Encouraging Your Guy To Get A “Happy Ending”? Uh, No.

windowslivewriteramassageparlorsayitaintso-84a9massage-parlor2.pngYou’ve probably heard of a “happy ending” massage, and if you haven’t, what the hell kind of PG-rated world are you living in? As weird and dirty as I think they are (how many people have been jacked off in that room. Seriously?), if dudes (and yes, some women) want to have a stranger who probably hates their job help them orgasm, then whatever. Go for it.

But allowing your husband to get one? Encouraging and then laughing with him about it afterwards? Telling him how cute it was that he had a hard time finding someone to finally do it?

WTF.

Now, I’m not one of those rabid girlfriends who beats their boyfriend for accidentally checking out the boobs of another woman — hell, I’m not even one of those girls who won’t let her dude go to a strip club — but I really don’t think I’d spend my time convincing my husband to let some other chick give him a handjob for $55 with tip.

My reasoning is less about the possibility of him getting ideas and then cheating (I believe if a guy is gonna cheat he’s gonna cheat, no matter what you say or do), and more about the weirdness of encouraging a husband to seek outside sexual gratification. I mean, if I’m his wife, shouldn’t I be the one providing all the sex acts? Is that what you kind of promise when you get married — that you’re the one who will be giving all the handjobs from now on?

What do you think? If you were married, would you encourage your guy to get a “happy ending”?

4 Comments on "Encouraging Your Guy To Get A “Happy Ending”? Uh, No."

  1. jes says:
    Tue, 14th Oct 200811:07 am 

    All I know is that picture is great! haha

    And there’s no way in hell I’d encourage that… pu-lease!

  2. LucyInTheSky says:
    Tue, 14th Oct 20084:42 pm 

    There is no difference between this and hiring a hooker, which is A. illegal and B. not OK with me.

  3. DenverSteve says:
    Wed, 15th Oct 200812:08 am 

    Well its not actually illegal in Nevada. Just in Vegas. However the authorities are actually trying to cut down on all these parlors. To me, its cheating. For better or worse you’re with your partner to the end.

  4. John C. Silver says:
    Wed, 15th Oct 20088:00 am 

    Well this is what happens when you outsource touch… Case in point you get a back rub (5-10 min) and are too lazy to reciprocate properly. 30 seconds does not constitute a real back rub. Rain-checks are full of sh*t as you rather make up a fight then give a backrub wouldn’t you.

    Listen if you can’t rub someones back for 5 minutes un-interrupted expect that the person will look for touch elsewhere.

    But I digress happy ending parlors are disgusting, any real man worth his salt would make sure that both partners would willing reciprocate.

    Don’t be doting, but FFS don’t be stingy to touch the person you’re with, even just running your fingers through their hair when they AREN’T driving is something of real value.

    And Don’t get all icked out get your hands down their already if it’s just about that. Talking it to death instead of just doing is the work of loud-mouth brat.

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