We’ve All Been There: The Late Night Binge

December 2, 2008     Posted in HaHa

drunk.jpg[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.


By Lauren

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

You woke up early to work out before class. After an hour on the elliptical and thirty minutes in the weight room (20 of which were spent staring at the dudes at the bench press), you head home to get ready for your day. You shower, throw on a pair of jeans, and grab a yogurt and some fruit on the way out the door.

For lunch you eat a salad (with the dressing on the side), and an huge glass of water.

Your afternoon snack is a Ziploc baggie filled with Kashi and, if you really need it, a Grande coffee with 2 pumps of Sugar Free Vanilla from Starbucks.

For dinner you have a veggie burger and a baked potato. You treat yourself to a can of Diet Coke. You feel full and satisfied; all this healthy eating and living isn’t really as hard as you were expecting it to be!

While you are downing the last of your D.C. your roommate runs into the room and invites you to the bar.

“Come onnnnnn. Pleaaaase? I don’t wanna go aloooooone. I promise it will be fun. I’ll buy you drinksssss!”

You weren’t planning on going (in fact you were planning on laying in bed and watching Sister Act 2 with a bag of Smart Pop Kettle Korn), but she looks so pathetic…and you wouldn’t mind having a drink.

So, you go. And one Vodka and Soda (a very low calorie beverage) leads to two, which leads to shots, which lead to cigarettes, which lead to beers. Eventually you are too drunk to make good decisions and all that hard work you did all week is out the window. Even that dance you did to “Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy” can’t touch the calories you just ingested.

And then it gets worse.

When you get home you remember that whole healthy living thing you’ve been doing. You beeline to the kitchen for some carrot sticks, but it only takes one bite to realize that carrot sticks are the last thing a drunk person wants to eat. You try some whole wheat toast (ew), a bowl of cereal (nope), and even some salty pretzels (make you want to vom).

Then your roommate’s pizza gets delivered. It smells so good. Mmmm, look at that gooey cheese.

Before you know what you are doing, you are elbow deep in cheese and sauce, and dipping breadsticks into Ranch dressing. It is over in a minute, but the damage is done: 3 slices of pizza and 4 breadsticks. You begin to feel guilty (even though you know it was totally worth it), so you get up and go to bed.

In the morning you wake up feeling hung over, achy and in serious need of some water. As you get up to head to the kitchen you spot yourself in the mirror…with tomato sauce smeared across your cheek. And the whole night (especially the ending) comes rushing back to you. You quickly realize that you are going to have to get back to the gym after class.

Dammit.

24 Comments on "We’ve All Been There: The Late Night Binge"

  1. Gina says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 20086:21 am 

    Ah, yes. Tuna, Chef Boyardee, re-heated grilled cheese, Kroger brand pizza rolls – I have indeed been there.

    Minus the whole "gym in the morning" and "healthy diet in general" thing. Oops.

  2. Diana says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 20087:43 am 

    Oh, NO, a whole THREE PIECES of pizza…and FOUR breadsticks?!?! What a cow!

  3. Erin says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 20087:50 am 

    Yeah, definitely been there… I talk about pizza and alcohol here: http://student-body.blogspot.com/2008/07/realisti…

    Diana- are you kidding me? That's like 1600 calories, almost an entire day's worth!

  4. E says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 20088:51 am 

    Diana wins at The Internets.

  5. Nikki says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 200810:41 am 

    OMG…I know those girls! On of them went to my high school! Does one of you know them too or do you guys scour through webshots for article related pics? LOL…this kinda scares me….I've long forgotten about my college webshots albums but it kinda makes me wanna make them private…just in case!! ;)

  6. Lindz says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 200811:25 am 

    Oh god, have I been there. My three roomates, guy friends and boyfriends all order out, and in my drunken blur think that "i'll only take a bite" is a plausable plan of action.

    then one you take a bite of what everyone else is eating, somehow you took a really big bite and all those cheese fries are missing.

    cool.

    I wore my fat pants the next morning.

  7. Meg says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 200811:58 am 

    this was pretty much my life story this time last year

  8. Kaley says:
    Tue, 2nd Dec 200810:06 pm 

    For some reason, cottage cheese is my drunk food.

  9. hannah says:
    Wed, 3rd Dec 20085:28 am 

    Omg… yes *story of my life* last year as well. The ~20 lbs I gained my freshman year was a VERY good incentive to cause me to make a conscious effort to not let this happen as frequently this year.

  10. Stephanie says:
    Wed, 3rd Dec 20081:27 pm 

    Uhh. I eat when I'm hungry.

    I've never understood how people gain so much weight. Don't you friggin notice?

  11. Diana says:
    Wed, 3rd Dec 20081:48 pm 

    Dude, if all I ate all day was rabbit food, I think I would benefit from all 1,600 of those gooey, cheesy, greasy CALORIES!

    And besides, different people have different requirements as far as necessary caloric intake is concerned, depending on metabolism, exercise, etc. We don't all conform to the 2,000 calorie a day model.

  12. b says:
    Wed, 3rd Dec 20082:40 pm 

    lmao i agree with diana. 3 slices of pizza and 4 breadsticks is not a binge.

    my last binge was a whole large pizza, a jumbo bag of all-dressed chips, a large bag of twizzlers, a large bag of fuzzy peaches, 2 peanutbutter sandwiches, and a bag of cookies. oh and a pint of soy ice cream.

    pigging out is not binging.

  13. belle says:
    Wed, 3rd Dec 20085:35 pm 

    i eat when i'm hungry also.

    and when i'm drunk, bored,there is food in the general vicinity of my body. i don't see how anyone can restrict eating to just when they are hungry.

    though it's only a matter of time til my ass catches up to my metabolism…my day of reckoning…

  14. Jes- USouthAL says:
    Thu, 4th Dec 20088:28 am 

    wow b, you have to be kidding.

    I couldn't even fit a whole pizza in my stomach if I tried to, much less all that other crap… My body would force it back up… yuck.

    Thats like the dude who eats 6 buckets of chicken and 4 pies everyday for lunch and has to be lifted out of his house through the bay window… geez.

  15. Jes- USouthAL says:
    Thu, 4th Dec 20088:29 am 

    I just dont see how he could even fit all that in his body though, doesn't your body shut down after that much at one time?

  16. bru-dude says:
    Thu, 4th Dec 200811:16 am 

    Break up a brick of Top Ramen (uncooked). Put cheese on top of uncooked Top Ramen. Set microwave to melt. Instant Ramen Nachos. So good.

  17. b says:
    Thu, 4th Dec 200811:59 am 

    i'm 110lbs and 5'5. when i die, nobody's lifting me out a window.

    most of the time, i eat next to nothing.

    sometimes i binge. and by that, i mean eat uncontrollably for a few hours, not cheat on my diet. and yes, it does all fit in my stomach.

    binge eating is an eating disorder. try to use properly terminology next time.

  18. mike hawk says:
    Thu, 4th Dec 20081:31 pm 

    the chicks are totally hot …. yummy

  19. Jes- USouthAL says:
    Fri, 5th Dec 200810:00 am 

    Oh, I'm sorry if I offended you by my lack of proper terminology- spare me.

    And I'm really sorry if you have a disorder, but dont we all in one form or another.. My point was simply asking how its possible to fit that much food into one's stomach unless you're over at least 400 lbs… I just didn't think it was possible. (I mean maybe if you eat a pizza, puke it up. eat a bag of doritos & donuts- puke it up..)

    But I'm 5'10 and 127 and there's no way in hell I could physically fit that much matter into my stomach. Its just not anatomically possible for me, is all.

    Dont get your panties in a wad… everyone on here seems to look for someone to take offense at… geez.

    And btw- that guy (who I was actually talking about) isn't just a "binge eater," he eats that much all the time- hence why his ass had to be lifted out of a bay window… sigh.

  20. melissa says:
    Fri, 5th Dec 20087:17 pm 

    LOL @ Diana and LOL @ "Mike Hawk".

    I prefer "Mike Litoris".

  21. b says:
    Sun, 7th Dec 20088:16 pm 

    oh wow. i try to clarify what i said before and suddenly i'm a raging, hateful bitch who's just trying to be mean. that's obviously it.

    i don't take offense. i'm just trying to clarify some things (don't take this the wrong way.. but in your reply, you implied that purging is necessary for a large binge.. it isn't).

    comments are just that: comments. not attacks on what you've said. relax.

  22. TimothyF says:
    Tue, 9th Dec 20086:59 am 

    lol I've never heard Mike Litoris before.

    Grumble that was a pretty funny link… what's with the $25,000 thing though?

  23. kat says:
    Tue, 9th Dec 20088:15 pm 

    if you gonna binge get a free t-shirt from this web site to cover up the rolls – cristinav.com

    just ask them for a free t shirt when you check out.

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