Men are Jerks – Scientifically Proven!

469526409_1066a4ae03_o.jpgA new scientific study has been published that can’t be ignored. Basically all of our suspicions about men have been scientifically proven. I won’t even have to be witty or clever about it, I will just simply quote the article.

“Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated.”

Ah! According to Men’s brains, woman = screwdriver. They think of us on the same level as a hammer or a wrench. Great, right? But wait; it get’s so much better!

“Scans of some of the men found that a part of the brain associated with empathy for other peoples’ emotions and wishes shut down after looking at the pictures.”

So here’s how it works: Man sees woman in bikini. Man thinks “Mmmm….tooools.” The human part of Man’s brain literally shuts off. Yay!

Thus women understand 85% of their interactions with heterosexual males. But wait…it actually gets EVEN BETTER.

“In the study, Fiske’s team put straight men into an MRI brain scanner and showed them images of either clothed men and women, or more scantily clad men and women. When they took a memory test afterwards, the men best remembered images of bikini-clad women whose heads had been digitally removed.”

Now women, we have a new strategy. How many times have you thought, “why didn’t he call?” The answer is he can’t remember you because you have a face. If you want a guy to call you, you simply have to follow 2 easy steps.

1. Wear a bikini

2. Wear a ski mask

3. (Optional) Carry a power drill and/or tool belt

Now if you follow these steps you are on your way to snagging a man. Just remember once you have him, try not to have feelings or desires….or a face. This will only confuse him.

12 Comments on "Men are Jerks – Scientifically Proven!"

  1. The Fashionable Housewife says:
    Tue, 17th Feb 20091:42 pm 

    OMG that is hilarious!

  2. Cali says:
    Tue, 17th Feb 20094:10 pm 

    Is there a link to this study it’s pretty awesome lol

  3. Sarah says:
    Tue, 17th Feb 20097:31 pm 

    I’d like a link too – also, I wonder what would happen if they did a study like this on women :)

  4. Lucy says:
    Tue, 17th Feb 20098:11 pm 

    Hahahahahah! Yet another reason to hate men!

  5. Kelsy says:
    Wed, 18th Feb 20094:23 am 

    I think we need a new public holiday. Women-in-bikinis,-ski-masks-and-carrying-power-tools Day.

  6. Heather says:
    Wed, 18th Feb 200910:46 am 

    HAHAHA that just made me laugh to the point of tears… I wonder how true it is..

  7. Liza - Grove City College says:
    Wed, 18th Feb 20091:47 pm 

    The original article is here -

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2009/feb/16/sex-object-photograph.

    Glad you guys thought it was as funny as I did!

  8. Liza - Grove City College says:
    Wed, 18th Feb 20091:48 pm 

    wait I think that link is broken try this http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2009/feb/16/sex-object-photograph

  9. Denver Steve says:
    Wed, 18th Feb 20098:29 pm 

    I like Kelsy’s idea as it’ll be the man alternative to Valentines Day.

  10. brooklynbabe347 says:
    Thu, 19th Feb 20092:20 am 

    “I think we need a new public holiday. Women-in-bikinis,-ski-masks-and-carrying-power-tools Day.”

    I agree with Kelsy! :D

  11. Patty says:
    Fri, 21st Aug 20091:36 pm 

    True story!!!!!!

  12. private..lol says:
    Fri, 25th Sep 200910:56 pm 

    I think we need to have a month holiday called dont give men sex month.. Too many of us fall into their lies and have sex with them and make it tooo easy for them to never have to have any thought about how we feel when they are out chasing the next conquest..I dont believe anything a man says anymore..Most of them lie their butts off just to get sex then they either move on or come back to lie again and get more..Or worse, live with you or marry you and look at other women behind your back or cheat if they can get away with it..We as women are part of the problem for making it so easy for them..I think our grandmas had it easier than we do because grandma probably made the guy respect her and wait for it and prove his love first.

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