Overheard: Did He Really Say That?
January 25, 2009 Posted in HaHa
[Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!
Leave your own overheard convos in the comments.]
Boy: “Hey, you gotta stay here, it’s dicks only.”
Girl: “That’s fine, I didn’t want to come anyway… What?”
“So how much vodka are you supposed to put in a jello shot?”
“All of it.”
“Don’t you know who my father is? Mr. Jonathan Associated-Press?”
“Is he related to Jonathan the Husky?”
After a moment:
“It’s… it’s last names, buddy.”
“Uh-oh. Lookin’ bad down there. Gotta trim the forest. All the little pubic people are gonna die.”
“What do you get when you mix a chainsaw and a brown bear?”
“What?”
“I don’t know. It’s living in my room. Can I sleep in your bed tonight?”
“Can’t talk now. At work. I just got eaten by a giant grouper. Gotta go.”
“I’m going to go through every single flavored coffee I can think of and discuss how I feel about each. Because… it’s Friday night!“
“So – if you get the exams back, and there’s a problem with your grade, you and I and the professor can all meet after class and we will have a threesome. Okay?”
“I have that butts picture that you gave me, and then I have all my female superheroes, and then Marilyn Monroe, and then… Amanda Palmer’s bare breasts. Yup, totally into dudes.”
“You should hang up those vagina trees you drew.”
“Yeah, I should.”
“I sometimes think about how comfortable a womb would be, and then I think – hey. You don’t breathe. And that terrifies me. Even though it would be fun, you know, bouncing around.”
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Julie says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20094:20 pm
Girl:So instead of paying your rent, you bought your books?
Guy:Yeah.
Girl:So you have your books for class but you're homeless?
Guy:Not yet.
Brittney says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20095:52 pm
“So many girls are fucking their guys the wrong way that they are breaking their cocks!”
after many gasps
“Well.. It’s not really a break.. maybe more like a fracture. A boner has no bones.”
Madison says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20096:22 pm
It sounds like this is “Overheard at the Acid Test”
Rachel says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20097:16 pm
Guy 1:”Man, I’m so tired. I’ve been standin all day!”
Guy 2: “Oh yeah? What’s standin?”
Guy 1: “You know, not sitting…”
Guy 2: “Ooooh.”
Stephanie says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20097:35 pm
A penis has no bones, period.
Stephie B says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20097:36 pm
“here.. let me cultivate your cotton”
C says:
Sun, 25th Jan 20099:30 pm
walking toward the living room….
my cousin: “yeah so im letting my dad plow it instead of my boyfriend.”
my mom: “oh im glad at least you know he’ll do a fantastic job”
they were talking about the giant backyard she needed to fix in her new house, but the look on my face when i walked in im sure was just….wellll i dont even know but hawrrible for sure.
Eliza says:
Sun, 25th Jan 200911:46 pm
“Here, this is purple.”
“No, I want a bright purple. This is too dark, it’s like purple on suicide watch.”
ely says:
Mon, 26th Jan 20093:17 am
two guys are walking in the library (on flat surface). One guy trips. His friend goes ‘Dude, did you just trip over the floor?’
sara says:
Tue, 27th Jan 20095:47 pm
“And so it sucks for her because she got cheated on by her friend’s teacher…”
Wait, what!?