That’s right. In a huge attempt to be relavant and completely go against his previous accusations against Obama for having little to no experience, McCain has just announced that his Vice President will be none other than Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin. Palin is 44, has “former beauty queen” on her resume, has only been the governor for two years, and recently gave birth to her 5th child in April.
God knows how she’s going to be VP with 5 kids. One time I babysat 5 kids and couldn’t even pee without someone shoving a crayon in someone else’s eye, let alone help lead a country.
Perhaps Palin’s daily schedule will look a little something like this:
5:30AM: change diapers, wipe poop off of hands to read daily briefing, breast feed
6:30AM: feed and burp children, wipe baby puke off her Talbot’s dress, tell children to “stop playing with mommie’s pearls!”
10:30AM: get to office, notice wayward baby throw-up on shoe, talk to advisers
12:30PM: eat a healthy lunch, read some more briefings, try to catch a half hour of TiVoed “Oprah”
3:30PM: get a call from a nanny that someone hit someone over the head with a pot. Explain to nanny that “if no one is bleeding, then it’s fine, and just use the time-out corner.”
6:00PM: arrive home exhausted. Suddenly realize there are 20 hands grabbing at pantsuit, breast feed
8:30PM: use a small army to get everyone in bed. Read stories about a magical land called Washington and a big castle called The White House.
10:00PM: break open the liquor cabinet, watch the end of “Oprah”, spy what may or may not be baby poop on the rug.
Here’s hoping Palin has what it takes to be both a mom to her kids and a caretaker to McCain…