He Said/She Said: Do Guys Like Sarcasm?

November 19, 2008     Posted in Relationships

large_adcashew.JPG

24

A friend sent me this post last week and asked me what I thought about it. Being a very sarcastic (and witty, if I do say so myself) person, I got scared. And embarassed. An angry. “Yeah, cuz this loser knows what he’s talking about.”

Woops; that was just more unfeminine sarcasm.

I couldn’t stop thinking about the strong opinions the author held and wondered if they were his alone, or if all the men I have ever liked (and not dated) felt the same. Do guys find women who are sarcastic unattractive? Is sarcasm the unibrow of a woman’s personality (hence the photo)? I asked a guy:

sarcasm-1.jpg

sarcasm-2.png

sarcasm-3.jpg

sarcasm-4.jpg

24 Comments on "He Said/She Said: Do Guys Like Sarcasm?"
  1. jen says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 200811:40 am 

    great now i know that every guy i've ever talked to hates me…no wonder i'm always single!! i thought i was being cute and witty too….guess not lol

  2. sam says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20081:15 pm 

    If that's the reason I'm single, I'll take it.

    I would rather not have a guy who can't handle a quick wit than have to deal with him crying bitch at every remark.

  3. Danie says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20081:24 pm 

    I agree with Sam. Most of the men I dated were attracted to my personality because of my clever use of sarcasm. I mean, how else would I have landed a British man if it wasn't for my wit and sarcasm? I am sure it just depends on the guy and how a woman chooses to use her sarcasm. I think sarcasm is a very important part of my personality and if a guy doesn't get it, he's not for me.

  4. Mazuba says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20081:24 pm 

    Oh wow..that's interesting..i was just talking to my guy last nite and he says im way too sarcastic and i need 2 cut down on it..but i can't help it..

  5. Thomas says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20082:01 pm 

    Sarcasm is just like anything, in measured amounts is good…too much of it is annoying. We all have a friend, or know a person, who EVERY answer or comment is a joke or trying to be a joke. You just want a straight answer or to have a conversation without all the effort. Same with sarcasm, too much of it just gets annoying. It gets to the point where in your head as you as you say something to that person you are already figuring out in your head what sarcastic answer they will respond with.

  6. kitty says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20082:18 pm 

    can't stand this everyone's a comedian/sarcastic asshole trend.

  7. Liv says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20082:26 pm 

    Wow I had no clue this was even an issue. I'm a little sarcastic but it's not usually at someone else's expense and I've never thought I was bitchy. Now I do.. and I'll be too scared to open my mouth for fear of what will come out. (seriously)

  8. C says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20083:51 pm 

    I read this and was a bit worried; I happen to be really sarcastic. But I asked my guy and he completely disagreed…he said it was a necessity and that it was hot!

  9. Amy says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20084:59 pm 

    Hey, if I'm single because I'm sarcastic, so be it. I've been this way for as long as I can remember, and I'm not planning to change anytime soon.

    The men (and women) I encounter can choose to feel however they like about my use of sarcasm. Will I care if they can't stand me for it?

    Nope.

  10. Darcy says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20087:00 pm 

    absolutely no apologies about my sarcastic nature. Men who can't appreciate it are mostly likely not ones I want to impress anyway :D win win situation

  11. C says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20087:43 pm 

    I think perhaps by sarcasm in the discussion he meant mean digs…there's mean sarcasm then there's everyone's laughing goodtime sarcasm which is probably what they're referring to as wit. I'm sarcastic, but i know when it goes too far and becomes just mean.

  12. Beth says:
    Wed, 19th Nov 20089:27 pm 

    Interesting. I'm quite sarcastic, and so are most of my friends and family, so I don't even think about it. Reading through some of these comments, apparently I'm not the only one who's unaware of how others see me. Not only am I sarcastic, I'm also very self-deprecating; most people seem to take it as having poor self esteem, but it's quite the opposite. If I really felt that way about myself, there's no way I'd be making jokes! Oh well.

  13. Carolynn says:
    Thu, 20th Nov 20086:03 am 

    Guys have repeatedly told me they enjoy my sarcasm. And every guy that can understand my sense of humor and cynical/sarcastic ways and is also sarcastic, I have been very attracted to and had great relationships with. This article is bull! :)

  14. LZ says:
    Thu, 20th Nov 200810:21 pm 

    I personally find it incredibly insulting that anyone would look at my use of sarcasm as driven by low self esteem. Is my sence of humor and use of "wit" based on my physical features? Hot = Sweetie Pie Ugly = Sarcasm? I don't think I follow this line of thought and I don't want to nurture it.

  15. Alice says:
    Fri, 21st Nov 20082:49 am 

    I think the author of that article you linked is having a tough time linguistically disassociating insults from sarcasm. Nobody likes to be made fun of (well, when it isn't clearly good-natured), and yes, that can include sarcasm. But the problem isn't sarcasm itself. It's like saying you don't like sugar because you don't like chocolate.

  16. samantha says:
    Fri, 21st Nov 20082:14 pm 

    i agree with most of you. i'm sarcastic a lottt, especially when flirting with guys, but i'm nice to them too. if a guy can't handle a little bit of sarcasm, then why would i even want to date him? too soft for me.

  17. heather says:
    Fri, 21st Nov 20088:04 pm 

    yes, i am also a very sarcastic individual. if people dont like it, i also tend to not give a shit. im not mean about it though, and i have a feeling that "meanness" and sarcasm are a little bit blended in this article.

  18. deb says:
    Sat, 22nd Nov 20089:45 am 

    So wait, it's OK for guys to be sarcastic (which, by the way, I LOVE) and not women? F*ck that. Not all men are that insecure, I'm glad to pick and choose the ones who can will dish it out AND take it. Being nasty about it is a totally different issue. If someone is a nasty person, they're just ugly to begin with, has nothing to do with sarcasm.

  19. Nicolle says:
    Sat, 22nd Nov 20086:36 pm 

    Fuck that. I've been a sarcastic asshole since middle school and I don't plan on changing anytime soon. No, it's not the best idea to go around alienating everyone you encounter, but I'm not pathetic and desperate enough to rewire a large part of my personality to impress a male. Compromise is good. Changing yourself in hopes of bettering your life, excellent. Changing a part of yourself, simply to make guys interested in you, just plain sad. Come on ladies, how many guys would do the same?

  20. sara says:
    Tue, 25th Nov 20083:28 am 

    I agree with kitty:

    can’t stand this everyone’s a comedian/sarcastic asshole trend.

    this whole thing is just annoying. thats why i HATED juno- every word out of her mouth was some obnoxious dig, and no one talks like that.

  21. Erin says:
    Sat, 6th Dec 20086:04 pm 

    You know who also thinks sarcasm is unfeminine? My mother and all the other people from that generation. So if you feel that way about sarcasm you're probably either old, stupid, or a snob.

  22. HatesIdiots says:
    Thu, 6th Jan 20117:54 am 

    dat shud be becaus u're too dumb to be witty and sarcastic yrself

  23. HatesIdiots says:
    Thu, 6th Jan 20117:55 am 

    i tink de same

  24. Xing0L says:
    Sun, 23rd Oct 201112:08 am 

    Sarcasm is NOT a personality trait! It is a learned behavior. I don't think that sarcasm is un-feminine at all, it is passive-aggressive….And that is something I cannot stand and will not put up with. I'm a very direct, aggressive, dominate guy with a type A personality and a violent temper. Besides, people who are derisively sarcastic usually are extremely insecure and don't have a good sense of humor.

Tell us what you're thinking...