Skip-It, Bitch: The 10 Best Things About Elementary School


With all the crazy sh*t happening in the world today, we here at CC can’t help but think back to the days when the biggest issue in our lives was whether our Mom had put our favorite over-sized T-shirt (with the Coke Bears on it!) in the laundry yet.

Yeah, we’re talking about Elementary School.

And maybe we’re not even talking about the Elementary School of today, because apparently kids are alergic to everything and on mood-altering drugs and having sex at 11. We’re talking about the Elementary School of our youth. Troll Dolls. New Kids On The Block (the first time). Side pony-tails. Dunkaroos. Life was so much fun back then — or at least our nostalgia tells us it was.

In honor of our childhoods, and because we are so. drained. from a week full of political and economic strife, we’ve decided to put together the 10 Best Things About Elementary School. Feel free to add your own happy memories in the comments…

10) Lunchables


Yeah. These things were really bad for us. They were full of chemicals and sugar. Refined and processed. But hot damn, were they good.

9) Cootie Catchers


How many of these could you make in thirty seconds? How many times did you actually believe with your heart and soul that Sean, who sat two desks over, was actually going to fall in love with you because the Cootie Catcher said so? P-U-R-P-L-E…

8 ) Homework That Included Coloring


Booyah. This was the sh*t, right up there with making dioramas out of shoe boxes. Color the 50 states? Sure. Color the different parts of the flower? WHY NOT? Nothing was better than lulling yourself into a zen-like state with coloring and calling it “work”.

7) Skip-It


One time, I Skipped-It around my entire block for an hour. Exercising has only gone downhill since…

6) Yoo-Hoo


Do they even sell this stuff anymore? It’s probably known to cause cancer now, but back in Elementary School, this drink was as valuable as pure crack cocaine from Colombia. You could bargain for anything with Yoo-Hoo, including your friend’s half-baked cookie from hot lunch.

5) Trapper Keepers


If people wouldn’t look at me weird, I would still be using my Lisa Frank trapper keeper from 5th grade. That bitch held everything, even pens. Plus, you could add all the cute kitten and Troll doll folders you wanted to it and it would still close

4) Snap Bracelets


These things were outlawed in my school as soon as they arrived, but the potential to actually cut someone only made them cooler. If you sat in the back of the bus, you could watch boys having whipping contests with them — first one to shed a single tear loses.

3) Anything with Unicorns on it


Unicorns were hip in Elementary School. Especially if they had wings, or were painted in really bright colors. You could have Unicorns on your pens, notebooks, pencil cases, shirt…the list goes on. I can’t own anything with a Unicorn anymore, even though my love for them is still strong.

2) Sharkbites Fruit Snacks


Remember the white ones that tasted like all the colors combined? It was like an explosion in your mouth.

1) Recess


Tackling boys and throwing to the ground without worrying about restraining orders, getting “married” by the tire swing, testing the boundaries of your courage by kicking the tree with the bees in it; recess was pretty much the best thing the public school system ever did for us. I’ve never laughed so hard in my entire life than when I watched my friend Bobby try to jump off a swing, only to have his jacket get caught by the chain, and fly backwards like a rag doll 6 feet in the air. Oh man. Good times.



  1. Red says:

    My friend's freshman year roommate kept a stash of Yoo-hoo. We definitely teased him for it, but then drank them when he went home on vacation.

  2. beth says:

    OK– for one, I still use my lisa frank trapper keeper!! (I'm 23 but mentally 11!!- and I take it to work with me at the bank!) :) all my girl co-workers like to talk about theirs from when they were kids when they see it!

    As for the snap bracelets…I've graduated to snap Koozies :) seriously… it's like a giant slap bracelet for your bottle of beer… awesome!

  3. Mary says:

    oh how i long for these days again…

  4. C says:

    you can still get snap bracelets but big kid style…which translates to snap watches. There's actually some pretty nice ones. I have gotten quite a few compliments! Aaaand they're still super fun.

  5. S.E. - Fordham says:

    those shark bites were delicious

  6. Dana Nicole says:

    I was eating an orange Sharkbite once and it pulled out my loose molar. I never ate them again.

  7. Amanda says:


  8. Lauren, University o says:

    I used to LOVE the skip-it…until my feet got too big and I couldn't fit them in the little ring thing.

  9. Regina says:

    In third grade, my friend Stacey Skip-It so hard that she Broke-It. We were pretty hardcore…oh man, do I miss Dunkaroos! Ant string cheese. I know they still make it (der), but it seems like all the cool kids had string cheese in elementary school…

  10. Erin says:

    i actually tried to make a cootie catcher the other day…it came out horribly. i forgot how to do it :(

  11. Nikki says:

    I seriously miss those carefree days!

  12. ela says:

    yoyos were hot for 1 season…pogs too.

  13. Allison says:

    Sharkbites! How did you know! I loved those things!

    And I'm fairly sure I owned that same exact trapper-keeper.

  14. jen says:

    i love how everyone my age had like the same childhood even though we all grew up in various parts of the country. oh, and at my elem school in NC we got married in the log cabin on the playground. i think i was a bridesmaid once.

  15. Lucy says:

    Awwww. I miss unicorns.

  16. Lovely says:

    What about gigapets? those things were the bomb

  17. Jenny says:

    Not too many cool things for kids these days, but my daughter is growing a real plant that MOVES when you Tickle IT! It's called the TickleMe Plant

    It's a must have grow kit. We found it at http://www.ticklemeplant.com you gotta love that video!

  18. Benjamin says:

    I'm only 16 and I remember all of the above.

    Great post, so true.

    keep it up CollegeCandy

  19. Lucy says:

    By the way… That picture is perfect. I probably have one somewhere of my friends in the 90's with the same haircuts and clothing styles. It's just perfect.

  20. Fran says:

    Thanks Jenny…decided not to skip a tickleme plant experience…just got a kit from your link


  21. fez says:

    Seriously, every one of those things is still popular. My nine-year-old brought Yoo-hoo every day this week.

    You don't get to be nostalgic until the stuff you remember is gone.

  22. Born in the 70's says:

    The country is Colombia, not Columbia. Otherwise, an amusing article.

  23. girl says:

    I miss trading @ lunch. You could always find someone with what you wanted and would take the crap your mom packed off your hands.

    Born in the 70’s…this is called college candy, not been graduated from college for 15 years. Just saying.

  24. Sarah says:

    ok…got a tickleme plant kit for my dorm…thans

  25. Pumpkin00013 says:

    This is so dead on… but I miss nap time, snack time and play time most…

  26. Guy says:

    It sucks that nobody can have any fun any more!! One of the funniest times I can remember from elementary school was when I was in fifth grade. We were standing in line for lunch and the class bully, let's call him John, was teasing this guy that was painting the hallway. John was giving this guy a ration about having a crappy job and how HE was going to be a LAWYER (Snooty bastard). So the painter man says; "If you don't shut your mouth, I'm going to paint your face white." So John says; "Why don't you paint my tongue" and sticks his tongue out at the guy closes his eyes and made that blurting sound with his tongue. So the painter man painted his tongue.

    It was hilarious!!! We all laughed at John for weeks. He was in the bathroom for all of lunch and most of the afternoon with his mouth under the sink. I don't think the painterman got in trouble. If the little kid mouths off to a hardworking bluecollar man just trying to feed his kids, why shouldn't the bluecollar man punish him.

    It was awesome. I didn't like John, he made fun of my big ears.

  27. [jen] says:

    fuck one word.


  28. j h says:

    beat the fuck out of working, if only i had known that then

  29. anonymous says:

    This is without a doubt the dumbest Top 10 list I have ever seen.

  30. Ellie says:

    Oh Jenny! The Tickle Plant is actually a mimosa plant (not alcoholic). It is absolutely awesome! I first saw it in my Plant Bio class and I touched all the leaves and when the other students came, they were slow, they tried touching it and it didn't move… haha… But yeah, I was so excited that I told everyone I knew but of course, my mom, boyfriend, and others native from Asia weren't impressed because apparently, it is very common in Taiwan and Hong Kong…

    I wanted a Skip-It so badly but I never got one. I should have asked my parents because they would have bought it but I didn't want to waste money, which is a contrast to my little brother who asks for gifts all the time when we were little…

  31. Betsy says:

    TickleMe Plant …yea I saw that on CSI NY

    but the video is even more dramatic at the ticklemeplant.com website. This beats having a gold fish in my dorm. A Pet TickleMe Plant that moves when tickled. I cant believe this is real and Ive never heard of it before I saw it on CSI.

    I cant wait to grow it.

  32. diego says:

    crack cocaine cannot ever be pure. coke can be pure. crack cocaine is made by adding fillers to coke, which makes it cheaper, and makes more of it. so saying “pure crack cocaine” is dumb.

  33. Marissa says:

    Yes Diego, because little did we know that this post was ACTUALLY about drugs. Good for you for being so astute as to point out a fact that no one cares about, because it’s just a saying.

    Anyway, I LOOOOOVED my Skip-It. I could never get tired of that thing. Also, Pogs were the shit.

  34. Suburban Squirrel says:

    Whoa, whoa, whoa… unicorns?!? It's obvious that a girl wrote this. ;)

    My top three:

    #3) See-Saws – Specifically Earthquakes (shaking it side to side)and Atomic Drops (suddenly hopping off and crashing your partner to the ground).

    #2) Halloween – Seriously, it rivaled Christmas as THE best holiday of the year. Awesome costumes + free candy + staying out late = Win.

    #1) G.I Joe – No explanation needed. If you disagree, you're probably a Cobra sympathizer.


  35. Staci says:

    People.. wtf? For crying out loud- it's a SLAP bracelet. …nuff said.

  36. Shelby says:

    Ok Im in for getting a Tickleme Plant grow kit to scare my friends. That plant can freak anyone out. I found this video on it. http://www.ticklemeplant.com/video/video.htm

  37. Sarah says:

    I remember looking longing at the lunchables while my mom bought the god-awful bologna. So to add…the event in which I would get lunchables:


    And I know they don't do/allow this anymore in public schools, but I liked making those freaking long green and red paper chains to count down the days until Christmas.

  38. dc says:



    everything neon and dayglow

    i also miss how happy a happy meal made me

  39. Jessie says:

    O, I remember all of those! I hate how people have to pick out everything wrong with this article! Good for you, you think you're smart!

    But I was obsessed with Trapper Keepers! I got a new one every year, and new folders, and pens and pencils! O, man, to eat what you wanted and not gain a pound, to run around the neighborhood wild, to play kickball at recess, and to chase boys around the play ground! What a life!

  40. Rebel224Rebel says:

    And the little hand jive/slapping games. The most epic and complicated motions had to go with the most inane but catchy rhymes. Like the one I spent six weeks perfecting, that you did to the rhythm of yourself reciting a pre-formulated list of things off the MacDonald's menu (sadly, I remember the words but not the pattern). This was not your average "Miss Mary Mack".

  41. Stephanie says:

    Oh my gosh, this list is brilliant- Lisa Frank was definitely my elementary school muse. I also loved celebrating the 100th day of school…mainly because it usually involved counting- and then eating- 100 pieces of candy. On a similar note, whatever happened to the idea of using candy to teach math? I'd be a hell of a lot more interested in calculus if there were M&Ms involved, seriously.

    And let's not forget playing "spider" on the swings, those red sit-and-bounce balls in P.E., and book fairs, bitch! (Yeah, I was the nerd who got excited when I saw the Scholastic fliers…so shoot me.)

  42. Kelster165 says:

    Oh my gosh! I'm only 13 and I remember most of those things! The only thing I didn't really relate to was the trapper keepers. But what I really liked was being able to play tackle football without the "Lunch aids"(which was a whole other part of elementary all together) yelling at you. It was also nice to have a guy-friend with out having to worry about the mistake of people thinking it was your boy-friend. But how about those awesome seating arrangements? They would change like, once a month. They would be really cool shapes also, like, a huge circle or a sideways E or something. And only 1 teacher, that was kinda nice. the homework I mostly remember was the math homework where you colored certain answers different colors to make some kind of picture.

  43. Lou says:

    If this extended into kindergarten, my vote would be for nap time. Well, I guess calc class will have to do for now.

  44. gmeover says:

    Ahhh…. Elementary school was awesome. Yoo-Hoo is still around, and still delicious. Apparently Yoo-Hoo tastes like breast milk and chocolate syrup. Oh, and I had coloring homework in High School. I think my history teacher was just lazy

  45. FMDC says:

    Oh my god! Dunkaroos and Shark Bites! I had completely forgotten what a big part of my life those used to be…

    I still drink Yoo-Hoo all the time. It goes great with a blunt.

  46. Kaos says:

    How could you not mention Garbage Pail Kids???!! Everyone had them!

  47. RJ42 says:

    I loved the book fairs and the scholastic fliers. I almost totally forgot about those. And book-it. Yay for being a nerd.

    I think the first time I ever had a lunchable was a few years ago for dinner at work. My parents never let me have them, too expensive. But, oh man, was I jealous of my friends that had them.

  48. v says:


    I’m pretty sure we visited the same website that said that.

    I was a big fan of the pens with the spring and a figure and some feathers on top. They usually had sparkly tape wrapped around them.

    My elementary school also had a log cabin.

    Also I rocked at Accelerated Reader. Just saying.

  49. Matt says:

    love the list, only suggestion would be dunkaroos somewhere on there.

  50. Kayla says:

    don’t forget about the furby’s!

  51. Claire says:

    Pokemon, Lip Smackers, Arts and Crafts, String Cheese, Valentines Day celebrations, Jelly Sandals, Cookie Monster still liked cookies.

    Just sayin'

  52. Gabbilicious says:

    lol my dad still buys yoohoo!

    It actually tastes super watery now but its still so good.

    I have some snap bracelets that I won at an arcade tho :P

    and yes, shark bites are gods gift to children. I thought they still made them?

  53. seraphrevan says:

    This is the greatest article I've ever read.

  54. Julie says:

    Snap bracelets were AWESOME!

    Here are some of my additions:

    #5)Candy necklaces and bracelets. Mmm…

    #4)Sneaking downstairs on a Saturday morning to watch your favorite cartoons like Lucky Luke, TNMT, Power Rangers, Biker Mice From Mars, Transformers and the list goes on.

    #3)SLIME! Those tubs of slime where you put your finger in and it would make a farting-sound. For some reason it would always end up in the drain.

    #2)The “My dad is tougher than your dad” discussions.

    #1)Christmas. It was magical

  55. Brandon says:

    #11 Being paddled by that really cute substitute teacher. /sarcasm

  56. Milander says:

    Jeez, I'm only 38 and you're making me feel old! All the stuff on this list was just yesterday to me.

  57. I_HAVE_404 says:

    Snow days…living in the Chicago suburbs during winter sucked especially when you had to walk to school,but on the rare occasion it snowed so much that it shut down school. It was pure heaven. I can still hear the announcements on WGN radio in my head. I also miss shows like Bozo circus and Ray Raynor. Those days are gone forever.

  58. Starcasm says:

    Oh, to go back to that happy time. The time with slap bracelets and trapper keepers, and who could forget shark bites?


  59. Canadian-girl says:

    I'm from Canada where we don't have yoo-hoos :( Does anyone remember when everything was clear? Pepsi Clear and Coke had one too. Also Red Rover, Nothing like breaking a collar bone before your 10! Also OMFG BOZO!!!!!!!

  60. FriPilot says:

    C. Girl, we didn’t have YooHoo’s in the midwest when I was in school either. I discovered them much later in the southwest. I have friends from the east coast though, who remember them well. I guess they traveled west, like Coors beer traveled east.

  61. Jenn says:

    Seriously? You called the binders with velcro tabs "trapper Keepers?" They were Note Totes here in Ontario, and everyone had one. I would definitely agree with the Dunkaroos addition, but also Gushers. And the Scholastic Book Fairs, and the Pizza Hut Book-It program – getting free pizzas to read books? I'm totally in. Other awesome parts of elementary school: winter carnivals, walk-a-thons on school time…

  62. Ed-england says:

    im liking this list alot :), and the addition of sat morning tv, TMHT (hero not ninja!), Biker mice etc. also Pokémon wasn’t until later on, real old school were Pogs man. Diet coke being in a white can. kiss chase anyone? how has no one said game boy, sega, snes??? and i remember how it was so cheap and awesome to go over to usa for holiday and get warheads, now when i go over there just not the same :'(

  63. Kirsten says:

    This brings me back, I haven't heard the name lisa frank in years!

  64. Demiera says:

    As I was reading your post, I got terribly nostalgic. Being in college and missing the good ol' carefree days of grammar school is NO FUN!

    I remember waiting impatiently for the 5th grade to roll around, because that was the grade when you first got to carry a trapper keeper. My Skip-It was the SHIT…it even lit up!! And I will STILL eat a lunchable if it's available!

    Thank you for this refreshing trip down memory lane!

  65. sofia says:

    who remember the sign on the back of the cheese bus “this bus has been checked for sleeping children”?

  66. Cody_G says:

    damn……. all of these were the best,

    although i have to say P.E. was on that list,

    playing dodgeball spin offs cause the school had banned them, capture the flag, and of course field trips, the local nature preserve is like a childrens whore or something.

    also, mario or duck hunt.

    but this is a beautiful post, thanks,

  67. […] was mine.  The days when the only thing I had to worry about trying not to hurt myself when I was Skippin’ It outside all day.  The days when I was bumpin’ “If You Steal My Sunshine” and getting a […]

  68. Allen Falfa says:

    I feel that this list is too gender specific. It represents the ten best things about elementary school in the eyes of a little girl and not the average student. As a male, I don't remember these things as the best things my friends and I liked, they were the ten things that the girls in the class liked. It is so obviouse that writer is female.

  69. alex says:


  • You Might Like