Girl Crush: Chelsea Handler

May 21, 2009 - 2:30 pm By Lauren - University of Michigan

chelsea-handler-4[There are some women out there that we just can’t get out of our minds. No, we aren’t switching teams - yet - but we do have some serious crushes on some pretty fierce females. These ladies are all special in their own right and we aren’t ashamed to tell the world we love them.]

I’m having a tough time admitting this, mostly because I think she stole my life, but I have a huge crush on Chelsea Handler. I was introduced to Ms. Handler a few years back when my friend shoved her first book, “My Horizontal Life” in my hands and screamed, “this was your idea!”

Yes, it’s true. I had always planned on compiling my one night stand stories into a book, but I needed a few more hump sessions to complete it and Chelsea beat me to it.

I wanted to so badly to hate what I read, but I couldn’t. The book was laugh out loud funny, and I’m pretty sure I bothered everyone else in Starbucks when I read the entire thing in one day. When I finally reached the end, I determined that Chelsea and I were soul mates.

Since then, Chelsea has written another NY Times Bestseller and got her very own show, Chelsea Lately, on E! Some people think she slept her way into that late night slot (her BF just happens to be in charge of the network), but I don’t care. If it took a little pork-sesh to bring this woman to TV, then so be it. If anything, it only proves that the woman is as good between the sheets as she is behind the round table.

Chelsea Handler is hilarious, beautiful, witty and has a killer sense of style. When I tune into her show nightly (I haven’t missed an episode in months), I am as entertained by what she says and does as I am by the gorgeous and drool-worthy stilettos on her feet. Stilettos that she uses to effectively stomp on the hopes, dreams and careers of Hollywood’s most ridiculous characters.

And even they find her funny.

Chelsea Handler proves that comedy isn’t just for the boys/ugly women. She’s the total package and if it takes sleeping with her to become her full-sized sidekick (she’s already got a mini-friend), I’ll do it. Maybe we could pen that story into a book together.

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18 Comments on "Girl Crush: Chelsea Handler"

  1. Kelly - Simmons College says:
    Thu, 21st May 20093:36 pm 

    I LOVE Chelsea. Her interviews are the best!

  2. Carrie says:
    Thu, 21st May 20093:41 pm 

    I’m obsessed too.

  3. Positively Present says:
    Thu, 21st May 20093:52 pm 

    Love, love, love Chelsea! I just saw her perform recently and she was AWESOME. I was laughing so much that I was sore the next day. And her books are awesome too. Def check ‘em out if you haven’t already.

    http://www.positivelypresent.com

  4. Amy says:
    Thu, 21st May 20095:26 pm 

    Are You There Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea is the funniest book I’ve ever read!

  5. Anna says:
    Thu, 21st May 200910:02 pm 

    Lauren, I like you,your articles are well written and you are quite funny. I do wonder though, do you get told frequently that you’re extremely full of yourself? I’m honestly curious. I love your self confidence and love, truly I do, but sometimes you make me roll my eyes with the things you say (write). Anywho, I completely agree with you that Chelsea Handler is awesome! Love her to death, and I could see you doing the same thing with your life. (the whole book, t.v. show, possibly sleeping with your boss to get those things done.)

  6. Alluv says:
    Fri, 22nd May 20092:01 am 

    OMG thank you for doing a blog on her!!! I’ve been following her since my junior year of highschool, and I absolutely love her!!!!! I also get to go to her show in two weeks!!!!!! Ahh, I’m so excited!… But seriously, it’s about time people start hearing her name , cause I went to a small private university, where we didn’t get cable, so I was deprived of Chelsea Lately, minus the Youtube and Hulu scraps I could find. I just bought “Are you there Vodka?…” last week, and am only about half way through it…but basically, I wish she was my best friend in kindergarden.

  7. Janie says:
    Fri, 22nd May 20097:59 am 

    How is Lauren being full of herself here? She’s talking about how great Chelsea Handler is. And I LOOOOVE Chelsea. LOVE HER.

  8. Lauren - University of Michigan says:
    Fri, 22nd May 20098:36 am 

    Thank you, Anna, for your observation. My mom tells me all the time that I’m full of myself, but if I don’t love me, who will? I like to think of myself as confident. I know what I’m good at and I work to perfect it. Maybe instead of cutting me down, you should support me and my quest for world domination. Girls gotta get eachother’s backs! Get my back!

  9. Anna says:
    Fri, 22nd May 20091:05 pm 

    Lauren,
    You mistake me. Firstly, I would like to apologize to you for being so rude and tactless, that was dumb. I’m truly sorry that I offended you. The reason why I asked you that was becasue my friends and I religiously read College Candy and they ALWAYS tell me that you and I are the same person, and then they often tell me I need to get overmyself since I’m so full of myself. So I was geniunely curious to see if you get told the same thing, especially by those close to you. I know that I probably shouldn’t of said anything. However, like I have already demonstrated, I’m often extremely tactless, to a fault. I’m sorry that were at the recieving end of my ‘tactless-ness’.

    Also, as weird as this may sound, I would like to applaud you on your response to my post. I would’ve said the exact same thing if I were in your place. I’m in complete agreement with you! Girls spend way too much time ripping each other apart, and instead should be building each other up. Just because I (and yourself) have accepted, am confident, and like,(scratch that, make it ABSOLUTELY LOVE) who I am doesn’t make it okay for others to give me “concerned” advice from a “friend”, which is code for snarky comments made to cut me down. Also, I’m (as are you) very good at what I do, and am not going to apologize for it and I’m going to keep perfecting my work until I become an expert in my field.

    That’s why I love that you choose Chelsea Handler as a girl crush! She lived her life her way made no apologies, and is now wildly successful for, essentially, being herself and not apologizing for it! Love it! Not gonna lie though, you totally made me roll my eyes when you said that she “stole” your idea for a book. I know you were joking, but still, as if! And I also know that I should learn my lesson and shouldn’t have
    just said that, but I suffer from chronic tactless foot-in-mouth syndrome and am not going to apologive for it. (amoung with the other hundreds of character flaws I have!)

    Do know that I L-O-V-E your columns and it is nice to find a writer who I can so easily relate to. You are extremely good at what you do and I am fully supportive of your quest for world domination! More likely than not, I’ll be right there with you fighting for my own world domination!

  10. Steph says:
    Fri, 29th May 200912:13 am 

    She is totally my soul mate, as well. I love her humor, honesty, fashion, and human qualities (like stumbling over her words). She’s simply fabulous.

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