5 Great Spring Break Beach Reads

March 6, 2009 9:00 am     Posted in Cool Stuff, spring break  Amanda - Reed g+ page

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By Amanda

So Spring Break is coming. Hellooooo, beach! For those of you out there who won’t be spending all day getting boozed (you can’t imagine anything more horrendous than the mixture of heavy alcohol, sun, and waves), you are going to need some beach entertainment. And soberly watching drunk people bury each other in the sand gets boring after day one.

So, here is a handy list of books to bring with you to your tropical destination this year. They’re not your typical cheesy chick lit for the most part, but they’re pretty addictive in their own rights.

1. The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

I cannot say enough good things about this book. Kostova is like Dan Brown in the sense that she crafts engrossing and fascinating historically based thrillers. Except she’s not as crappy a writer and into vampires. As potentially lame as that sounds, it’s not: it’s a sort of modern retelling of the story of Dracula. It all starts when a grad student finds an old book with a dragon in the middle, and goes to show his mentor who has a similar book. He tells him of the research he did and what he discovered about Vlad Ţepeş (whom Dracula is based off of), and advises him to avoid looking into it. The next day the mentor goes missing, and the grad student embarks on a journey throughout Europe to find his professor. Sort of makes you want to travel throughout Eastern Europe instead of sitting on a beach, but whatever.

2. Twilight by Stephanie Meyer

Before you bite my head off, hear me out. I was once a fervent objector to the Twilight series. I thought they sounded moronic and childish. After being told for the umpteenth time to read it, however, I did. I was planning on skimming through and picking out the dumbest parts for laughs later. But something else happened – I liked it. Yes, Stephanie Meyer is a terrible author (seriously, how many times can you use the word “chagrin” in one chapter?). Yes, there is serious lack of juicy detail which makes reading about Bella and Edward’s hookups infuriating. And yes, Bella is a whiny bitch. But you have to give Stephanie Meyer credit – that lady knows how to keep people reading. There is something inexorably addictive about the series, despite its faults. I know you’re rolling your eyes, but I really suggest you try it.

3. The Virgin’s Lover by Phillippa Gregory

If you couldn’t tell by my first recommendation, I sort of have a thing for historical based stuff. Especially when it involves a kickass female protagonist, a time period with lots of pretty dresses and romance. If you’ve already seen or read The Other Boleyn Girl, you know what I mean. Normally this stuff is pretty boring when reading it in some dry history book, but Gregory makes it interesting by adding more drama and, er, passion. This book is about Queen Elizabeth, and her secret affair with Sir Robert Dudley. Dudley is sort of a player and feeds off other people (for money, power, booty, what have you), but because he’s just so sexy Elizabeth can’t resist him, and this leads to a lot of problems. It’s way better than it sounds, and once you get into it you can’t put it down.

4. The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by Jean-Dominique Bauby

Jean-Dominique Bauby was the French editor of Elle, had a hot girlfriend, lots of money, an awesome car and two cute kiddies. One day he suffered a massive stroke that left him completely paralyzed. The only thing he was able to do was blink his left eye (the condition being called “locked-in syndrome”). While in the hospital, he was able to write a memoir with his speech therapist by using a frequency ordered alphabet, and blinked every time the letter he wanted was reached. Despite this, Bauby is still able to imagine the world in vivid detail, and he ended up writing a hauntingly beautiful book. It is surprisingly light, funny and rather short. And although it is sad (he died four days after its publication in France), it is not overwhelmingly so: it’s more of a testament to the undying soul and a celebration of life.

5. Anything by David Sedaris (Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, Barrel Fever, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, and Naked).

Nothing further. Although I’d suggest sitting away from other humans while reading his books, since you will most likely be snorting out loud and have everyone staring at you. Or maybe that’s just me.

There you have it. I (almost) guarantee you will be completely into these books – I know I was. Tell me what you think of them!

24 Comments on "5 Great Spring Break Beach Reads"

  1. Mel says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20094:49 am 

    Haha I totally agree with you on Twilight. I refused to read it but finally caved over winter break and read all four books in four days. But everything you said is true. It's bad…but so good.

  2. Eliza says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20095:13 am 

    David Sedaris is amazing, he is so funny, but in a completely unexpected way.

  3. Alison says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20095:17 am 

    I think Twilight is a terrible book, but the character of Edward is genius and I think that's what makes the books so damn popular!

  4. kat says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20096:13 am 

    I was seriously disappointed with the Historian. I found it overly long and a bit anti-climactic. I want my vampires sexy, dark, and brooding — not archivists

  5. maddie says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20096:54 am 

    thank you for recommending david sedaris!! he is my favorite author. i recommend anyone to spend the money and go see him read, it's absolutely hilarious and he almost always reads things he hasn't published yet. the last reading i was at he read from his own journal!

    i also agree with you about twilight. frankly i loved the series but the only thing about it is, you lose interest after you finish the book if you don't have the next one waiting. i never read the fourth one (and heard it wasn't worth it anyway). but it was an addicting read while it lasted. one thing that turned me off though? there are typos in EVERY BOOK. doesn't this woman have an editor?!

  6. jes says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20097:35 am 

    I personally love Dean Koontz and Patricia Cornwell for mstery/thrillers…

    Cornwell's Scarpetta series books are dark, but oh so good!! 'Blow Fly' is awesome.

  7. Mazuba says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20097:41 am 

    I love love Twilight .And Patricia Cornwell and Dean Koontz.I used 2 think the whole twilight thing was hyped up ,but when I read it ,I fell in love with it.Im reading the whole series over !

  8. Kelcie says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20098:48 am 

    I really enjoyed The Historian although it was a bit slow at times, but it definitely made me want to backpack across eastern europe.

  9. katharine says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20099:06 am 

    While I have never read The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, if it is anything like the movie, then it's fantastic.

  10. Amanda - Reed Colleg says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20099:37 am 

    kat – yes, i will agree it was slow at times, but i feel as though it's one of those books you have to force yourself to read in order to fully appreciate. to each his/her own.

    katherine – it's exactly like the movie. i actually saw the movie first before reading the book, but now i prefer the book over the movie. either way, it's a great memoir.

  11. Elise says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 200910:52 am 

    My main problem with Twilight wasn't the writing– I mean, have any of y'all read Eragon? Good God– but rather the overwhelmingly creepy, manipulative, and disturbing relationship between Bella and Edward. If you're going to have a human/vampire relationship, creepiness is a given, but not this kind of creepiness.

    This is the sort of creepy you get from a high-school relationship with a guy who's cripplingly jealous and yet treats you like a lesser being, 'loves' you because you're beautiful and smell like food (?), and seems to have the emotional stability and maturity of a twelve-year-old boy who thinks his parents are oppressing him, despite being really really old.

    Vampires are hot when there's an element of power to them, when they're more than capable of toying with their mortal lovers, and when their lust for blood and their lust for flesh is believably balanced. Edward couldn't manipulate his way out of a paper bag, and poor confused Bella bears the brunt of his bipolarity. Twilight just feels like a long tribute to Why Women Should Put Up with Emotional Abuse.

    Sigh. Read Neil Gaiman's 'Graveyard Book' instead– it's written for a young age bracket, but then so was Twilight, and you won't have to force yourself to read or enjoy it.

  12. Elise says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 200910:54 am 

    That said, oh my god Virgin's Lover. If you read anything this month, make it this book.

  13. Hatti says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 200911:24 am 

    I totally agree about the Twilight series, I refused to read them until I was bored one day at my dad's and picked up my little sister's copy of Twilight. I ended up reading all 4 books in 3 weeks.

    Love Phillipa Gregory, haven't read that one though.

  14. Ace says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 200912:19 pm 

    Oh yes Twilight is so awesome especially the part in Breaking Dawn when Bella considers covering up her bruises. I love any series that normalizes domestic abuse and stalker-like behavior. Oh, and especially when Meyers romanticizes the controlling man.

  15. Annie says:
    Fri, 6th Mar 20092:59 pm 

    I read Twilight with an open mind and find it absolutely disgusting for all the already mentioned reasons. It seriously needs to be banned; its beyond wrong for teenagers to say the only boy they could ever love is one like Edward- and they're being entirely serious.

    Read Dean Koontz instead. There's a great little used book store at the beach I go to that has tons of his books..

    Try the first few Anita Blake novels if you're looking for vampires. At least Ms. Hamilton writes well- and her love triangle is far sexier.

  16. Ace says:
    Sat, 7th Mar 20096:16 am 

    I am completely against censorship, however, I think there ought to be serious discussions about Twilight. Certainly teenagers can benefit from an open dialogue about controlling relationships and how sometimes when we are manipulated we are oblivious to it.

  17. Amanda - Reed Colleg says:
    Sat, 7th Mar 20099:20 am 

    okay well..in my defense as well as everyone else who commented on this saying they liked twilight, i will say this: obviously in hindsight these things do make sense, but for the most part while reading the books you don't think of that stuff the first time. you may be right, but i don't think that was actually stephanie meyer's intention. plus i honestly think she's not intellectual enough to think of that. she wouldn't be writing twilight if she was doing that on purpose, she'd be writing some anti-abuse book.

  18. Amanda - Reed Colleg says:
    Sat, 7th Mar 200911:47 am 

    you make some good points and i'm not saying i disagree (in fact i do agree now), but don't attack me on this. i mean, did i not say twilight has its faults? this falls into that category of faults. it's not perfect, and obviously neither am i (not that i even thought than in the first place) since everyone is now criticizing me for this. trust me, even though i maybe didn't pick up on the same little nuances of abuse and such that everyone else did, i did still find it creepy in a number of ways (the obsessive high school relationship, the fact that real people have such a crazy fixation with it).

    but seriously guys, the whole point of this post was just for books that are somewhat fun for some people to read on the beach. i respect whatever your feelings on twilight are, but for some people who don't view it the way you guys do it's a guilty pleasure and something entertaining to read once in a while. i know you may think people who find the books enjoyable are idiots because they don't see it the way you do, but is that any reason to jump down their throats?

    instead of just saying what's wrong with twilight and why it shouldn't be on this list, why don't you give some other suggestions (like annie)? i think we'd all be willing to hear them and give them a try.

  19. Elise says:
    Sat, 7th Mar 200912:50 pm 

    Ouch. I hope you know I wasn't attacking you, Amanda– you're far from the only person who's really enjoyed Twilight, and you've already pointed out that you're not just enjoying it blindly. (As I said above, I've actually read Eragon without dying, so I can't see people complaining about Twilight's writing while Christopher Paolini remains unsterilized.)

    The reason I (and probably a lot of other girls) feel so strongly about Twilight is that the vast majority of serious Twilight fans are totally unaware of some of the undertones. It doesn't reflect on them at all– most of them don't recognize it because most of them haven't been in that kind of situation, and I hope they never are.

    But as I said above, I think everybody should read Twilight. There are things to be enjoyed in it, and learning to enjoy a book while still recognizing negative or dangerous influences in it is what separates fundamentalist book-burners from people who can read Clockwork Orange without raping anybody (i.e. almost everybody).

    Just… in a society where girls are constantly being told that their entire worth is wrapped up in their weight, cup size, and ability to attract a man, it's important that they recognize when there's a lie behind the entertainment. And that was my goal in commenting: to point out the lie, so that readers are less likely to swallow it. I definitely wasn't intending to attack you.

    Also, if your posts are capable of generating nine-paragraph dissertations and more argument than a standard session of Congress, count yourself a successful blogger. When you feel like somebody's calling you names, remember– you made them feel strongly, maybe even think about what they believe, and that means you have an influence over them, whatever they think of you.

    Keep up the good work. Oh, and if you're on the lookout for more kickass books, your tastes and mine seem to overlap a lot– I could send you a list to sample if you're interested.

  20. Elise says:
    Sat, 7th Mar 20094:07 pm 

    That’s pretty much the problem, Amanda. The character of Edward seems to be made up of all the best, most dramatic, most gothic-romantic parts of all the abusive boyfriends since Lord Byron. He makes it okay for girls to lust after that guy they thought they could change, to remember past abusive relationships in a positive, nostalgic light, and even to look forward to finding a guy whose uncontrollable mood swings and inability to communicate will give them the delicious emotional agony Bella experiences.

    Because Meyer hasn’t dealt with the psychological issues of what she’s putting into this book (and, obviously, idealizing), she portrays it as the perfect, romanticized dream. And she’s very good at capturing the desirable stress of an early relationship– wondering if your feelings are reciprocated, fumbling through the mess of learning to be together, and generally getting high off the hormones.

    The problem with Edward, then, is like the problem you face when you start to realize your newfound crush doesn’t have anything beyond that gorgeous smile. Turns out the confusion of their first learning experiences will never go away, because Edward is almost certifiably manic-depressive. The feelings he instills in Bella won’t grow beyond awe over his beauty (oh god, his beauty, he is SO BEAUTIFUL, oh beautiful Edward etc), and his feelings for her never get quite past ‘ownership’, at least not as far as he can communicate them.

    There are lots of people who hate on Twilight because of its awful writing. Well, it’s awful. Doesn’t stop it from being enjoyable.

    What disturbs me is that, without fail, every girl I know who has actually recovered from an abusive relationship (and I mean to the point where she’s not going to find another one next week– actually recovered) has told me how horrible it was, reading about a guy who reminded them so much of The Ex. We felt terrible for poor deluded Bella, sympathetic for all the well-meaning friends and family she blows off in favor of the New Master, and utterly outraged by the progression of their relationship.

    Honestly, rather than banning the book, I think we should make it required reading… followed by serious discussions about emotional and physical abuse, and the ways in which people can use others’ love to get away with their own issues scot-free. If more girls learned to recognize– and avoid– Edward, there would be fewer girls in the world who had to conceal their bruises.

  21. Laeri says:
    Sun, 8th Mar 20095:19 am 

    I absolutely LOVE Philippa Gregory! I love her books (and I hate History XD).

    One of the first books I'd ever read by her was "The Queen's Fool" and I was instantly hooked!

  22. Ace says:
    Sun, 8th Mar 200910:43 am 

    Alright, so here's a list of some books which are great which aren't the most obvious:

    The Book Thief by Marcus Zusak, seriously this book is amazing. It's about a young girl named Liesel in Germany during WWII. She steals books. Oh and it's narrated by death. The prose is simply moving.

    Jessica Z by Shawn Klomparens another fantastic book about a girl named Jessica Zorich, she basically has two realtionships and lives in San Francisco. There are terrorist attacks going on, but it is basically a backdrop to the story. If you want something that makes your chest tighten with emotion read this book.

  23. Ace says:
    Sun, 8th Mar 200910:44 am 

    Well, lol, not quite a list, just two books, but they are so good, they really should make the list!

  24. Brittany says:
    Sun, 8th Mar 200910:57 pm 

    I think we have the same taste.

    If you love David Sedaris books, you should get them on CD or on iTunes. He reads the books himself, making it ten times more funny!!!

    Also, I loooooove anything by Philippa Gregory!

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