:35 am 

    ive always wanted to go see dave live, and ive never considered myself to be that big a fan… i just hear such good things about his concerts that it makes me want to go.

  5. Sarah says:
    Fri, 1st Aug 20088:05 pm 

    dave went to my high school!! therefore he reminds me of high school. which in some cases could be even worse then ex's.

  6. emily says:
    Mon, 4th Aug 200812:46 pm 

    say goodbye… although the fact that it was that song that we both loved and listened to constantly together should have been a sign for me that i should have gotten out A LOT sooner.

  7. Talia says:
    Tue, 5th Aug 200811:09 am 

    I also discovered dave pre-BF and my current guy doesn't *like* "goon" "goon"thews band (his words). Unfortunately, the guy before last ruined some other good music for me, mostly out of some strange illness guys get… the one where they think they can play the guitar and that you'd actually want to hear it? Yeah, that disease never quite goes away, does it? R.I.P. Guster, Dispatch etc.

    I'm also someone who likes dave matthews -band, his latest stuff, go figure.

  8. Matt says:
    Tue, 5th Aug 200812:22 pm 

    This is an interesting list, but pales in comparison to the amount of songs the Dave Matthew's Band, themselves, have ruined.

  9. lauren says:
    Thu, 7th Aug 20087:30 pm 

    OHMYGOD. so so so true. it was my ex-boyfriend who actually got me into dave matthews. he could play all those top songs on the guitar, especially crash, of course. he used to play them all for me and it would just make my heart melt everytime. once he dumped me, i couldn't listen to any of those songs ever again. every time they come up on shuffle, i always skip over them. i'm not in love with my ex anymore, but he caused me enough pain to stop listening to one of the greatest bands of all time. gahh, fuck you joe.

  10. Natalie says:
    Sat, 9th Aug 20088:29 am 

    halloween,

    My ex played it for me on our first date because who doesn't want to hear the words "LOVE IS HELL!!" shrieked at them on theri first date "awww"- this should have been an indicator of how the relationship was gonna go.

  11. Ashleigh says:
    Sat, 9th Aug 20089:09 am 

    Oh – Dave Matthews, also.

    Both Crash, & The Space Between remind me of Matthew, & they are tainted. =/ i still listen to them at times though, because i never want to forget my first love. /: sad thoughts

    Isn't it funny when however break-ups occur, another Dave Matthews song is ruined?! lol.

  12. lilbabyface says:
    Mon, 11th Aug 20087:16 am 

    Dave is brilliant, and yes I can relate to all of the above…and yes, I must admit Crash was my ex's favourite and became my favourite. However, we've now become friends again but I've never let go of DMB….

    my question to sarah: Dave went to an all-boys High School in South Africa…are you sure you're talking about the right Dave?

  13. SomeAudioGuy says:
    Mon, 11th Aug 200811:03 am 

    Yup Two Step is forever ruined.

    Quite possibly one of the most hauntingly romantic songs ever written, perfectly showcasing the excitement, danger, and vulnerability of a relationship.

    Blond tart ruined it forever…

  14. Yada Yada says:
    Wed, 20th Aug 200810:09 am 

    Lilbabyface, actually St. Stithians has a girls prepatory school too…just to let ya know.

  15. Chris says:
    Fri, 5th Sep 20086:36 am 

    Crush is by far my favorite DMB song, and definitely a love song. i would have thought that that would have made the list. I guess I dont think like yall haha.

    Best of Whats Around also has some love song lyrics if you listen. Personally I could never let an ex-gf kill music for me and i hope Ive never done that for someone (but I did bring my ex onto DMB, so I might have…..)

    Sorry girls

  16. Rose says:
    Thu, 20th Nov 200810:14 pm 

    Oh my god, I nearly died laughing when I read this. The guy I am head over heels for right now…obsessed with DMB. I don't even think the term man-crush would suffice to show how he feels about Dave. He's been to at least 25 shows. Obviously, he has yet to ruin any Dave songs for me, but I have always been a Pearl Jam fan…and I will murder him if he ruins Eddie for me.

    BTW, Crush should definitely be on this list. LOVE the violin solo, especially.

  17. Jess says:
    Sat, 14th Feb 20098:31 pm 

    OMG. you just described my life. My break up songs are different.. but im forcing myself to just keep listening they dont remind me anymore.. so far so good. haha

    and talia: wordd to that illness, they should make some medication or something.

  18. Rightsizename says:
    Fri, 20th May 20113:15 pm 

    #41. “I wanted to stay, I wanted to play, I wanted to loooooooove youuuuuuu…” Need I say more? Can’t hear this without thinking, yes, wanted to love you, and want to know where the HELL I got that idea….effin hilarious.

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