Dear Library People,
SHUT UP. Holy crap. If you are talking on your cell phone, talking really loudly to your best friend, or just talking because you adore the sound of your own voice so much that you can’t seem to close your mouth, for the love of God, just stop.
I don’t care if you’re doing continual stage whispers. I don’t care if you’re on the first floor, where nobody does real studying. I don’t care if the library is the only place you ever run into your old roommate, so it’s the only possible place you can catch her up on all the gossip from last weekend. I’m sorry; you are out of luck. The library is not your social scene, and I will personally come and extract you from the building if you continue to obnoxiously make noise.
Yes, I get that you need a break from your studying. I understand that you have had a stressful week. I even grasp that maybe I should just chill out and stop taking my own work so seriously. But that’s just too bad. The library is my sanctuary, and until you opened your big mouth, I could count on being there in peace and quiet. So unless you want me to run at you with a huge needle and some surgical thread, take your conversations elsewhere! The weather is getting warm again, and it’s at most a 50-pace distance to the glorious outdoors, where you can talk to your heart’s content.
Thank you for understanding my frustration at your blatant disregard for anyone except yourself.