Sexy Time: Get to Know the Big O

April 30, 2009     Posted in Relationships, Sex

bigoLast weekend, I had the best orgasm of my life. (I apologize for the over-share, but it really needed to be said.) Days later, as I was thinking about that episode for the 258th time, I realized that I don’t really know much about my best friend, the orgasm. Thus, like a true writer, I just had to do some digging to find out what The Big O was all about. Here are some of the more interesting – and obscure – information out there.

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Why do we orgasm?: Truth be told, nobody actually knows for sure. Some say that it encourages patience from your partner because we take so damn long to climax. Others say that the exhaustive effects of orgasm keep the woman horizontal, and thus, keep the sperm from “falling out” of the woman. I don’t need to tell you that both of those have been ruled out as possible reasons for the Big O. Newer theories suggest that orgasm increases the probability of conception and/or the frequency of sex. Honestly, I don’t really care why, where, when and who it happens with as long as it gets the job done.

Orgasm spontaneity: Some women have reported orgasms as a result of non-sexual activity. Climax can be induced by riding a bike or certain types of exercise. Any activity that tightens the pelvic muscles, including yawning and sneezing, may induce spontaneous orgasm. I’m thinkin’ I may just skip my dose of allergy medication today…

Don’t fake it: In one study, 49% of women interviewed admit to having faked an orgasm at least once. And believe me, we’re good at it (If you don’t believe me, watch this clip from When Harry Met Sally). According to experts, however, faking climax may give your partner the wrong idea of what you want. For instance, say that you fake an orgasm to get your boyfriend to stop sucking on your toe. Once you pretend you like it, I promise you he will be all over that toe every single time you hook up thereafter. Instead, just tell the guy what you like and you won’t have to waste your incredible acting skills on an audience of one.

Orgasms are good for your health: Various studies have found regular orgasms to be associated with: heightened sense of smell, reduced risk of cardiovascular disease, weight loss and body fitness, reduced depression, less bodily pain, a heightened immune system, more bladder control, and healthier teeth. (Editor’s note: Healthier teeth!?) Remember, all of these benefits are definitely not worth the risk of contracting a STI, so make sure he wraps it up before you get your daily dose of booty.

We can never have too much sex: Unfortunately, men are not so lucky. While sex firms our buns, tones our abs, and improves our posture, it has been known to cause “penile damage” to our male counterparts. According to an article on MSNBC, “Penile tissues, if given too roistering or prolonged a pummeling, can sustain damage.” So next time a guy calls you selfish for not “returning the favor” just tell him you’re really just trying to protect him from the tragic effects of a penile pummeling.

12 Comments on "Sexy Time: Get to Know the Big O"
  1. Candie says:
    Thu, 30th Apr 20096:53 am 

    LOL at penile pummeling.

  2. Kristina says:
    Thu, 30th Apr 20099:12 am 

    "Penile pummeling" is my new favorite phrase. Such a shame that I'll probably never find cause to say it in a conversation.

  3. sayed says:
    Thu, 30th Apr 200911:23 am 

    Thanx. I think somehow you made me concious and a little bit confused too. Now its a matter to see whether I could remember your article during my orgasm or not !

  4. Joe the Drunk says:
    Thu, 30th Apr 20094:20 pm 

    my lady says she has an orgasm when I bone her but she just lays there like a limp fish. I think she is faking it. I need to practice with a woman who really likes sex. Any volunteers?

  5. Sarah says:
    Fri, 1st May 20099:28 am 

    Joe,

    Your sn of choice is enough to send many ladies running. You might want to reconsider it next time you ask for sexy-time handouts…lol.

  6. Sarah says:
    Fri, 1st May 20099:29 am 

    Also, sorry to hear about your limp fish girlfriend. :/

    Perhaps talk to her and ask why she won't get into it more. Either she's self-conscious or she's not entirely enjoying herself. Discussion and communication are key. ;)

    Or just stick with your original plan and find other women to "practice with." hahaha.

  7. tightie says:
    Sat, 2nd May 20096:00 pm 

    Pummel, hmmm…

    http://tightie.wordpress.com/2009/03/29/in_the_as…

  8. O says:
    Sat, 9th May 200910:56 pm 

    Wow, just look at ScreamOMG.com for HELP!

  9. j-bone says:
    Sun, 10th May 20097:48 am 

    over the years i have dated a variety of athletic or sport oriented women.one gal however enjoyed riding horses, one day i planned to surprise her.i came around the corner of the arena, her not knowing i was present and to my astonishment here she was up in that saddle, head leaning back,and all of sudden scream and some moaning going on,it was over.she noticed me out of the corner of her eye and smiled.we talked about the occurance and she said,having me as her man was the next best thing to that private orgasm in the soddle.

  10. So... says:
    Tue, 8th Sep 200911:16 pm 

    You're kind of a cunt. If a man asks for a returned favor, LITERALLY suck it up.

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