5 College Life-Savers

September 12, 2008     Posted in Back to School, Reality

Now that you’re in college, people are no doubt bombarding you with their own lists of things you just HAVE to have to survive in the Narnia they call dorm-land. Some people are right on the mark with their suggestions, while grandma is entirely mistaken with her devotion to the fly swatter. Take whatever tips you want, but here are some items that definitely did save my life in college.

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1. A TAPESTRY

I know it sounds silly, but when my boyfriend and I needed privacy in my bunk, that little tapestry I’d brought was such a life saver. We just hung it up over some yarn and had our own little curtain for the bed. And then we made out in between talks of our future — that never happened — in privacy.

2. BROWNIE MIX

Smoking weed at college, should you be so illegally inclined, is a little harder than it should be. Sure, sure, it’s easy enough outside of the dorms. But when you’re in the dorms, it can be a pain in the butt. From dismantling fire alarms to trying to carefully smoke out the window while lighting incense, it’s hardly worth it. In fact, one of my besties got arrested for it her freshman year!

Instead, just learn to bake. If you need your weed fix, throw it in a brownie mix and surprise your hallmates with something awesome…and you’ll totally get away with it, too.

3. FLIP-FLOPS

I have (unfortunately) experienced Athlete’s Foot before…and it blows! Make sure you have some good water-resistant flip-flops for the showers and always wear them when you’re showering! Believe me, nothing is worth Athlete’s Foot.

4. HEADPHONES

Whether your roomie won’t quit blasting her Michael Jackson at 8am like my first roomie did (and nothing against the king of pop or anything, but it just sucks to hear Billie Jean every freakin’ morning…) or your roomie won’t quit it with the obnoxious sex right next to you, headphones will come in handy. You’ll learn how to fall asleep cuddled up next to your ipod like it’s your job (even though I kinda doubt you’ll ever get paid for it).

5. GREASY FOOD

I don’t care what anyone says — greasy food is the ultimate cure for a hangover. You get hangovers in college and there isn’t anything better in the morning after one of those nights out than a Bacon/Egg/Cheese Croissant. Period.

Take it or leave it, but these 5 items were life savers for me.

10 Comments on "5 College Life-Savers"
  1. Laura says:
    Fri, 12th Sep 200812:45 pm 

    Greasy food can be a savior and a curse, depending on what it is and how bad the hangover is. Sometimes all of that protein and carbs really helps me wake up and feel much more alert.

    Other times, though, all of that grease….well lets just says it definitely slides right through. That coupled with the always awesome alcohol-related diarrhea makes it soo not worth the few delicious moments of bliss. Ewww.

    One thing I realized I couldn't live without: TOMATO JUICE. Seriously, hands-down the best thing. Alway keep some in the fridge, and if you have the other ingredients you can use it to make Bloody Marys in the morning, which is the only thing I've found that tops plain tomato juice for hangover cures.

  2. Dana Nicole says:
    Fri, 12th Sep 20083:51 pm 

    YES BROWNIES

  3. Kay says:
    Fri, 12th Sep 20082:45 pm 

    You can't just "throw" weed in to brownies. You need to grind it, cook it in some oil and then strain that (usually) before adding it. If not, you end up with brownies that are both gross and useless for getting high.

    Just make delicious plain brownies if you're unsure how to do the weed version. They're almost as good a high.

  4. Tyler says:
    Fri, 12th Sep 20087:15 pm 

    Don't forget that while making the oil for brownies, there is still a very strong smell.

  5. J Rock says:
    Fri, 26th Sep 200811:50 am 

    It was easy for me to find Tapestry for my dorm

  6. Tera says:
    Sat, 29th Aug 20094:27 pm 

    Why do people insist on writing articles about things they don't know shit about?

    Like Kay said, you can't just "throw it in a brownie mix." Like Tyler said, making weed brownies produces a HUGE SMELL.

    You're right, it's not worth it to fuck around with fire alarms and try to smoke in the dorm. It would be infinitely harder to get away making weed brownies.

    Guys, just go the hell outside.

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