Pillow Talk with Diana: “I’m Shy About Getting On Top!”

Q: My boyfriend wants me to get on top during sex, and I want to, but I feel too self-conscious about my body! I just feel like like I’ll be on display, with all of my flaws in his face. Any words of wisdom?

A: You will be on display–and your boyfriend will be loving every minute of it. Part of the reason the girl on top position is often requested by guys is because it’s hot! And not just because it feels good or because sometimes guys want to just lay there–a lot of the appeal is that he gets to see you. All of you. And I can’t stress this enough–he wants to.

And it seems like you want to also. If you had written to me to say that he wants you on top but there’s nothing you hate more, then I might have told you that there’s no reason you need to do something in bed that you don’t like. But it seems like something you’re curious about, and you very may well like.

My advice: just do it.

First off, assuming you’ve had sex in any position, he’s seen pretty much all there is to see of you. You getting on top isn’t going to contort your body in such a way that he doesn’t recognize the hot body he loves. You can stand on your head, stand on his head, whatever–it’s still your body. Just like you won’t transform into Heidi Klum if you shag with him on top, you also won’t transform into an Unf**kable the moment you saddle up on top of him.

So saddle up already! There’s no amount of fretting about this that will make it easier. The great part about that is, once you get on top of him, five seconds later–that’s it, you’ve done it. You’re on top, and he’s seeing it all, and you never have to go through that “first time I get on top” scary feeling ever again. If you want to ease into it, wear some sexy, lacy, heart-stopping lingerie and keep it on when you first hop on top (this won’t work with a large t-shirt). And once you’re up there, I beg you, no strategic angling of your body and no hands over the tummy. If you’re going to do it, then do it 100% — don’t cheat yourself out of what may very well turn into your favorite position!

Readers–how do you ease into a body-baring position? Leave your tips in the comments!

Got a question for Pillow Talk? Email pillow.talk.cc@gmail.com and we’ll tackle it next Tuesday!

[Image via Reader's Digest]