The Pros and Cons of Dressing Down for the Bar

It’s 9:30 PM on a glorious Thursday evening. You are anxiously anticipating the start of Thirsty Thursday…until your roomie calls to tell you pregame’s at 10! You haul ass home from yoga-lates, scrub yourself in the shower, and shun your razor—baby smooth legs will have to wait for a less time-crunched evening. You barely have enough time to swipe on some mascara and, lord knows, your hair is air drying (embrace the wave).

You throw open your closet, throw on the first cute top you see and wear your butt jeans and sex kitten heels to compensate. You dash downstairs to join in on the Franzia fueled festivities and are greeted by a friend.

“Aw, don’t you look…comfortable?!”

Excuse moi? Comfortable? You weren’t thinking that exactly…just casual. But no – you have now been lumped into that category: you’re the girl who’s dressed down for the bar. Let us explore the positives and negatives of this conundrum.

Pro: Your feet are feeling mighty fine and you’re on your 8th rendition of the “Come On, Ride the Train.” Envious girls stare at you from their perches on bar stools—anything to get them off those blistering platforms. You enjoy the company of many a’ inebriated fella as they embrace your carefree love of dancing (read: drunken spinning and arm movements.) And while homegirl is teetering around on her 4 inchers trying not to slip in bar slime, you and your comfy arches make record time to the front of the line when it’s time to re up.

Con: As Mr. Cheeks would say, “Them high heels got them calves lookin’ right too!” Heels do have that magic ‘lift and strut’ factor, which is incredibly hard to imitate in flats…let alone under the influence of Irish Car Bombs. You will also be dwarfed by men and women alike, so don’t get separated from your girls; it might be a while until you reunite on line for the bathroom. Additionally, you might wake up the next morning with a case of stiletto toe: some girls just don’t watch (or care) who’s feet they step on, and your pedi will be the one to suffer.

Pro: Your jeans allow for a much larger range of motion than your girlfriends’ mini dresses and skirts. Bartop splits? You’re there. Compromising photos for the sake of a scavenger hunt? It’s all you, babydoll. Have no fear picking up your lip gloss when you drop it, and fret not about the proper method of entering and exiting a cab in front of the door line.

Con: That lack of a lil’ extra leg might get you passed over for shots from skeevy old dudes or no access to the velvet ropes of V.I.P., but rest assured in knowing your awesome night was earned on your own merits, not those of your stems or bootay.

Pro: Your clinking and clanking 498 bangles on each wrist will not add to the deafening bar noise of loud music and drunken shouting. You will not get your ring tangled in the locks of a lucky gentleman should you choose to partake in a makeout sesh. Your super freaking huge dangly earrings will not fall victim to an unfortunate dance floor accident, leaving your earlobe bloody and painful. Your overall lack of ridiculous accessories will send off a low key, Earth Mama vibe that cute hippie guys are very into…

Con: Should you be lost or just a little too good at drunken hide and seek, your friends will not be able to locate you acoustically. Additionally, no wasted girl in the bathroom will tell you 3 (separate) times that she LOVES your necklace and will give you 3 pieces of gum and her half full vodka tonic to “borrow” it for the rest of the night.

Pro: Your “less is more” approach to your makeup for the evening will not backfire at the end of the night, when your eyeliner is more smudged than smoky and your crimson lips are more Lindsay than Scarlett. You will have no cake-face after drunken (and unnecessary) reapplications, and your skin will be in considerably better condition the next morning.

Con: There aren’t any. No one should be allowed in public looking like this.

The Verdict: The pros of keeping it casual for the bar far outweigh the cons. Keeping your look chic but relaxed will let you focus more on your badass night than maintaining your eyeliner. You will give off a more approachable vibe, not only because you don’t look like “that girl,” but because things like dancing because your feet aren’t killing you and laughing because you’re not too busy sucking in your cheeks attracts other awesome people.

It’s fun to occasionally spend hours getting all dressed up and dancing around your room, but not always practical or appropriate. At the end of the night you walk out of the bar knowing you had a good time—and you were cute and comfortable doing so. And those glamazons eyeing you from their fixed spot at their V.I.P. table? They’re doing it because they’re jealous.