I’m Torn: The Real Housewives
May 4, 2009 Posted in Reality
Life isn’t black and white. As much as we wish we simply loved or hated things, there is often that whole annoying gray area in the middle. Like how we love the idea of a monokini, but we just don’t know if we can pull it off. Or how we love making money babysitting, but hate giving up a Saturday night. Damn you, gray area; you make decision-making that much more complicated!]
Anyone who knows me knows not to call on Tuesday nights. Not only is it Biggest Loser night, but it also happens to be the best night of my week because of one thing only: The Real Housewives. I don’t care if they are from Orange County, Hot-lanta or New York, I can’t get enough of these women.
Yet now that The Real Housewives of New Jersey are on the (polluted) horizon, I’m starting to feel a little confused inside about my love for couture catfights and $16,000 handbags.
Yes, ladies, I’m torn. It’s time to break it all down.
Love It:
Rich women doing fabulous things and talking about one another behind everyone’s backs? It’s like my dream life. I’m really good at the sh*t talking, but I’m seriously lacking in the Chanel bags and Louboutin heels, so it’s nice to live out my dreams through a Bravo TV show. And the drama, while totally blown out of proportion, is just so addicting. Whoever casts this show did a fantastic job of bringing far too many Type A women into one social circle, ultimately leading to many a manicured claw fights.
And could there be anything more entertaining than watching Evil Vicki trip and fall down a stair? Or Nay Nay making fun of her tranny bff, Kim? Or Bethenny (attempting to) open a can of ‘tude on Kelly Bensimon? Short answer: no. There is nothing better. Because drama in your social circle is never fun, but watching rich women drown themselves in it is the best thing since $5 footlongs at Subway.
Loathe It:
I like to think that I’m sorta smart, so I’m embarrassed to not only watch this show, but be totally addicted to it. And know every last detail. Including what kind of heels Jill’s daughter wanted to pack for her summer abroad. (Marc Jacobs. Pathetic, I know.)
Shouldn’t I be watching documentaries on Discovery Channel, or some weird show on TLC? And should I really be contributing to the further success of these rich-tards? With the exception of a few (Bethenny, for sure), these women contribute nothing to society except a few photos for Page 6 and a reason for my mother to call me at 9am on a Saturday to discuss the episode she just watched on her DVR.
We should be giving our attention to people who actually impact our world in a positive way, instead of these useless women who do nothing but lunch and shop and bitch. And then wake up the next day to do it all again. Yes, some of them work, but many of them just marry rich and set an example that money and wealth is the key to happiness. Is that true? Maybe. But is that realistic? Hell no.
And I can’t ignore the fact that this show takes my blood pressure to unhealthy levels. Without fail I end up on my feet (thus dumping my evening snack of dry Kashi Go Lean! all over my floor) yelling at the TV. These women are ridiculous and I can’t handle watching them say and do the dumbest sh*t! And now my snack is on the floor! And now I’m angry at myself because I care so much about this! And now I have to pause it so I can clean up the mess I just made.
Roar!
I know that it’s just a show and I should enjoy it if I want to, but watching this show gives these women power and success they really do not deserve. Is my guilty pleasure really worth elevating these label whores to a higher level, wasting precious cereal and potentially giving me wrinkles?
I just don’t know. I’m totally torn!
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Amanda says:
Mon, 4th May 20098:59 am
OMG I totally agree with everything you just said. In fact my friend sent me this article and said she had thought I had written it. It's so true – this show is like a train wreck – you can't turn away. I totally know all the details and live vicariously through them (one day I'll own a pair of Louboutins!!). I probably should be watching something more intellectually stimulating, but I just can't help it. Reality TV is one of my guilty pleasures. I'm so sad the finale is tomorrow, but will definitely be watching the New Jersey girls claw at each other!
icantstopwatching says:
Mon, 4th May 200910:11 am
Can't wait for Real Housewives of New Jersey. It's gonna be hilarious, judging by this video:
http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new…
Jess says:
Mon, 4th May 200912:45 pm
With you 100%-from watching Biggest Loser to hating giving effing Jill the exposure she effing signed up for this show for. AHHH.
BUT-I can tell you something that WILL make you feel better:
I'm interning in NY right now, and EVERYBODY (even my boss) watches this show. It is discussed like the news. So…
move to NY and no more stigma
Ellie says:
Mon, 4th May 20095:47 pm
Not all of Jersey is polluted. In fact, most of Jersey is just like everywhere else, but thanks, Lauren.
icantstopwatching says:
Tue, 5th May 200911:55 am
Looking forward to tonight's Real Housewives of New York finale. Looks like they're doing a simulcast over at BravoTV.com, where you can chat with other fans during the show.
http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new…
Jodie says:
Thu, 7th May 20098:44 am
I tried to watch this show but I couldn't stand they're harsh NYC accents. Not only that they are neurotic and make a big deal out of asinine things. The are about as exciting as watching paint dry. The only two that don't completely annoy me are Luann and Kelly. The rest are extremely nerve racking. I can just imagine what The Real Housewive of New Jersey are going to be like. More dull, boring women with even more annoying accents.
Lovin it! says:
Thu, 7th May 200910:58 am
I feel ashamed when I speak of the show but let me tell you – I won't dare to miss it! I completely agree with everything you say, but at least the New York women fundraise and donate their time..the women in Orange County just spend money and talk about spending money (can't stop watching it either though).. I'm from Jersey so I can't wait for the season premiere!
Gary Susman says:
Wed, 13th May 200912:54 pm
More Real Housewives of New York goodness, seen on last night's reunion show: http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new… and <a href="http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new-york-city/videos/voting-off"
Gary Susman says:
Wed, 13th May 200912:55 pm
Oops, that should be http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new…
Jodie says:
Thu, 14th May 20097:24 am
Can't wait to see the 5 Guidos from Jersey's upcoming shows. Especially when the one that looks like a Guido E.T.(I think her names Theresa) turns over the table, like she's the Hulk. Is she gonna bust out of her clothes and turn green too? Gonna be funny!
Erin says:
Mon, 25th May 20094:59 pm
Man you people are idiots – go live in the ghetto if wana see some shit
Kelly says:
Mon, 25th May 20099:11 pm
I totally love Orange County, because yeah they can be bitchy and really orange from tanning, but if you watch the season 4 finale, they all have grown up a little and changed and it really made me cry to hear at the end what they had to say. Atlanta is just ghetto, and New York was okay. Lots of annoying fighting from Jill seriously. We don’t really get to see their lives in depth as much as you do in Orange County. The Real Housewives of New Jersey is new and I like it a lot. It’s behind OC in my faves.. I’m from New Jersey and the women are all crazy and fun! There seems to be drama, but there also seems to be good people like Jackqueline and we really get to know about her and her emotional struggle to have a baby. We never saw any of that on NY or ATL – only drama and fighting from much older women. Bring back OC and Viva NJ!