The Project Runway Rundown: Missing Tulle is the Least of Kenley’s Problems

I never really thought about it before, but being a member of any reality show for an extended period has to make you go crazy. All that competition, all those cameras, all that drama…

And tonight it seems the pressure has finally gotten to Jerell. The dude hit the crazy wall and kept on running. I mean he was talking to fruit and syrup. And he wore a shirt so low that I kept seeing his nips. And that straw hat? What is with him and the hats? Is he channeling Justin Bobby?

But Jerell isn’t the only one goin’ batsh*t insane; it seems that I may be going crazy myself. For a brief moment I actually felt bad for Kenley. No, not because she left her tulle or because her dress looked like something that was more appropriate for the Drag Challenge; I felt bad cuz the girl is an outsider (and I always feel bad for outsiders!).

The poor girl grew up on a tugboat. It’s not her fault she’s a disrespectful and arrogant bitch; whom has she ever interacted with besides a bunch of seamen?

But don’t worry; as soon as that biatch started talkin’ sh*t about the other designers I turned off my feelings and moved on. She sucks and I couldn’t wait to see what the judges thought of her scaley stripper dress.

The challenge on tonight’s episode was to take inspiration from some flowers in the NY Botanical Garden and make a gown. It seemed easy enough, but everyone seemed to jack it up on the runway.

But while the dresses were meh (besides Jerell’s – his was pretty fab) the drama was THE BOMB. I couldn’t tell if they were in a boxing ring or on a runway. It was that good. First Kenley gets criticized (as she damn well should of with that monstrosity), to which she tries to put Heidi in her place. And what happens? A good ol’ verbal bitch slap courtesy of Nina Garcia, that’s what. Then, in one of the most cliché moves in reality TV, the judges asked everyone who they would take to Fashion Week.

And everyone left Kenley back in 1955.

Awwww daaaaaamn.

Sucks to be Kenley. Too bad the judges didn’t really listen to anyone and let all the designers go home to prep for the main event. Which is good, I guess, because my home girl Korto was also on the chopping block for her orange pageant dress and I totes have her pegged as the season winner.

And I guess I do sorta wanna see what kinda mess Kenley brings back to NY for the finale, because, unlike everyone else in the world, I haven’t peeked at the pics yet!

Can’t wait for next week. Go Korto, go!