The City: Olivia Doesn’t Know English

I’d like to start off with an apology for not recapping the world’s worst TV show The City last week. Not only did I not want to watch it, but I also found myself unable to turn away from the Bachelor finale and After The Final Rose ….even though I never watched one episode of that show all season!

By Lauren

Before I knew it, it was 11pm and I had missed not only The City, but my evening shower as well.

I don’t really know what I missed last week, but I have a feeling none of that matters, especially after watching the major dramz from tonight’s episode. Big things! And I’m not talking about Olivia’s mastery of the English language in her DVF meeting. She sure wowed those bigwigs with her creation of the word “multipletude,” and use of such key PR phrases as, “Has globally has relevance,” and “you can see a longevity towards it.”

Beautiful. I’ve never laughed harder. Or felt more uncomfortable. It was almost like watching Meet The

Parents, only with a lot more designer clothing.

As much as I enjoyed that 3 minute segment (of a 22 minute show), all the real drama in the episode revolved around Whitney and Jay.

Now, up until this point in the season I found myself believing and loving everything Jay said in that sexy Australian accent, but not tonight. I don’t care what syllable he puts the emphasis on, Jay is just another douchey guy toying with a nice girl’s heart.

And Whitney finally realized! (See, she was paralyzed by the accent too!) In the realest moment we’ve seen all season, Whitney opens up to Erin about her issues with Jay.

“I don’t even know if he likes me.”

It’s as if all of the little things Jay has done throughout their relationship never registered but now, finally, as she says every little thing out loud, Whitney finally realizes how awful Jay has been to her. It was sad and heartbreaking to watch. I mean, we’ve all been there – in love with someone who just doesn’t treat us the way we want to be treated. And we make excuse after excuse for them, only to wake up one day and realize that the relationship (or whatever it is) really isn’t worth fighting for.

Of course Jay doesn’t believe that he’s done anything wrong and, once again, turns everything around to make Whitney feel crazy and wrong.

“I constantly feel like I’m doing something wrong.”

Well, Jay, maybe that’s because you are. Maybe flirting with other girls, lying to your girlfriend and hiding the fact that you are going on tour are not the best and most honest things for a boyfriend to do. Maybe if you stopped for a second you’d realize that your girlfriend is not weak (“I feel like you just have to be a little bit stronger”) but has just been naïve and extremely lenient with all your bullsh*t.

And, while we’re at it, maybe you should realize that your band sorta sucks and that tour is going to bring you nothing but a few pair of dirty panties (probably Heidi Montag’s) thrown onto the stage.

The truth is, Jay never wanted to work things out or talk things out with Whitney. The reason he never told her he was going on tour was not because of how she’d react, but because he didn’t want to be dumped and homeless for a month before he left. Jay went to Whit’s apartment that last night in hopes that she’d break up with him because he’s far too much of a pussy to break up with her. When she didn’t, he was forced to take charge…and then run out of her apartment before he could see her cry.

Maybe it’s Jay who needs to be a little bit stronger.