The Pissed List: Dakota Fanning Weirds Me out, True or False?

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupidity of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone etiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce.

By Kari

So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortunate road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Landscapers: Ok guys, I understand that you’ve got a lot of ground to cover (no pun intended) and that requires you to start the day extra early to please all of your clients, one of whom happens to be the landlord of my apartment. I have no problem with you guys manicuring the lawn (because the thought of operating any type of lawnmower scares the living crap out of me–wierd childhood fear), but I do have trouble justifying the fact that you come at 7 am every. single. Monday. Coincidentally, 7 is four hours earlier than I ever plan on waking up on a Monday. I’m sure you can understand why it could be difficult to sleep through someone weedwhacking right under my window. On the bright side, you do wake me up early enough to possibly be a productive citizen, so I actually didn’t mind my chainsaw alarm last Monday when it got me to go to the library earlier–until I walked outside and got dirt in my eyes from the huge clouds you stirred up with the leafblowers. Will you never let me have my peace!?

Tricky Ass Midterm Questions: You know when you get the breakdown for an exam ahead of time and you see that there’s a 30 question True/ False section? You know how AWESOME that is? Ok, then you also know the confusion and frustration that come along with realizing how freaking tricky your professor is. Yes, you memorized specific dates, names and details, but when you memorized the Byzantine Empire’s obsession with the color purple and your teacher throws the word “puce” into her question, what the hell are you supposed to do?! All of a sudden you’re questioning the double meaning behind all of her questions. Then you panic and rush through the section carelessly T and F-ing your way to a C-… Why can’t we all just rely on multiple choice?

Perfect Beach Days When You’re Landlocked: So I know that complaining about sunshine and blue skies probably earns me a lot of enemies still shoveling snow after this week’s Nor’Easter, but let me just tell you that living in the Sunshine State is pointless if you’re hours from any kind of beach and locked in a library. Looking out the window and imagining the countdown to Spring Break is pure torture when the closest thing to the Sea is your Marine Bio exam. You keep trying to push through your midterm studying to inch closer to Margaritaville, but that feat is incredibly difficult when the entire climate is mocking you.

Dakota Fanning: I’ve always felt that the best way to sum up my feelings towards Dakota Fanning is through Amy Poehler’s SNL skit about her. She was pretty cute in Uptown Girls. She’s a talented kid, but that still doesn’t explain the weird vibe I get from her. Like she knows something I don’t. Like after completing a Scooby Doo sequel she’ll enroll in Yale and later become head of the C.I.A. Anyway, her portrayal of the little girl who was molested creeped the hell out of me, and her new role in that superhero movie was as annoying as her superior sounding tone. And Coraline? Awesome…but creepy. And now my good friend Perez has informed me that she’ll be expanding her realm of sketchiness with a role in the latest Twilight movie. She will be playing a vampire though, so I can’t decide if her creepiness may just be completely appropriate. Thoughts?