You know what I’ve always wanted to do? Pee standing up.
Seriously. Growing up with two brothers, I was always jealous of how quickly and easily they could rid themselves of their Yoo-Hoo juice boxes. I tried it a few times (I can’t believe I’m admitting this), but it was far from a success. Unless you consider washing the bathmat and changing my pants a success.
My desire for the speediness peeing standing up allowed only intensified with each passing bathroom line at a party. I attempted to use the men’s room many times – because there is never a line there – but the weird looks and disgusting floors became just too much for me. So I stopped. And I waited in line like a lady while my fellow squatters took their sweet ass time.
It is infuriating, boring and a total buzz kill. But it looks like it may be a problem no longer. Ladies, we can finally pee like the boys do.
Sarah Dillon, who is now officially my hero, created a product that allows women to go #1 without wasting all that time sittin’ down. It was originally created to help older women who were unable to sit due to knee or hip surgery, but she realized that younger and agile women could benefit from it too.
Now, instead of wasting all that time pulling down those tight jeans (or worse, tights), covering the seat in TP, sittin’ down and doing your thing, then squeezing back into your pants, you can simply whip this thing out and pee on your feet. Well, not literally on your feet, but you know what I’m saying.
The Go-Girl is cheap ($4.99), sterile, compact (fits in your purse!), and can be reused…if you really want to. Oh, and it’s pink. Tres chic!
The bathroom was the final frontier for bridging the gender gap and it we are finally there. And just in time, too. My birthday party is coming up and I do not want to waste any time at the bar standing in line.
GLEE TRAILER! GLEE TRAILER! GLEE GOES JAY-Z!
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Carla says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20091:16 pm
oof! just saw the photo and no thanks. id still rather sit.
Darcy says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20092:50 pm
This…is a recipe for disaster. Especially for drunk girls who won’t be able to aim or keep urine from overflowing. The only thing worse than standing in line is trying to holding your skirt under the hand dryer and hoping that your friends won’t notice the smell
Stephanie says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20095:43 pm
Just freakin’ squat .. .
Winnie says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20095:55 pm
In the end guys have to pee sitting down too when they realize how comfy it is to do so. :p
vi says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20096:28 pm
LOL! I thought this was a joke. That’s terrible. and funny. Genius
vi says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20097:35 pm
BTW Lauren, I adore you! Your writing is flippin’ fabulous: witty with just the right touch of humor and sarcasm, my favorite =)
Lucy says:
Wed, 18th Feb 20099:25 pm
Gross! Then can you imagine after you piss in it that you have to continue to carry it around with you? I agree, I’d rather sit.
D. says:
Thu, 19th Feb 20092:24 am
I can already pee standing up…Is that weird?
patrick says:
Thu, 19th Feb 200911:14 am
ok, your in a bar, your talking to a guy and you start needing the loo so you turn and look towards the toilet and see a giant que. so not wanting to leave this guy standing there bored you whip out ur ‘pee-pod’ shuv it in your groin and go
then what?
cause once you’re finished you’re stood there with what is essentially a bowl full of piss. so
then you have to wait in line for the bathroom to pour it down the loo.
if the pissing in front of him into a bowl didn’t put him off im sure the long wait will
it be simpler to get a sex change and use the men’s.
LCallahan says:
Thu, 19th Feb 200912:31 pm
so freakin gross.
you put the piss covered thing back into your nice handbag??
so now the essentials for a night out are cell phone, lipgloss, camera, and pee? ewwwwwwww
Alex says:
Thu, 19th Feb 20098:03 pm
You don’t actually carry around pee. The tip I’m fairly certain is where pee comes out in a nice little stream, and then you rinse it off or it comes with a nice little waterproof carrying case for rinsing off later. If it was created so you could pee in a cup, why wouldn’t you just pee in any old cup?
Talmanes says:
Thu, 19th Feb 200910:55 pm
Christ you people are stupid.
mal says:
Fri, 20th Feb 200912:15 am
ummm has anyone seen the “shenis?” google it. some crazy woman actually made a penis for women for the sake of peeing standing up. and this woman is crazy… like there is this gross instructional video…its nuts…
Sally says:
Fri, 13th Mar 20091:41 pm
finally at last we are free!!!!!
GoGirl says:
Fri, 20th Mar 20093:26 pm
Lauren…You are our HERO! Thanks for the story
Lauren says:
Tue, 14th Apr 20099:26 pm
i would just totally just want to sit instead of peeing into a thing and pouring in a urinal or sink!
Lauren says:
Tue, 14th Apr 20099:26 pm
Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Michael Moody says:
Sun, 14th Jun 20091:49 am
TraciAnn peeing on this first men’s urine machine at men’s bathroom. It is crazy. She is had a loo front of me.
kitty says:
Sun, 5th Jul 20091:45 am
I think this is awesome! I’d way rather deal with getting a drop of my own peepee on my hands then sitting on loads of someone elses. And what isn’t mentioned in this article is that it folds up completely into a small compact bottle. I would of killed to have one of these tonight when at an outdoors event- my only option was a porta potty- ISH! they’re disease ridden. And anyone on here who thinks it’s ‘gross’ has probably never even looked at their girly parts anyway… stop being so narrow minded.
June says:
Sat, 11th Jul 20097:30 am
ROFL This is too good. but yeah carryin it and pouring it and all sounds a bit gross. but this is good when u’ve had a bit too much to drink and there is a big queue. But i’d jus suggest all u girls to fake ur period to break the line…. jus claim that your tampon’s leaking
always works for me
inothercultureseveryonesquats says:
Sun, 12th Jul 200910:09 am
In many other cultures in the world, both men and woman squat to do both number 1 and 2. Due to the way that clothing is made/worn, that is a necessity. Its only in the last century in western civilization have western toilets been invented, and consequently used unisex.
BTW, if you woman are taking your time, how will it make any difference whether you take your sweet ass time standing up or sitting?
And as a male, I sit to piss all the time. Its no big deal, why are you making it such?
Bridgette says:
Wed, 22nd Jul 200911:18 pm
Since when was squating that hard?
genny says:
Sat, 2nd Jan 20104:39 pm
omg thius is a great idea hello pee standing hello you can expierience that u have what guys have in between there legs
dont squat stand!!
i love piss girls says:
Mon, 23rd Aug 20101:41 am
i like to watch pissing girls its hot i love to sitting piss
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