We’re back with another edition of G.W.W.E. (Guys We Wanna Eff)!

Please take a look at Ben Stiller. The man is a perfect specimen–striking features, cool demeanor, pee-your-pants funny (okay, maybe not such a good trait if you’re trying to hook up with him, but you get my point).  Can you think of anything unsexy about Ben? Well, just in case you’re having trouble working up your mojo, I’ve compiled a few reasons why he’s my boy-toy of the week.

Why do I want to eff Ben? Let me count the ways:

1) He’s really effing smart (“How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can’t even fit inside the building?”–from Zoolander).

2) He’s really effing humble (“I couldn’t believe that she knew my name. Some of my best friends didn’t know my name.”–from There’s Something About Mary).

3) He can play hard to get (“If you can get it from my kung-fu grip then you can come and have it, okay? Otherwise, step off, bitch!” –from Meet the Parents).

4) He’ll show you who’s boss (“You can’t be my boss! Nobody’s my boss! I’m my own boss! I created myself!”–from Dodgeball).

5) He knows the meaning of sacrifice (“Since we have been together I have felt more uncomfortable, out of place, embarrassed, and just physically sick then I have in my entire life. But I could not have gone through that, I could not have thrown up 19 times in 48 days if I was not in love with you.” — from Along Came Polly). Read More »

Everybody’s doing it.  There’s different types, names, and ways to do it.   Two girls, one guy.  One girl, one guy.  Two guys.  You name it, it happens.   And according to New York City’s most trusted paper, this oh-so unusual and odd act causes “peer pressure,” and is leaving parents “baffled.”   That’s right everybody,  we’re talking about hugging.

I didn’t think The Times could get more desperate for a relevant “News” story after discussing the dangers of texting, but it looks like I was wrong. It seems that texting-thumb isn’t the biggest issue plaguing our generation right now. The real question?  To hug or not to hug.

Underage drinking is dangerous.  Drugs, sex, whatever.  But hugs?  I’m pretty sure those things are safe.  They are not things to fear or be worried about, as the Times is portrating them; they’re hugs! They’re innocent yet meaningful exchanges among people, not some gateway drug that will eventually lead to middle school prostitution.

It’s funny, but also infuriating that the Times would make such a big deal about a simple hug. The way they’re talking, you’d think kids were giving blow jobs in the halls. And if that were the case, I’d understand. I mean, that changes the whole story…literally: Read More »

We all know the infamous Nair song, “Who Wears Short Shorts?!”

Not me.

I’ve never really been a fan of shorts, namely because they never were really a fan of me. The ones that were considered in style were too short and all others looked like I was a mom out of 1987. They made me look chubbier, they gave me a camel toe (which is reason right there to hate them: “is your crotch hungry, girl ’cause it’s eating your pants”), and they were just so unflattering. And even worse, when you don’t have sticks for legs and you walk around a humid city in shorts, your legs rub together. Cute shorts or not, that is just a whole other level of uncomfortable that I’d rather not deal with. Then you have to start waddling, then your shorts ride up you pull them down and it looks like you are picking out a front wedgie…

It’s just bad news all over.

But not any more! Ladies, grab that Nair, forget about its heinous rotten egg smell (yummmy!), and get your legs r-e-a-d-y.

This season there are so many shorts in so many lengths that you CAN find a pair that works for you. Trust me, if I can find a pair I love, then lord knows you can too. And you don’t have to shell out the big bucks for bottoms that you can only wear 3 months out of the year in most parts of the country. Can I get a “what, what”?!

Here are my picks for cute, cheap and most-likely-to-be flattering shorts. High waisted and linen are great with wedges for day or night, bermudas are best worn with a high shoe, and colored bottoms are only for those who don’t mind attention in that area. And for those hot, casual days – pair a casual short with a tank top, long necklace and some flip flops and you’re good. to. go.

Bring on the shorts! (Click on the images below for all the deets.) Read More »

We’re really excited that guys are finally catching on and taking care of things downtown, but “trimming the bush to make the tree look taller”? WTF?

Whenever we need to make a difficult decision, we make a list.

“Gym or TV?”
“Jeans or dress?”
“Save money or buy a new iPhone?”

So when we are constantly faced with the awful decision of which fame whore couple is more fame whorey, we make a list. No, this isn’t Sophie’s choice, but it’s our choice and it’s hard.

Moving on.

This week’s showdown is between two “celebrity” couples that spend their days on the cover of every tabloid on earth. Which couple should have kept the cameras out of their lives? Do we really have to choose?! Read More »

I saw a guy yesterday wearing two pastel polo shirts with both collars popped. Yesterday. As in 2009. Where was this kid’s girlfriend/friends to inform him that the popped collar thing went out in 2005? Or, I don’t know, that the double pastel shirt look wasn’t OK on a guy even then? Friends don’t let friends pop their collars (anymore)!

I felt bad for the kid. Here he was, thinking he was lookin’ all cool in his pink and purple shirts while the rest of the world pointed and laughed. (And by “rest of the world,” I mean “me.” I couldn’t help it! He was wearing white loafers with them!) I wanted to reach out and give that kid a much needed makeover, but I was also late for a manicure so I just sort of let it go.

But now I want to give back. There are so many things that guys don’t know or understand. Whether they are getting bad information, or ignoring the good information that they get, guys are constantly misguided. This week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share the most important piece of wisdom they would want guys to know. Pass this on to any and all men in your life – they need it. Share your own advice/thoughts in the comments section below!

Laura – St. Johns: Don’t fart on me. Seriously, my boyfriend did this last night and almost died.

Brithny – Duke: PMS stands for Permissible Man-Slaughter and also Preposterous Mood Swings. So during that time, please forgive us for anything crazy we may do. And lots of wine and candy would be nice too.

Charlsie – Hollins: When you are in a relationship, the number of people your girlfriend has slept with before you has no correlation with how much she loves you, adores you, and wants to be with YOU. Don’t bring up the past — she loves YOU!

Lauren – University of Michigan: When you are workin’ on a lady with your hand, deeper does not mean better. You are not a gyno…and we don’t really want you to be. Read More »

This makes me uncomfortable.

Pulling out may just work!

Openly gay student wins prom queen.

Apparently Tori Spelling killed her father.

Lindsay Lohan can’t catch a break.

So, why are these dudes single?

Last spring, I was gearing up to graduate and was waiting for the job offers to come rolling in. Instead, the only opportunity that came my way was a summer internship. At the time, I was making plenty of money waiting tables, but I knew that the added experience of an internship would add to my credentials– even if it meant taking a pay cut. So I moved to upstate New York to a place that was a five-hour drive from everyone I would care to visit.

When I first got there, I quickly realized that this job sucked. My boss, the woman who had hired me, misinformed me when I had inquired about the hours, the workload, and the learning potential of the position during my interview. However, by the end of August, when it was time to pack up and move on, I realized I had just had one of the best summers of my life.

Before I go into the ways that you, too, can make the most of your summer internship, let me explain why mine was so terrible. I had been hired by a nonprofit regional theater company as an administrative intern for their summer season. As an English major who was trying to break into theater, that sounded right up my alley when my boss had described my duties. However, when I arrived, I quickly learned that the majority of my time would be spent serving as assistant house manager — ripping tickets and listening to patrons bitch for 8 shows a week. Read More »

We may all start paying for online news.

Welcome back, Freddie Prinze Jr.!

People really hate Katherine Heigl.

Is breakup bitterness a medical condition?

Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig coming to Broadway?

Healthy meals on a budget.

Whatcha thinking about?  If you’re anything like me, you’re thinking about food.  I literally ate about five minutes ago, but that doesn’t stop images of delicious dinner selections from flashing through my brain.  I blame it on my incessant need to plan and organize (but let’s be honest – I just like food).

Apparently, I’m not alone in the meal-obsessed department.  According to a new study, women spend about 44 minutes a day thinking about food (almost 10 minutes more than men, on average).  That’s TWO YEARS of your life!  And yet, I still think that’s an underestimation. (Seriously – I think about food all. the. time.)

Now that I see the (scary and embarrassing) facts laid out in front of me, I can’t help but wonder what I could do with my life if I wasn’t always thinking about food.  Maybe I could have graduated in three years at the top of my class and gotten an awesome job straight out of college.  Maybe I could have a couple novels published by now.  Maybe I could weigh 15lbs less than I do now.  The possibilities are endless!

It’s all too much to think about, especially since dinner is coming up in a couple hours.  Mmm, beef and broccoli or a grilled cheese sandwich?  I’ll have to think about it…