Go To The Store, Buy a Hat, and Hold the Eff Onto It: House Rejects Bailout, Stock Market Tumbles

Okay…so…don’t start screaming or anything, but this afternoon the House rejected Bush’s bailout plan and the Dow tumbled 705 points.

According to CNN.com, “Although another version of the plan will likely go before Congress, investors are concerned that passing the bill could be a more drawn-out process.”

Even though we recently interviewed an economically savvy insider, we’re still doing our best to keep from climbing out of our chairs and curling into the fetal position underneath our desks. While none of us in the CC office have enough money in the bank to worry that it won’t be insured, or enough money in the stock market to consider jumping out the window, we can’t help but worry that something drastic is happening.

But even though we are scared (and may or may not have consumed a large milkshake…out of FEAR) we do know what everyone should do to prevent a complete economic collapse/major emotional breakdown:

1. You should keep your money where it is. Do not take all that money out of the bank and store it in your Yaffa blocks; no matter how bad things get, that tiny lock on your dorm room door is still not a safer option.

2.  You should not freak out yet. Do not stop shopping, do not sell your stocks, do not head to the nearest Costco and stock up on canned tuna. Just keep living like you’re living. It’s when people stop doin’ their thing that the real economic sh*t hits the fan.

3. You should drink. Heavily. Go dancing, have a good time, then stimulate the economy buy loading up on pizza and breadsticks late night.