The Hills Goes Bicoastal

Whew! Tonight’s episode of The Hills really wiped me out. Between all that bicoastal travel and those beers I had at my Labor Day BBQ, I was tired. Although it may also have to due with my lingering hangover from Saturday’s festivities.

By Lauren

But I digress.

It seems as though with every passing episode of The Hills I find myself hating someone else. First it was Spencer (duh), then Heidi (double duh), then Jen Bunny, Lauren and, naturally, Lo. Well, another one bites the dust: Whitney.

Don’t get me wrong – Whitney is awesome. She is nice, smart, driven and has a killer wardrobe. But the fact that she gets to travel between L.A. and NYC dressing hot guys for model casting calls just makes me want to scream. Why her?! Why not me?! That girl must have some sort of magical spell on Kelly Cutrone; she made the woman smile!

And it was scary.

While Whit was off playing Dress the Hottie on the East Coast, LC was back in L.A. trying to break things off with Doug. I don’t really know why you’d break up with a guy who looks that good (considering the guy she really loves wears camo…), but I do have to commend her on actually sitting down and breaking things off. I tend to stick to the “avoid him until he gets it” tactic, so it was admirable– while totally awkward – that she went to his place to give him the news.

So, Ms. LC is back on the market, boys. If you want to date a bland piece of tofu (which is totally worth it considering you could make at least $10,000 an episode) get to L.A. now! You could be her newest Brody. Or Doug. Or Stephen Coletti.

When Lauren wasn’t breaking things off with Douglas she was spending her time debating the difference between a hamster and a guinea pig with her BFF, Stephanie. They even have bracelets! Who cares if no one else trusts her? Who cares if she tells LC one thing and then goes right over the Spencer and says something completely different? She has evil Pratt blood in her, but that doesn’t mean she’s evil.

Right?

I mean, we sorta saw Heidi Montag eat, so anything is possible.

The good news is we won’t have to wait as long as normal to find out what happens next. There is going to be a special bonus epidsode of The Hills next Sunday at 7:30! The Hills AND the VMA’s? Be still my heart.